Author Archive
Recovery from addiction, self absorption, behavioral deficiencies, and even old world thinking are one in the same. The first thing that is needed for change to take place is desire. Many times it also takes outside pressure to make “flip the switch” in our brain.
Closed-mindedness is the enemy to change. Most of us have a desire to be “right” about how we do life. We spend an enormous amount of energy on proving ourselves to be correct and in the process making other “wrong.” Denial is a defense mechanism of the ego that we use to shield ourselves from criticism. The willingness to address this denial and closed-mindedness is critical to change, and ultimately, happiness.
Opening our minds to ideas that may seem foreign or “wrong” doesn’t mean accepting these things as true, it just means that we are willing to look and listen, maybe even try it out. We can always go back to our way of doing things if these new suggestions do not bring us to a greater place of joy and freedom. After all, isn’t joy and freedom what we are all looking for here? I haven’t met anyone who truly lives just to be more miserable. Yet some people spend a great deal of their lives, maybe even all of their lives, unhappy.
I’m here to say it doesn’t have to be that way.
Life is constantly changing. That is what life is all about. Everything is in motion at all times. It is certainly true that people are changing all the time. Resisting this change is where our unhappiness is rooted. Going with change, and accepting it, opens us up to feeling better about situations that we are not really comfortable in. Finding an attitude of gratitude, even for unpleasant experiences, will serve our happiness better in the long run. One of the most profound statements to come from CwG is “what you resist, persists.” The follow up to that is, “what you look at disappears.”
Developing a practice of quieting the mind is key to handling the stresses of life with more control and confidence. The minds of the addicted are constantly racing. The unharnessed mind is the enemy to serenity and peace. Many times in our lives our conflicts escalate because we don’t stop to think about the appropriate responses. Our society pressures us to have quick replies, and immediate results. We constantly find ourselves falling into the rabbit hole because we don’t stop to take a breath and quiet our mind before we fire off a retort.
Saying yes to opportunities that stretch our comfort zone often reaps fantastic rewards. If you have ever seen the movie Yes Man with Jim Carrey I have found this practice to be very much like the movie. In our active spiritual life we are inspired to call forth new experiences in our lives. We set our intentions on whatever it is, we say a prayer or two requesting things, then we sit back and wait for them to appear, only to be disappointed and discouraged.
We ask,”what is the problem?” I have done all the right things, set my intentions, prayed, put into place a mantra or incantation practice, and I still have not experienced what I asked for. We assume that God said no.
Well God never says no. The answer is always yes, and it is always immediate. The problem is, in most cases, we didn’t know what to look for. Many times the experience is dangled in front of us, but the road looks too scary or risky and we turn back. Sometimes we say no to things that appear out of the blue because we are skeptical or cynical.
Being aware that life is a contextual field reminds us that where one thing exists the opposite must also exist in order for us to fully grasp the grandness of anything. So if the opposite is presenting when you ask for a thing, bless it and thank it for its presence, for without the opposite we cannot appreciate the fullness of a thing.
So here is a quick list of my favorite practices. These are the things that I find expand my consciousness, while at the same time opening up more space for me to experience happiness, joy and freedom, the holy trinity of a wonderful life.
1. Yoga – Healing the body, focusing the mind, tending to the spirit. You cannot beat yoga for finding peace. Side benefits: the people you find in the rooms are on the same journey as you. Looking for peace, health, and love. Not just looking, but creating.
2. Reading – Find the books that open your heart and your mind. Study them deeply. If you find something that works, keep on doing it. Then share it. What you give to another you give to yourself.
3. Communicate- And when I say communicate I do not mean talking only. Listening is a lost art in our culture. So far lost that is really all people want from others is that they just listen. You don’t have to have the answers, in fact, you shouldn’t have the answers. We all have our own answers; many times we just need another to be a heart with ears. Listening, not judging or condemning.
4. Drop expectations – When we expect things to appear there can be only two results. One, we get the thing. Two, we don’t. And if we expect something and get the opposite result, suffering can take place. It is great to have a preference for a result, but expectations usually end in letdown.
5. Be creative – And I don’t mean painting pictures or drawing elaborate plans, although those are wonderful things to do. What I mean is intentionally create your state of being. Decide before hand what it is you wish to be, and then be it.
6. Step outside your comfort zone – It has been said that if your palms aren’t sweating, you aren’t living, and I believe that is true. Great joy can be found in putting on our big boy and girl pants and living on the edge of comfort. Sometimes this just looks like starting a conversation with a stranger on an elevator instead of staring at the wall wishing the doors would open.
