Author Archive
I was born on the last day of the year. So the annual transition of “out with the old and in with the new” feels especially pivotal to me as I reflect with gratitude upon what once was, I look forward with hope and anticipation for what is yet to come, and I explore more deeply the larger reason for my birth. And, yes, I do make some “New Year’s Resolutions”; however, they have nothing to do with resolving to fit into last year’s pair of blue jeans. And while more money flowing into my bank account rather than out of it would bring some much-needed financial relief, I will not be making that my top priority either. Nor will I be committing to get a better job or setting my sights on traveling around the world sampling exotic foods.
Part of the reason why I believe New Year’s Resolutions “fail” is because the purpose for which we enter into such agreements with ourselves has very little to do with the purpose of our lives. I am sharing a letter I wrote to my 18-year-old son, as it captures the essence of how I feel about the arrival of a new year. The gifts I have been given the opportunity to receive and give within the context of my relationship with my son have been some of the most profound and life-changing. And I believe deeply that by allowing the gifts to flow through me to you, they become a gift to us all.
“Dear James,
As night gently falls on 2012 and the promise of a new dawn in 2013 hangs in the air, billions of people around the world will be resolving and committing to make changes in their life, hoping to stick to long-lasting resolutions that will finally deliver to them the things in life we all desire most — abundance, prosperity, better health, joy, security, happiness, and love — believing that this time, this year, their well-intentioned efforts will resemble more than simply a “to do” list for the first week of January.
I wonder if you, too, feel that yearning, if you hear a beckoning to a higher calling, if you desire to make new choices with an eye on shaping and defining not just your experience for a particular year, but with an eye on shaping and defining the entire purpose of your life. Ah, the purpose of life — the question that has perplexed scholars and religious teachers around the world, the question which has led countries into war and tested and stretched the fabric of every relationship we enter into, the question that is most looked at in the final moments of our physical being here on earth:
What is the purpose of my life?
My Beloved Son, I am here to share with you the answer.
I will begin by sharing with you what the purpose of your life is not. As my good friend, Neale, has shared many, many times, the purpose of life has very little to do, if anything, with “getting the girl, getting the car, getting the job, getting the house, getting the spouse, getting the kids, getting the better job, getting the better house, getting the promotion, getting the grandkids, getting the gray hair, getting the office in the corner, getting the retirement watch, getting the illness, getting the burial plot, and getting the hell out.”
And so far, in the 46 years that I have been blessed to have on this earth, this has demonstrated itself to be true – life is not about any of those things. I’ve had most of the things on that list, and some of them more than once. And I am here to tell you that the purpose for my life was not realized or remembered by “getting” or “having” any one of them.
So if life really isn’t about any of those things, then what is it about?
This is what I know to be true:
The purpose of your life is to create the purpose of your life.
When you were a very young child, it mattered not to me whether you played baseball or joined Cub Scouts, whether you went swimming or read a book, or whether you ate pizza or spaghetti. And now, as a young man who is living on his own, it matters not to me which career you choose or what area of the world you reside in, what you have for dinner, how you enjoy your spare time, or what kind of clothes you wear.
Do not confuse “not mattering” with “not loving.” My love for you is without conditions. These choices would only matter to me if somehow the level of my love for you was attached to a particular outcome designed by me or hinged to a misguided idea that somehow you could fail in this Life game.
I want for you what you want for you.
And here is where it gets even better, James:
God wants for us what we want for us.
Society will tell you that in order to “earn” God’s love, you must be a certain way and do certain things. Have you questioned this for yourself? Have you wondered why a God who is “unconditionally loving” would place such conditions upon his love? Have you dared to imagine a different kind of God?
And if God wants for us what we want for us, and the purpose of our lives have nothing to do with what we have or what we get, what will the arrival of a new year mean to you? What will you strive for? What will you draw upon to ascribe meaning to the experiences in your life?
Your life is an opportunity. Within every occurrence, there is an opportunity for you. And within every relationship, you are an opportunity for someone else. Will you see those moments and embrace those gifts, both those that are being given to you and those you have to give? As the world collectively and consciously welcomes the New Year, perhaps the largest number of people purposefully and simultaneously placing positive energy and intention into the world, how could our world not become a better place? Where will you be in that process? And WHO will you be in that process?
What will you decide and what will you declare the purpose of your life to be, my beloved son?”
What will the arrival of a New Year mean to you, my friends? A new car? More money? Fitting in last year’s blue jeans? Or perhaps at last the answer to one of life’s biggest questions: What is the purpose of my life?