(Kevin McCormack, C.A.d ,is a certified addictions professional and Recovery Advocate. He is a recovering addict with 26 years of sobriety. Kevin is a practicing auriculotherapist, recovery coach, and interventionist specializing in individual and family recovery. Kevin has a passion for holistic living, personal awareness training, and physical meditation. You can visit his website Life After Addicton for more information. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
Let’s play a little game here, shall we? I am going to assume you are sitting down right now reading this on your computer. If for some reason you are not, just do the opposite of what I ask of you. So here we go: Try to stand up. Now tell me this, are you standing or are you sitting? If you are standing, may I ask you if you tried to stand up or did you just stand up? If you are still sitting, did you try to stand or did you just sit there
The point I am trying to make here is, you never try to do something. You either do it or you don’t. For this blog we are going to use the addiction to smoking to illustrate the simplicity in ending addictive behavior. The problem is not in the ending of the behavior. The problem is starting it over again once you have quit. Smokers quit smoking many times every day and then one final time when they go to sleep at night. The problem is they start again once they awaken.
So how do we stay stopped?
What can we do to not start again?
First I am going to tell you what not to do. Oh you can if you want to but in all likelihood the following things will only be dead end streets down the same destructive path.
First of all, forget the patch. The patch infuses the body with nicotine, the drug in cigarettes that is highly addictive and destructive. You are not doing your body many favors by eliminating the smoke from your lungs while at the same time dumping harmful chemicals right into your blood stream. There is a much larger reason to stop smoking than just eliminating irritants from your lungs.
The next thing to put out of your mind is E-cigs. Ask yourself this question; Why am I considering quitting smoking? Take a good look at the answer. Is living a longer healthier life part of the equation? E-cigs have not been independently tested so we have no idea if inhaling nicotine is safe. Are we even sure that is the only chemical in them?
Do you think you can quit? I mean do you think you are capable of quitting smoking cigarettes? This is a big question here and the answer may just lead you down another road. If you really think you are not capable of stopping and staying stopped maybe the question you need to go back to is; who am I? In fact if you have not answered that question and deeply pondered it, now would be a good time to do so.
For anything we do in life we must have some form of belief that it can be done. We may not be fully sure we will succeed but we must believe on some level that it is possible. We may need to look outside of ourselves for assurance that it can be done. For quitting addiction, you only need to look so far as this column to see that someone has been able to remain drug, alcohol, and nicotine free for many years. If I can do it, you can do it too. We are made from the very same stuff!
Sometimes we have to look outside our self for our inspiration. This is where semi-blind faith comes into play. Believe that the God in you will give you all that you need to end this habitual self harm. See that others have gone before you and will tell you the great rewards they have had.
Take note of the benefits you will reap from quitting like enjoying the taste of foods and drinks again. That is one of the first things I noticed when I quit, not only to mention the money saved. Your health and wellness hangs in the balance here. Of course, in the eyes of God, there is nothing wrong with smoking, but is it bringing you where you say you want to go in life? Is this how you wish to treat the temple of your body? Is placing life-shortening chemicals in your lungs every 15 to 20 minutes the image you wish for others to see in you? Can you really say that while doing this you are acting out of self love? What would love do here and now? I think you know the answer.
(Kevin McCormack, C.A.d ,is a certified addictions professional and Recovery Advocate. He is a recovering addict with 26 years of sobriety. Kevin is a practicing auriculotherapist, recovery coach, and interventionist specializing in individual and family recovery. Kevin has a passion for holistic living, personal awareness training, and physical meditation. You can visit his website Life After Addicton for more information. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
Hi my name is (_________) and I am an addict, alcoholic, compulsive gambler, sex addict, risk taker, over-eater. These words are repeated daily by millions of people in recovery. The reason given for saying these things lies in the belief that those who forget are doomed to repeat. This is decent logic, but is there a better way to achieve the same result? And when I say better I mean, more effective. After all, isn’t effectiveness the goal of all that we do in life?
Life is all about the effects. Our thoughts, words and actions, are the process that we use to create the effects which we desire to experience in our lives. Not very many people would ever admit to striving for mediocrity, although behaviors may indicate otherwise. Most people wish for and strive for higher and higher effectiveness in their daily lives.
I’d like to call into question the logic of placing a derogatory statement about ourselves behind the two most powerful words in the human language. If those of us in recovery are seeking to remain abstinent from the substances and behaviors that we found ourselves unable to control, wouldn’t it stand to reason that we may want to make a more positive and empowering statement about who we are?
In the world of recovery there is most important thing is of course personal sobriety. In order to achieve and maintain long term sobriety a person either needs to be extremely determined not to use under any circumstances or create a life that is so grand that using would never even be an option. I recommend the second choice there if you are wondering. The first option is called abstinence or as the old timers would call it, “dry drunk.” The second option is called sobriety.
You may ask, what is the difference between abstinence and sobriety? That is a very good question. Abstinence is simply taking away the substance like alcohol or drugs and doing nothing at all about the underlying conditions that created the issues in the first place.
Sobriety is a daily practice of self awareness and self improvement. Persons who take on the role of raising their consciousness about themselves and their surroundings often find themselves to be happy and fulfilled, as well as inspiring to others. Sobriety in this form is very contagious and people flock to you to share in the energy.
Many words have negative energy as well as negative connotations surrounding them. Words like, junky, crackhead, drunkard, lush, addict, alcoholic etc, not only have a darkening effect on the user but also projects out that same dark energy to surrounding ears. Place the words “I am” right before them and we are actually summoning that definition to our reality.
There is a recovery film out now called “The Anonymous People.” If you get an opportunity to watch this please do. In this documentary the political history of the 12 step programs is investigated deeply. Many people have lobbied our politicians to find more funding for recovery programs and addiction treatment facilities. Currently the political answer to addiction is incarceration. Because we can all see how well the prison system is reforming people (sarcasm.)
So the question then becomes how is that one of the greatest public health threats, addiction, isn’t treated as a healthcare issue? One possible answer lies with the image of those of us in recovery. When a person who is not in recovery hears one of us introduce our self as, “Hi, I’m Kevin, and I am a drug addict.” They see a person with a moral deficiency.
The same “normal” person responds differently when I introduce myself in a more positive light. Hi, my name is Kevin McCormack. I am a person in long term recovery from the disease of addiction. For me long term means almost 27 years of continuous sobriety. In those 27 years I have experienced great things in my life such as a long term job of 20 plus years, continued education, but most of all the respect of my family, friends and self.
This type of shift in our language not only sheds light on the positive in our life which keeps our mind on what is most important, but it also brings about a certain level of respect and admiration from those who do not fully understand the disease of addiction.
Ultimately, personal recovery is goal number one, however, the twelve steps is very clear that “we cannot keep what we have without giving it away.” How can we give it away if we are hidden away in the basement of a church surrounded by those who have already found it?
Humanity would be well served if we took the anonymity of ourselves a little less literally. By all means I am not saying we should disclose someone else’s participation in recovery. But it serves very little good to keep who we are secret. It is time to stand together and raise the awareness of those in need. Recovery is possible. A happy, productive life is at your finger tips. Come walk with us, people in long term recovery who wish to help others achieve the same.
(Kevin McCormack, C.A.d ,is a certified addictions professional and Recovery Advocate. He is a recovering addict with 26 years of sobriety. Kevin is a practicing auriculotherapist, recovery coach, and interventionist specializing in individual and family recovery. Kevin has a passion for holistic living, personal awareness training, and physical meditation. You can visit his website Life After Addicton for more information. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
The United States spends fifty one billion ($51,000,000,000.00) annually (per year) on the war on drugs. Where is that getting us? Who is the beneficiary of this ginormous amount of money? Has anyone asked if the money could be spent in a more humanitarian effort such as programs and funding for those who wish to get out of the vicious cycle of addiction?
The war on drugs began during the Nixon presidency when President Nixon, rightly so, called drugs “public enemy number one.” Alcohol and other drugs account for the majority of people now being held in our prison system. Has anyone considered that it costs over $50,000 per year to house one person in a correctional facility? That money couldn’t be better spent trying to help people overcome addiction?
Don’t even get me started on the term “correctional facility.” The rate of recidivism is a steady forty percent. There are approximately two million people incarcerated in the United States alone. Of those people roughly one million are in jail on drug related offenses. This includes people arrested for marijuana offenses in states where pot is now completely legal!
The war on drugs is a very healthy economy for some. Many people have become uber rich thanks to this war. Some of these people are the most ruthless people on the planet. Mexican drug cartels, Afghanistan drug lords, Governments of third world countries to name just a few. Our war on drugs hasn’t saved any lives it has maimed and slaughtered countless innocent lives though.
There are some rumblings from Washington that they are going to take a look at the clemency issue for a few thousand prisoners who are in jails for drug related crimes. A few thousand is a drop in the bucket of the larger problem at hand. How do we get help to those who need it and want it?
As recovery advocates, myself and my peers struggle daily to find suitable help for those with their hand stretched out looking for assistance. I have to tell, if your wallet is empty, it isn’t going to be easy to get treatment. The good news is; it isn’t impossible. The sad part is; it isn’t getting any easier right now.
Currently only the best and most expensive insurance policies cover addiction treatment. Even in those cases the insurer usually dictates what that treatment is going to look like. Typically they will give the green light to outpatient treatment. This means you get to go see a counselor a few times a week for therapy. This is rarely sufficient to get a person off of addictive substances.