(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team atwww.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)
Pope Benedict XVI said, no, we are not in his annual Christmas message to the world, one of his most important speeches of the year, where he once again proclaimed that same-sex marriage is destroying “the essence of humanity.”
“People dispute the idea that they have a nature, given to them by their bodily identity, that serves as a defining element of the human being,” he said at the Vatican. “They deny their nature and decide that it is not something previously given to them, but that they make it for themselves.”
He further went on to say, “When freedom to be creative becomes the freedom to create oneself, then necessarily the Maker himself is denied and ultimately man too is stripped of his dignity as a creature of God.”
Could it be, as Pope Benedict suggests, that life truly is a shallow existence of “what you get is what you get”?
What would the Pope tell a child born a hermaphrodite, a condition in which someone is born with both female and male sex organs – a body given to him by God, by the way? Too bad? You deserve no one? Or perhaps the contrary: “Lucky you, you can have a relationship with whoever you want”?
And what about the Pope himself who has been “defined” by God as a male, given a penis, and yet chooses not to fall in line with that “identity” and chooses not to express romantic love to a female and chooses not to enter into intimate relationships? According to his own definition, is he not “denying” his own “nature” that God intended for him to share in intimacy with a woman and to reproduce? Is he not participating in his own freedom and creativity in an effort to self-define who he is and what he believes about why he is here?
Aren’t we ALL doing that very same thing?
Why are we being told to feel bound to our physicality when it comes to S-E-X, but celebrated when we demonstrate our capacity for greatness beyond our bodies in other ways?
My friend, Mark, whose body is partially paralyzed and riddled with unrelenting pain – again, the body given to him by God — climbed 108 floors of the Sears Tower in Chicago…and plans to do it again this year. I imagine it would be quite difficult to find anyone who would say Mark has “stripped himself of his dignity” by creating a new definition of himself that expanded far beyond his physicality.
But again, I get it. We are talking about the unspeakable, the shameful, the only-talked-about-in-a-whisper topic of S-E-X.
However, the Pope’s declaration of “Gay marriage, like abortion and euthanasia, is a threat to world peace” appears to be falling upon deaf ears as the Constitutional Court in largely Roman Catholic Spain upheld the law legalizing gay marriage last month, the British government announced it will introduce a bill next year legalizing gay marriage, and in France, President Francois Hollande has said he would enact his “Marriage for Everyone” plan within a year of taking office last May.
These are the visionaries, the writers of our New Cultural Story, the mold-shatterers and rule-breakers who do not believe in a God that makes mistakes. They are not buying into the twisted idea that God would create something so extraordinary and then make it wrong.
What these New Cultural Story global authors do believe in is Love. They do not believe same-sex marriage is destroying the essence of humanity, but rather that it IS the essence of humanity. They believe that love transcends everything and is denied to no one, that Love that has no rules and is certainly not reserved for only a select few to be experienced in a select way, and that the biggest continuing threat to world peace is not found, as Pope Benedict suggested, within the loving union of a same-sex partnership, but rather in a belief system that embraces and promotes a vengeful and judgmental God.
(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team atwww.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)
Some of our most significant breakthroughs and remembrances in life are experienced in the midst of those less-warm and less-fuzzy moments we find ourselves presented with. I’m sure most of us could come up with a time or two in our life when the light of hope and love pierced through walls of darkness.
Laura Jean Pringle’s collection of unique and spiritually edgy poems in “Meanderings of a Wayward Spirit: Lyrics in the Rough” takes you on a twist-and-turn, up-and-down journey through some of life’s most colorful and sometimes challenging occurrences, offering a fresh and “color outside the lines” perspective from the author’s own life experiences.
Laura’s poetry paints with a brush dipped in her own personal truth how it feels to stretch and bend around the curves and hairpin turns in our Soul Journey and how exhilarating and cleansing it can feel to express authentically through confusion and frustration, how to push through the illusion of fear and experience that love is at the root of everything.
And that is the theme and message carried through the pages of her heartfelt and raw sharings, which happens to also be the underlying message held within the New Spirituality:
Love is all there is.
Laura Jean Pringle’s poetry book “Meanderings of a Wayward Spirit: Lyrics in the Rough” can be purchased here on Amazon.com.