For addicts, the window of willingness to get help is very small. It may literally be only a matter of minutes that a person remains willing to be treated. An hour spent in therapy is merely a delay in the inevitable. Addicts recover best when they are in a group environment away from those people, places and substances that keep them in the vicious cycle of addiction.
Some insurers will agree to inpatient treatment, typically only 28 days however. Statistics show a greater success rate when patients remain in treatment for 90 days. Why wouldn’t we see those statistics and do what is best for the individual and society by giving treatment that is clearly better? If money is the sole answer, I know where there is $51,000,000,000.00 available to help!
I see the illusion of ignorance at work here. We have almost 45 years of data showing that the war on drugs has done nothing to stem drug use. The number of high school students that have admitted to using heroine is through the roof. Alcohol has its same foothold on our youth is it always has. Now that pot is becoming legal for recreational use the stigma will subside possibly leading to more widespread misuse. Of those who try it just because it is legal, some will switch on their addiction gene and move into full blown addiction.
Stopping people from using cannot be achieved by locking them up after they have already begun using. We need to do a better job of informing our population of the facts about addiction not propaganda. I never experienced “Refer Madness” nor did anyone else. It was just a lie and lies don’t work. What is the first thing we ask our kids when we suspect them of drug use? “Don’t lie to me, have you been using?” Not real helpful.
I wonder why the majority of politicians don’t see the impotence of the war on drugs and make an attempt to overhaul it. Just about everyone has been impacted by a loved one’s addiction. With just a little bit of understanding it is plain to see that it is a sickness not a moral issue.
Legislating morality hasn’t worked really well for our country and it is about time to stop and take inventory of what works and what doesn’t. Prisons can be the trigger that some need to become sober. I am pretty clear that in most cases people return from prison with deeper emotional issues and less coping mechanisms making addiction the easy way out. This begins the vicious cycle all over again.
I say stop the war on drugs and start a new campaigned. Maybe we can call the “light on addiction.” We all know that what we look at disappears and what we resist persists. I am not resisting any longer. I am now assisting, and that is what I encourage you to do. Instead of saying things like “shame on you,” maybe we can start saying things like “I understand you, and I want to help.”
Help me shine the light will you?
(Kevin McCormack, C.A.d ,is a certified addictions professional and Recovery Advocate. He is a recovering addict with 26 years of sobriety. Kevin is a practicing auriculotherapist, recovery coach, and interventionist specializing in individual and family recovery. Kevin has a passion for holistic living, personal awareness training, and physical meditation. You can visit his website Life After Addicton for more information. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
I remember it like it was yesterday. I was very young, maybe eleven or twelve years old, hanging out with a friend at “The Pit.” The Pit, as we called it, was an old foundation of a house that was dug into the ground. We made a makeshift roof out of junk wood and metal we had gathered up from our neighborhood. This became our version of a tree house that we would hang out in and do “kid stuff.”
At this point in our young lives, “kid stuff” was gathering up Playboy magazines and stealing beer and cigarettes from our houses and maybe even some of our neighbors’ houses. (Sorry, Mom and neighbors.) Call it boredom, call it fitting in, call it copying adult behavior, or call it small-town living. Whatever you call it, not every kid did it the same way, so the bottom line is this was just our way.
I was raised Catholic. My family went to church pretty regularly and I attended Sunday School taught by the priest or nuns. My brother was an altar boy, and I choose to follow in his footsteps. I really think I did it because sitting in church was murderously boring, and at least being an altar boy gave me a job and a purpose for being there.
I certainly listened to the teaching. Again, some of it did not interest me much and other parts of it were just confusing. I did, however, learn that good people went to heaven and bad people went to hell. This seemed to be the crux of every fable, story, or parable that we examined. I also learned that the lines were sketchy, at best, of what was the difference between “good” and “bad.” There were some behaviors that the teaching was pretty clear on, though. And by the time I was a pre-teen, I had already done some of the “bad” ones.
Now, I don’t know if the church was clear on the whole “forgiveness of sins” thing, or perhaps I didn’t pay very close attention to that part, but I was pretty sure that there was a good chance that I was doomed to hell at an early age. And to be really honest, I didn’t care. If I am going to be completely candid here, I will admit that I never really cared for the whole “born in sin” thing. In fact, it really made me kind of mad.
Back to that day in “The Pit.” My friend and I had just found a new thing to do. I do not remember who, what, or where we got the idea from, but we decided to crush a bunch of No Doz tablets up and snort them. I clearly remember us saying “since I’m going to hell anyway.”
I would like to be really clear here that I do not blame my religious upbringing on my decision to practice risky behaviors like abusing drugs. The point I am trying to make here is that I believe that my young mind rejected the idea of my being born in sin. The term “sin,” to me, meant “bad.” So if all people where born “bad,” what is the point of that? What message does that send to someone of that age? Or for any age, for that matter?
Here is where your personal power can be experienced: Stop calling yourself bad, stop labeling your behavior as bad, stop judging others’ behaviors as bad. Look at things and see if they are producing the outcome which you desire. If not, call them “no longer useful” and move away from them.
Start taking notice of your preferences. There is a huge distinction between “preference” and “addiction.” If your choices are not producing the life you say you want to lead, choose again. Does this sound too good to be true? I assure you it isn’t. And people are doing it all the time. The only thing that limits you is what you think limits you.
The only thing stopping you from making changes in your life is your fear of the unknown. Life is here to conspire with you, not against you. It has been my experience, and the experience of many others, that when we decided to give sobriety a chance, life got better. The Soul offers us unlimited grandeur; the Mind desires to keep things small. The Mind is all about survival; the Soul knows survival is guaranteed.
I choose today to hold beliefs that serve my purpose. Fear-based beliefs no longer work for me. Conversations with God tells us that “obedience is not creation.” I would say that obedience is an escape hatch that we use in order to not be responsible for our choices. I have heard Neale say, “no one ever does anything they do not want to do.” I have placed a great deal of thought into that statement, and I would agree.
“Most people on earth don’t believe in God as God really is because it is just simply too good to be true.” ~ NDW
(Kevin McCormack, C.A.d ,is a certified addictions professional and auriculotherapist. He is a recovering addict with 26 years of sobriety. Kevin is a practicing auriculotherapist, recovery coach, and interventionist specializing in individual and family recovery. Kevin has a passion for holistic living, personal awareness training, and physical meditation. You can visit his website Life After Addicton for more information. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
In early recovery, the old-timers will tell you, “Take the cotton out of your ears and stick it in your mouth.“ This is not bad advice for the newly sober person, as listening is a lost art for people in general, not solely for the newcomer in sobriety. But I had ideas and desires, along with enthusiasm, yet not very much patience.
You see, I wanted to start a Narcotics Anonymous meeting in my town. Oh, we had plenty of Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, and on some nights there were more than two happening at the same time. I had plenty of support in getting sober with the AA people, yet I desired something different. I had been to NA meetings while I was in rehab and really resonated with the people and message being offered there. For me, it was just something that I wanted to do and I set out to do so.
When I began asking around as to how I should go about starting a meeting, I was told by everyone that I needed to wait until I had more clean time under my belt before taking on such a project. I didn’t understand, but I did accept what I was being told. I gave the old-timers the respect they had earned and did not want to endanger my sobriety. So I set a goal. At 90 days clean, I was going to start the first NA meeting in my home town!
Little did I know at the time that what I was experiencing life in a new way. I had set a goal and now needed to wait for a time set in the future to have it materialize. During the next few weeks, which at the time must have seemed like an eternity, I gathered information and the contacts who would help to make my dream a reality. On or around my 90-day mark in recovery, myself and two others started the Tuesday night “Just For Today“ NA meeting in Port Jervis, New York.
Setting goals and then watching them materialize is foundational work in our spiritual growth. We may begin with small goals and then work up to bigger plans. As more and more of our dreams and desires materialize, we begin to believe that the universe is a friendly place willing to support us. Remembering to give thanks to those who help us along, along with being grateful to life for supporting us, brings about a state of being that is positive and uplifting.
Setting goals is pure creation. Tell the universe what it is you wish to do and watch it line up just the perfect people and circumstances for you to experience just that. It happens all the time to everybody. If you are not experiencing this, there can only be two reasons:
1. You are not finished yet. Never give up, never quit. Many times we cave in to defeat moments before victory is at our hands.
2. You have set the goals but there is some thought or action that is sending out a message that is either negating the original message or delaying the manifestation.
So dream big, and small. Don’t be afraid to fail, because you simply cannot fail. Failure is quitting before the miracle. Do something each day to move yourself and the universe in the direction you wish it to go. If you find yourself thinking in a negative way about your goal, remember that thought is energy and the universe responds in kind. Believe in yourself, believe in others, and ultimately be thankful in advance for the successful completion to your ideas.
(Kevin McCormack, C.A.d ,is a certified addictions professional and auriculotherapist. He is a recovering addict with 26 years of sobriety. Kevin is a practicing auriculotherapist, recovery coach, and interventionist specializing in individual and family recovery. Kevin has a passion for holistic living, personal awareness training, and physical meditation. You can visit his website Life After Addicton for more information. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
A person named “Wendy” wrote to tell me of an ad she saw on television. In this ad the person states, “I was an addict for 10 years, now I am not.” Wendy wanted to know how could someone claim such a thing when everyone knows, “once an addict, always and addict.” Here was my reply:
There are many paths to enlightenment and there are many ways to recover from addiction. I, for one, do not call myself an addict anymore. I find that labels tend to attract their own definition into our reality. I do say that I am a person in long term recovery from addiction. The distinction is that I am fully aware of the power of the disease of addiction and the cunning nature of the human mind. I have accepted that I have little to no control over mind and mood altering chemicals when they are in my system. Therefore, I do not partake in the lifestyle or activities that include drugs and alcohol in them.