(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team atwww.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)
(If there is a book, movie, music CD, etc. that you would like to recommend to our worldwide audience, please submit it to our Managing Editor, Lisa McCormack, for possible publication in this space. Not all submissions can be published, due to the number of submissions and sometimes because of other content considerations, but all are encouraged. Send submissions to Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com. Please label the topic: “Review”)
This year Christmas did not arrive for me wrapped up in pretty packages with shiny bows, I did not feel the essence of Christmas by getting that front-row parking space at the mall on the busiest shopping day of the year, and I did not experience Christmas by savoring all the extraordinary food and festivities that plentifully show up this time of year.
I experienced Christmas in the airport.
As we joyfully awaited the arrival of my son’s plane near the gate, I noticed the people gathered around: little children in their pajamas, parents poised with video cameras, families hugging, laughing, crying, some people sleeping on the floor, men with flowers, women with gifts, all anticipating the return of someone special.
The realization was palpable.
You could see Christmas.
You could hear Christmas.
You could smell Christmas.
You could FEEL Christmas.
But it had nothing to do with trinkets or doo-dads, shopping malls or Christmas sweaters, cookies or egg nog, churches or Santa Claus.
It had everything to do with our relationship with each other.
Christmas serves as a reminder of our presence in each other’s lives. And on this particular day, in the wee hours of the morning, I experienced the significance of being in that Holy Space, witnessing and feeling the significance of who we are to each other. And while I was especially tuned in to the long-awaited reunion with my beloved son, I became keenly aware of the larger picture, that this night was an opportunity to experience unity with all those gathered together; that what I became a part of was no coincidence, but rather an invitation to carry forward what I was experiencing beyond the walls of the international airport, out into the world, and into the lives of others.
And not only to carry this experience forward simply through Christmas Day, but to extend the appreciation of and gratitude for who we are in relation to each other in every moment of my life…even in the moments when we must physically part once again with a loved one. In two weeks, when I find myself at the international airport again, but this time to say goodbye, I will enter the space with those gathered around with intention and compassion, knowing that we are all in that Holy Space not only with each other, but for each other…and that we are ALL each other’s loved one.
And I will once again discover Christmas in the airport.
(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team atwww.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)
If today was your Birth Day, the first day of your life on earth, knowing what you know now, what would you do differently?
What would you change?
Today, December 21, 2012, may hold significant meaning to you. Or perhaps it may just be like any other day, holding no more meaning or significance other than the fact that it is Friday, marking the end of a long workweek, simply the day before the weekend.
To me, this day represents opportunity. Whether we embrace this day as one of importance or not, the opportunity is still presenting itself to us to create and recreate our idea of who we are according to and in alignment with our next-highest thought and next-highest vision. We can choose to step into that opportunity…or not.
It really is as simple as that.
Perhaps this day is a symbol of the space between “what once was” and “what is yet to come,” a realm where everything is fluid and free, expanding and contracting, undecided and willing, hopeful and perfect….a pristine representation of the Glorious Moment of Now.
Maybe today reflects that moment we experience at the end of our exhale, just before our body begins to inhale another breath, a brief glimpse of nothing needed, nothing wanted…the stillness in our beingness, the peacefulness in our completeness.
Perhaps today will mark the end of life as we know it, but not in the way we have been coerced into believing. Within the space of our next choice, we could put an end to many of the conditions in our world which interfere with each and every person’s ability to experience joy and freedom and love and companionship and prosperity and comfort.
Some people think the opposite of love is hate. However, the opposite of love is not hate. The opposite of love is indifference. For me, December 21, 2012, symbolizes a return to love, a return to the essence of who we really are.
Am I standing in the light of my own truth?
How am I showing up in my relationships?
Why am I right here…right now?
How may I serve?
This particular date has received a lot of attention, but we don’t have to wait for a particular day or month or year to create change. We can do so within the infinite number of Birth Moments in our lives. As Conversations with God offered to us, “The deepest secret is that life is not a process of discovery, but a process of creation. You are not discovering yourself, but creating yourself anew.”
Birthdays are days to celebrate. And birthdays are often a time to give and receive gifts. So today I celebrate our collective birth and offer my presence as my gift so that each and every person I encounter shall have an opportunity to return to love and to know and experience God.
Happy Birth Day.
(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team atwww.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.
Chaos, noise, career demands, illness, violence, emotional pressures, and stress are all reminders to us. They remind us of the importance of meditation in our lives, both physically and spiritually. However, for many, meditating in what some might term the “typical way” does not come with ease and sometimes evolves into an experience of frustration and disappointment…and eventually giving up.