So, for this person to say they are not an addict doesn’t concern me. A tiger always has stripes though even if we change its name. Watching the behavior and actions of another is the true definition of who they are. If they say they are not an addict and live a clean life they are in recovery. If they say they are not an addict and continue to do drugs and alcohol and exhibit the behaviors associated with addiction then they are just in denial.
Recovery to me is more than abstinence. It is a way of life, a way that includes self discovery, a softening of the personal agenda of life and a growing desire to lift others to greater heights. Recovery is about examining our behaviors and our beliefs and bringing them into alignment with who we wish to be. Recovery is a decision to face life on life’s terms.
So how do you help someone who is in denial about their addiction?
Well, if they are still exhibiting addictive behaviors you refuse to play the game. You speak from a place of authenticity and you tell them your truth. In Conversations with God it is said that “Yet despots cannot be allowed to flourish, but must be stopped in their despotism. Love of Self, and love of the despot, demands it.”
Addiction and despotism are of course not the same thing, yet the goal should be the same for all of us who claim to be loving beings. We should desire for each person to experience themselves in the next highest version of the grandest vision ever held.
Being vocally unwilling to enable the addict and refusing to take part in the lies, deception, and depravity of the disease is the best way to help someone who is experiencing it. They may cast you out of their life, but the pain of turning away someone they love for a substance will eat away at their conscience. Pain stacked up on top of pain will drive the addict to the tipping point we refer to as “the bottom.” The bottom is the place where the pain of using the substance is greater than the pain of facing up to who we have been.
The 12-Steps of anonymous programs work for some and not for others. There are other methods of recovery that work as well. Desire to recover and change is what it all boils down to. I am not going to advocate programs that claim to be able to help people modify their usage. I personally feel that is a path that all addicts have tried on their own with no success.
Alcohol is not something that is needed our useful to the human body. Anyone who claims to truly love themselves would never ingest even a drop of alcohol. I also believe the same to be true for other drugs. A person who is working on becoming more self aware, and returning to love, would be best served by being mindful food and chemicals they put into their bodies.
I would like to close this article with the “new Gospel” of CwG.
We are all one. Ours is not a better way, it is merely another way.
(Kevin McCormack, C.A.d ,is a certified addictions professional and auriculotherapist. He is a recovering addict with 26 years of sobriety. Kevin is a practicing auriculotherapist, recovery coach, and interventionist specializing in individual and family recovery. Kevin has a passion for holistic living, personal awareness training, and physical meditation. You can visit his website Life After Addicton for more information. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
The end result of judgment is condemnation. Human beings feel the need to judge others as a means of justifying their own moral compass. I understand how deeply ingrained this process is in all of us. From the earliest age, we are taught this distorted truth. I am not entirely sure why we don’t trust the moral compasses of our individual children to be expressed and experimented with on their own, yet my eyes see that most of the time we do not.
I do wish, believe, and hope that as we evolve as a species we will begin to trust that our children are here on a soul journey of their own and they are fully capable of determining what their own belief system is.
Kahlil Gibran wrote:
“Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.”
My thoughts today are on the drug-related death of actor Philip Seymour Hoffman. Much has been said by media and fans as well as others who are comfortable expressing their comments in media articles. The expressions are as wide and diverse as you would imagine on this very difficult-to-understand topic.
There are those who say we should sympathize with Philip’s losing battle with addiction and those who say fooey on addiction, he was a degenerate druggie who got what he deserved. Whatever your take on this is, I feel it is important to dialogue about it. The thing I notice is that for every opinion, there seems to be a lack of willingness to expand our individual perspective about drugs and addiction.
I get that drug use is not easy for the non-user to understand. I don’t ask those people to offer up any sympathy or expect any helping hand from them. But why is the judgment and condemnation necessary? Why make it personal? What is it that causes someone who believes that addicts are just morally corrupt degenerates to stoop to name-calling and viciousness?
These very same people who look down on the heroin user may have more sympathy for an alcoholic or person who smokes cigarettes. There is literally no difference. More people die today from prescription drug overdoses than of illegal narcotics. Alcohol is the single most offensive chemical to the human race, and it is legal!
Just to remind you, CwG Book 1,
“And if you’ve ever taken alcohol into your body, you have very little will to live. The body was not meant to intake alcohol. It impairs the mind.” Alcohol, prescription or illegal drugs (yes, pot included.) God, although with no judgment, clearly tells us the path to self-awareness is through keeping a clear and unimpaired mind.”