You are not alone.
For those of you who may be experiencing roadblocks in your meditation practice, or simply don’t have the slightest idea where to begin, I am here to share with you one of my very favorite CDs: “Soul of Healing Affirmations” by Deepak Chopra.
I purchased this CD a couple years ago because I was having trouble falling asleep. I was searching for something to help relax my body and quiet my mind before going to bed, and this CD showed up in my life.
Utilizing the powerful process of affirmations, accompanied by soul-centered music, the tranquil voice of Deepak Chopra gently moves you through an A to Z guided journey — what Deepak calls an “A-Z Guide to Programming the Software of the Soul”:
Acceptance
Bonding
Compassion
Divinity in Me
Empowerment
Fear
Giving
Higher Self
Intention
Judge not Today
Kindness
Love
Mindfulness
Nurturing
Opposition
Presence
Question
Relationship
Self Referral
Trust
Understanding
Vision
Wisdom
X Factor
Yes to Life
Zero
The good news is meditation does not come in only one flavor. It does not have to be done in a candlelit room, with your legs crossed, eyes closed, for hours on end. We can meditate through mindfulness or noticing the moment, through prayer, in a walking or moving meditation such as yoga, through chanting, or in silence.
As in all of life, there is no right or wrong way…only what works best for you.
Whether you are new to meditation and looking for a tool to assist you, or perhaps you desire a unique and enjoyable way to relax, or maybe you are seeking to deepen your spiritual awareness, I highly recommend adding the “Soul of Healing Affirmations” by Deepak Chopra to your meditation and life experience.
This CD can be purchased and downloaded on Amazon.com.
(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)
(If there is a book, movie, music CD, etc. that you would like to recommend to our worldwide audience, please submit it to our Managing Editor, Lisa McCormack, for possible publication in this space. Not all submissions can be published, due to the number of submissions and sometimes because of other content considerations, but all are encouraged. Send submissions to Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com. Please label the topic: “Review”)
This one-word question is surfacing in the minds for so many today, December 14, 2012, as the news of the school shooting in the small town of Newtown, Connecticut, quickly spread around the world.
Why?
A question which may never be fully answered.
As we try to make some small amount of sense out of a situation that simply makes no sense, I join Neale in his invitation to feel, to talk, to share, to explore the way you feel around today’s events and to support those around you who could benefit from a mutual exchange of loving energy and a compassionate presence.
So at this point, let’s set aside the “Why?” for now and give ourselves permission to feel what we feel…and feel it deeply; to allow ourselves to grieve fully and without conditions or limitations; and to experience the highest level of Love as it expresses through our sadness.
Let us join together to connect with our brothers and sisters in Connecticut within the space of our hearts, drawing upon the essence of who we really are, and be a source of comfort and hope and unconditional love. If ever there was a moment to decide, to declare, and to demonstrate who you choose to be, I can’t think of a better time than now.
I will close with a reflection from Fred Rogers:
“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’ To this day, especially in times of ‘disaster,’ I remember my mother’s words and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers – so many caring people in this world.”
(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)
It is not unusual for our children to come home with their backpacks overflowing with homework assignments to complete and projects to create. But what would you think and how would you feel if you found this assignment in your young child’s school bag:
“You’ve just turned 18. You’ve decided to end your life. Your decision is definitive. In a final surge you decide to put in words the reason behind your decision. In the style of a self-portrait, you describe the disgust you have for yourself. Your text will retrace certain events in your life at the origin of these feelings.”
In the town of Montmoreau-Saint-Cybard, Southwestern France, an unamed teacher handed out this homework note to his 13- and 14-year-old students at the collège Antoine-Delafont.
The Telegraph reports the French teacher has been suspended after the local school authority found out about the assignment and after a group of outraged parents complained in an anonymous letter to the school, saying they were horrified their children were given the assignment.
It was further reported in The Telegraph that the president of the FCPE parents’ union in Montmoreau, Christophe Clément, said such a subject is “practically inciting (pupils) to commit suicide.”
“Jean-Marie Renault, the local education authority head, said the teacher had been officially notified of his suspension, adding: ‘Telling a pupil that he is about to end his life and that he must recount it appears troubling to us.’”
“Geneviève Fioraso, France’s higher education minister, waded in, saying: ‘If the topic was launched in this way, without accompaniment, without context, it’s dangerous.’”
However, in spite of the flurry of disapproval surrounding this unique and controversial story, a large group of parents, students, and fellow colleagues have come together in support of this teacher’s actions, asking for the reinstatement of this beloved teacher into the school system.