It is my vision that someday our best chances for ridding humanity from the scourge of addiction will be the understanding of the root cause of addiction.
I believe that the book Communion with God could offer us the way to make my vision a reality. When our children are gently guided to their own truths instead of us ushering down the data that was passed down to us by our elders, maybe then we can start making some inroads.
Genetics seems to play some role in addiction, as does environment and the sheer addictiveness of some drugs. But what is really going on is that the majority of humans have no understanding of who they are, what they are here for, or where we are from. We have made it up that we are here to learn something, or to do something. But what is always missing is the part where we BE something. Most people never even hear this concept.
I take the road of weeping the drug-related death of Mr. Hoffman. I believe that he chose this departure time and method. Not because he was selfish, or uncaring. He chose this because humanity needed the exposure that he could give to the disease of addiction. Some say, “How could he leave those 3 children behind without a father?” I can see how they would say that, from the limited perspective of the mind; yet the soul knows the bigger picture. The soul understands that time is only a construct of the human condition. I also believe that the co-creation cannot be understood by the mind.
The human mind looks at someone who is sad and sees something “wrong.” The Soul looks at sadness with joy, for it is truly the physical expression for love. Yes, some will carry painful baggage away from this human event. Yet others will carry life experience away that otherwise could not have been had.
I am going to close this blog with food for thought. The following conversation from CwG, Book 2, caused me to think deeply about events that occur and what they may mean to me and society as a whole. I would really enjoy having a dialogue about this:
“God: There is only one of you, but you are much larger than you think!
Neale: So when the “me” that exists now” changes something he doesn’t like about his “future,” the “me” that exists in the “future” no longer has that as part of his experience?
God: Essentially yes. The whole mosaic changes. But he never loses the experience he’s given himself. He’s just relieved and happy that “you” don’t have to go through that.”
(Kevin McCormack, C.A.d ,is a certified addictions professional and auriculotherapist. He is a recovering addict with 26 years of sobriety. Kevin is a practicing auriculotherapist, recovery coach, and interventionist specializing in individual and family recovery. Kevin has a passion for holistic living, personal awareness training, and physical meditation. You can visit his website Life After Addicton for more information. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
Having been there myself and having met so many others who are there as well, the one message that really needs to be sent out to those who are battling with addictions is: You are not bad; you are a spiritual being choosing a human experience called addiction. And guess what? You can choose again, right here, right now. You can decide to be a person who in the past struggled with addiction.
There is a viral letter going around Facebook right now that is finding its way into many people’s lives, and I would like to share that message with you here in this column today because I find it to be a very important piece of knowledge for people suffering through the hardship of addiction.
The following was written by a woman named Courtney A. Walsh.
“Dear Human: You’ve got it all wrong. You didn’t come here to master unconditional love. That is where you came from and where you’ll return. You came here to learn personal love. Universal love. Messy love. Sweaty love. Crazy love. Broken love. Whole love. Infused with divinity. Lived through the grace of stumbling. Demonstrated through the beauty of… messing up —- often. You didn’t come here to be perfect. You already are. You came here to be gorgeously human. Flawed and fabulous. And then to rise again into remembering. But unconditional love? Stop telling that story. Love, in truth, doesn’t need ANY other adjectives. It doesn’t require modifiers. It doesn’t require the condition of perfection. It only asks that you show up. And do your best. That you stay present and feel fully. That you shine and fly and laugh and cry and hurt and heal and fall and get back up and play and work and live and die as YOU. It’s enough. It’s plenty.”
There are two specific parts to this letter that I find to be powerful and healing. The first is that our love can be demonstrated through “messing up.” In the writing of CWG, God makes it clear in his message:
“Taken to ultimate logic, you cannot experience yourself as what you are until you’ve encountered what you are not. This is the purpose of the theory of relativity, and all physical life. It is by that which you are not that you yourself are defined.”
It is pretty clear that active addiction is not ultimately who we really are. For most of us, our behavior impacted others negatively, criminally, selfishly, and even ruthlessly. All of these things we have done out of the distorted view of love we have. Some feel the bar of morality is set to high for them to achieve, others do not feel worthy of love. The one thing I am more sure of now than ever is that we are all worthy of love, regardless of our past.
When in the depths of addictive behavior, we are always one decision away from freedom. We can “rise again into remembering,” as Courtney points out in her letter, “You didn’t come here to be perfect, you already are.” You did come here to experience life and realize your wholeness. We tend to forget this or simply haven’t awakened to this yet. Maybe the message hasn’t been delivered in just the right way for you to hear it. It is my hope that this column can send that message.
The second part of this “Dear Human” letter that strikes a chord within me is this: “It (love) doesn’t require the condition of perfection. It only asks that you show up.” In fact you are showing up. You can’t not show up for life. You can, however, check out of life. And active addiction is just that, checking out. Making a decision to give life a chance without your addiction gives you the opportunity to “show up” as a more complete version of who you really are.
In CWG Book 1, God calls what we are doing here Re-membering. And it is we who choose this remembering. And choosing to remember who we really are is a pure act of creation. So why not put to rest the current story you are telling about who you are and awaken to the next grandest version of you? Have you not experienced the darkness of addiction enough? Are you aware that enough is enough when you say it is? You are not powerless, you are not a victim, you are God living a human experience.
Your awakening will not be without reward. Life after addiction is filled with many gratifying experiences. The beauty of the light after living in the darkness has been experienced by millions of people who are living long-term recovery. The journey of many recovering people has included joining together to support one another and ultimately share their gifts with other like-minded people.
“Your job on Earth, therefore, is not to learn (because you already know), but to remember Who You Are. And to re-member who everyone else is. That is why a big part of your job is to remind others (that is, to re-mind them), so that they can remember also. All the wonderful spiritual teachers have been doing just that. It is your sole purpose. That is to say, your soul purpose.” CWG Book 1.
*Courtney A. Walsh can be found easily through Google by searching for “Dear Human.” The original intent from Courtney was for this to be “the seed of an empowerment movement for suicide prevention and bullying awareness.”
(Kevin McCormack, C.A.d ,is a certified addictions professional and auriculotherapist. He is a recovering addict with 26 years of sobriety. Kevin is a practicing auriculotherapist, recovery coach, and interventionist specializing in individual and family recovery. Kevin has a passion for holistic living, personal awareness training, and physical meditation. You can visit his website Life After Addicton for more information. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
The grand announcement: “I am quitting drinking once and for all!” How many times are you allowed to say “once and for all”? I know I’ve said it a bunch of times for a variety of different obsessions, compulsions, and addictions, not to mention bad relationships and the occasional snooze-button triathlon! Quitting, for me and many others, just doesn’t seem to work.
One of the most difficult aspects of making drastic changes in our thinking and doing is getting past the pre-wired thinking in our heads. We can’t simply state we are not going to keep doing a behavior that we have engrained in our pattern for many years by saying we are not going to do it anymore. No, it takes much more than that. What needs to happen for a successful transition is a deep commitment, a plan, and support of those who love us.
“Conversations with God” states, “The moment you declare anything, everything unlike it will come into the space.” This is known as the law of opposites. It is the universe, or our soul, or our patterned brain, saying “how bad do you really want this?” This process becomes a huge stumbling block in the life of an addicted or compulsive person. We crave the reward of the object of our obsession and the question from the unknown sets off an internal belief that we need the thing to survive.
This warped survival instinct causes the addicted to fall into the trap time and time again. But the power and glory that is derived from answering the universe with a resounding “yes, I am sure” cannot be understated. The law of opposites is in place for a very good reason. This law is the springboard to our physical, emotional, and spiritual evolution. We could not make that leap without it.
The law of opposites presents the perfect opportunity for us to take full responsibility for our choices. All too often we choose the smaller choice, the painful yet comfortable choice, instead of pushing back on our craving.
So what is this law of opposites and why does it appear to conflict with the law of attraction, you may ask? The law of opposites is simply providing a contextual field for our true desires to be experienced. We cannot know the joy and the power of stepping into a new creation without the resistance that this law provides. Life is meant to be experienced, and the only way to do so is for the opposite of our desires to be present to show us the way.
For more on the law of opposites and the law of attraction, I suggest reading the book Happier than God.
The application of this knowledge is crucial in overcoming addiction, obsessions, and compulsions. Why? It requires that one put faith in something outside of themselves. We must first believe that what is working for others can work for us. Then we have to put trust in something that is unseen. When we experience the reward of this blind faith, we begin to build upon it.
Surrendering our destructive ways for the promise of better days and better ways is truly a difficult task in the human experience. Many do not understand the plight of the addicted. All of life’s maladies call to us to face the law of opposites. Addiction is merely another hardship that we face so that we may fully experience the darkness so that we can eventually know that we are so much more than that.
I would like to extend the invitation to those who are inspired to write a blog on addiction and recovery to contact me with your vision. The column must reflect the messages of new spirituality.
(Kevin McCormack, C.A.d ,is a certified addictions professional and auriculotherapist. He is a recovering addict with 26 years of sobriety. Kevin is a practicing auriculotherapist, life coach, and interventionist specializing in individual and family recovery and also co-facilitates spiritual recovery retreats for the CWG foundation. You can visit his website Life After Addicton for more information. To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@TheGlobalConversation.com)