One parent asks, “What do you think they talk about in the playground? The images they see on TV are far more shocking.”
Another parent said, “Suicide is part of daily life. Perhaps the teacher wished to raise their awareness of the issue.”
The group consensus within the circle of supporters was that the media coverage had been “over the top and inappropriate,” noting that the subject had “not shocked” pupils and it had been “well presented” by the teacher.
Is it likely that an assignment like this could or would actually cause a young mind to contemplate suicide?
Or could an assignment like this provide a young mind an opportunity to explore and express a part of themselves that is not touched upon in the day-to-day experiences of their lives?
If someone truly were on the edge of ending life as we know it to be in this human experience, what insights and truth might that person feel more inclined to share in the absence of suffering the consequences of being judged or ridiculed or ignored?
Are we limiting the fullest expressions of our children, and ourselves, by restricting what we naturally feel drawn to do – express who we are? Even when that expression may not be what we expect or want to hear?
Where does an assignment like this invite us to go?
And why do we fear going there?
In the book When Everything Changes, Change Everything, we are taught how our minds draw upon and utilize the past data of our lives to help form the basis of our current reality. And the way we experience life – reality – will depend upon what type of data we are relying upon. Perhaps “retracing the events in a child’s life and the origins of their feelings,” as this teacher invited these students to do, will provide to these children at a very tender age an opportunity to understand more fully what source, or data, their thoughts and beliefs are foundationed upon…which would lead them to an understanding of why they might hold any feelings of “disgust” for themselves…which would then present an opportunity to change their thoughts, change their perspectives, and change their beliefs about who they are, thus altering the way in which they experience all of life.
This type of exploration would serve to remind us that speaking our truth about who we are is not something to be reserved for the end of our lives. Maybe a child’s limited idea about who they are or any harsh judgments they have placed upon themselves could be transformed into a remembrance and realization of their own significance and purpose in the world within the parameters of one simple yet profound exercise.
Why would we want to deny anyone that opportunity?
(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)
I recently stumbled upon a Facebook page titled “Grief Beyond Belief.” It is a support page, whose members exceed 6,000, created for the specific purpose of being a gathering space for people who are experiencing grief as a result of loss in their life. The common denominator, however, for this unique website is that those who subscribe to the “Grief Beyond Belief” updates are not simply people who are suffering grief and loss, but these are people who do not believe in God.
As I perused through the comments on this Facebook page, I read post after post from people struggling with unanswered questions and trying to make sense of some type of loss, whether that was showing up in the form of a relationship ending or the death of a loved one, or even the loss of a beloved pet. The pattern was quick to see, people seeking and searching, yearning for comfort, but unwilling to adopt any ideology or concept that invites them to consider anything larger than what simply lies before them – many of them so disenfranchised by the “in your face” religious zealots that they have elected to believe in not believing.
It is interesting how this particular page showed up for me today as I recently put my own belief system “to the test” while visiting the website of Sam Harris, a well-known critic of religion and one of the “four horsemen” — together with Richard Dawkins, Daniel Dennett, and Christopher Hitchens — in the “New Atheism” movement. A wonderful quote taken from his writings on stem cell research led me to his website, where I watched several hours of him debating the existence of God with religious and spiritual leaders from around the world. And while I understand that his pushback is more particularly directed at organized religions, namely Christianity and Islam, for a brief period of time, I allowed myself to imagine a life without God.
I imagined how it would feel to not know, or even consider the possibility, that I am connected to all of life in some significant way.
I imagined how different my life would be without a higher purpose for any of my thoughts, any of my expressions, and any of my choices.
I imagined for a moment that this was it, that my life was reduced to the 60, 70, 80, or 90ish years that I may randomly and singularly experience and how I could possibly “make the best” of them…or what that would even mean.
I imagined for a moment that my relationships were circumstantial – and, for that matter, that everything that happened in my life was circumstantial, arbitrary, and spiritually meaningless. What would now be the purpose for my relationships?
I imagined the day my son was born and how that would have been an entirely different experience. In the absence of God, the overwhelming sense of divine perfection and soul connection would have been diminished to a matter-of-fact scientific explanation involving sperm and eggs.
There were times in my life where it felt scary and lonely to imagine a God who punishes and judges, a God who condemns, a God who is separate from me. But imagining that God did not even exist allowed me to experience aloneness and fear on a whole new level. The fundamental question of “Who am I?” suddenly meant so little as it could no longer produce an answer that expanded beyond physicality, thereby limiting my entire human experience to simply a body made up of cells, blood, tissue, organs, veins, etc.
If there is no God…then who am I?
And why would it even matter why I was here and where I was going?
The atheism movement is growing at a surprisingly impressive rate, presenting a robust resistance to religious fundamentalism and righteousness. This secular segment of our world is made up of people who are no longer buying into the story which casts as its leading man an angry, needy, and vengeful God; yet this same group of people have likewise abandoned any concept of connectedness, divine design, higher purpose, and eternal life.
And this is why the New Spirituality movement is vital, a collective consciousness that does not support the “man on a cloud” theology, yet embraces divinity and oneness. The New Spirituality is a space that gives hope and cultivates purpose and bridges the gap between “no God” and “that God.” The New Spirituality does not teach people what to think, but rather that they can think; it does not tell you how to live your life, but rather how to create your life.
(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)
As we transition into the first week of December, the radio stations are also transitioning into their holiday musical line-up and beginning to play Christmas tunes, some stations devoting their entire program exclusively to “sounds of the season” 24 hours a day, seven days a week, all the way up to Christmas Day. So during my early-morning commute today, I was not surprised to hear Elvis Presley crooning “I’ll Have a Blue Christmas Without You” and Jon Bon Jovi belting out “Please Come Home for Christmas” and Mariah Carey sorrowfully singing “I Miss You Most at Christmastime.”
I’ve heard these particular songs hundreds, if not thousands, of times before. But today these three melancholy tunes caught my attention in a new way, one which invited me to think about how many people, myself included, are physically separated from their loved ones not only at Christmas, but for prolonged periods of time, whether that separation is as a result of children growing up and moving on to the next chapter in their lives, or due to a special friendship parting ways, or perhaps a loved one who has left this earthly realm to continue on in their eternal spiritual journey.
These physical separations have the potential to stir up a wealth of emotions and confusion, especially when the way we desire our relationships to be experienced is entirely different than the way in which they are actually physically showing up – or not showing up – in our lives.
But are we as separated from our loved ones as we imagine ourselves to be?
Is there a way to actually experience the presence of those who no longer share a physical proximity with us? Not only at Christmas, but all the time?
If we limit our definition of “relationship” to include only that which we experience in physicality, our answer to that question may cause us to miss a most extraordinary spiritual opportunity.
Have you ever experienced the essence of someone you love without them being physically in the room with you? Have you actually felt the wonder and intimacy of a Beloved Other even in the absence of their physical being beside you? Has a particular aroma or unique sound or distinct taste triggered an opportunity to actually relive, in a palpable way, a moment with somebody who is no longer physically here?
We are provided infinite opportunities to experience our loved ones through the path of our consciousness. For me personally, the smell of roses delivers to me an experience of being a very young child, cuddling on my mother’s lap after she bathed and luxuriated herself in Rose Milk Body Lotion, instantaneously drawing into my consciousness my mother and an opportunity to be with her in a way that transcends physicality. The gentle sound of an acoustic guitar gifts me with an opportunity to linger within the essence of my 18-year-old son and his music, who now resides on the other side of the country. A large percentage of the people in my life with whom I share an intimate or especially meaningful relationship live nowhere near me, yet their presence is significant and certain.
And this is because what we choose to focus on and what we choose to see will determine What we experience and Who we experience and How we experience. Life calls upon us to do and be many different things. And as a result, we may find ourselves physically separated from what we have come to know as our most important and cherished relationships. Yet day after day, year after year, lifetime after lifetime people manage to move through these transitions and changes, most often to experience an even deeper level of love and a more profound level of awareness. And this is because we truly are never separate from each other.
Our relationships never end, as we imagine or perceive they do. The existence or magnitude of a relationship cannot be measured in terms of physical distance or closeness. Relationships simply change the form in which you experience them, and a physical “separation” may be just the thing that allows us to know and experience not only who we are in relation to each other but who we are in relation to our Self.
Perhaps this holiday season will provide you an opportunity to create a new experience, one which celebrates the presence of a loved one in an extraordinary yet familiar way. Maybe the warm embrace of a loved one will be experienced through the surrogacy of a child’s tender hug or seen in a stranger’s smiling eyes or warmly felt through the gentle touch of an unknown passerby.
Maybe, just maybe, you truly are as close as your next thought.
(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team atwww.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)
