The Global Conversation

Category: Somebody Asked Me

  • If you think it’s a sign, it is a sign.

    I have a question about signs. I was in a relationship and always noticed my boyfriend’s first name everywhere…also the word “ring.” I kept thinking to myself why ring..I didn’t see him proposing?? Then I would see a wedding ring…odd. We broke up and I wish him the best, but just this week it started all over again. It has been a year!!!I feel like I am nuts. It doesn’t make sense. Is this a sign or something else?  Because I am confused.  ~T.

    Dear T.,

    If you think it is a sign, it is a sign. But a sign of what?

    You could go into the creative, romantic side of you and think that it means he’s thinking of you, and that is certainly possible. It might, and I believe more probably, mean that you are thinking of him and haven’t yet resolved your issues around him and the ring.

    Which leads me to a small discussion on preferences vs. expectations. Culturally, we are taught to expect the ring, so we go into a relationship with a very narrow focus of what it should look like…expectation. Only one way of fulfilling the vision. Preference, on the other hand, says that the ring would be nice, but that you know there are other ways of having a good relationship, and that you are open to any way that shows itself, and that is mutually agreeable.

    Then, perhaps, these are signs that you should look at what is actually true about the relationship, based on what you actually experienced and witnessed, rather than the story you made up about those things. Just as a short example:

    Fact: He left me.

    Story: He broke my heart, he doesn’t love me, he thinks that I am the worst person in the world.  (I’m making this up, of course, because I know nothing about your breakup.)

    T., it’s up to you to decide what the sign means. It could be as simple as you asking you to make up your mind about what you really feel. It could be he’s thinking of you. Or it could be something else entirely! I absolutely believe that God talks to us constantly, through little signs all day long. I also believe that if we “listen” through the body, via that old tummy test, we will actually know what the conversation is about!

    Find a quiet place, sit down, think about the things you have just read, and see how they feel in your tummy.

    Therese

    (Therese Wilson is the administrator of the global website at www.ChangingChange.net, which offers spiritual assistance from a team of Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less, and offers insight, suggestions, and companionship during moments of unbidden, unexpected, unwelcome change on the journey of life. She may be contacted at Therese@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com, where our team is waiting to hear from you.)


  • How does God feel about sex before marriage?

    I am scared and confused, and I wish someone would tell me what is the REAL DEAL about how God feels about sexual intimacy between people who love each other but aren’t married yet. I am caught between the Bible and what CWG has to say. From what I have read of CWG, God seems very easy going about sex. The Bible implies (and sometimes firmly states) that sexual purity is a must and that God won’t hear the prayers of someone who is sexually immoral. But, I’m not trying to be immoral. I just want to love and be loved by the person of my choice. Why is that bad? My friendship with God means everything to me. He is my best friend and He has walked with me my whole life. I don’t want to feel like I am betraying him by being disobedient. All I want is to do the right thing. Can you give me your perspective? Thank you, Annie, for listening… Frances

    Dear Frances…Thank you for reaching out. You asked for the “REAL DEAL about how God feels about sexual intimacy between people who love each other but aren’t married yet.”

    Okay, here it is: God = Love. God is all there is, everywhere present, in all things seen and unseen. Love is all there is, everywhere present, in all things seen and unseen (even though it’s hard to recognize sometimes, when it’s been distorted by fear).

    Since God is all there is, and Love is all there is, how can any expression of Love between two people possibly be bad? It cannot, dear Frances. Love wants to be expressed, and that’s what we came here to physicality for. YOU get to decide what feels right for you, and no matter what decision you make, please know that God loves you and is perfectly okay with it. God will never abandon you. It is impossible for the reason stated above: You are part of God, because God is all there is.

    Please allow yourself to feel pure joy. Allow yourself to live your own truth. And always, allow yourself to feel love, in whatever way feels joyous and true to you!

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com.

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • Am I a Lemon?

    I’m beginning to think that there’s something wrong with me.  Things that come easily to those around me are hard for me, and every time I try the latest and greatest thing that a friend swears by, I’m frustrated and disappointed because it doesn’t work for me.  This happens anywhere from money and career to the latest self-help craze or dieting and I’m beginning to think I’m a “lemon.”  I’m generally optimistic, I have a positive attitude and an open mind – is there something I’m just not getting here?? 

    Becky, Vancouver

    Hi Becky,

    No, you are most certainly not a lemon, and there is nothing wrong with you.  It’s easy to watch another person do something and find success and assume that we will, too, only to find ourselves frustrated and wondering, “what am I doing wrong?”  For instance, one person may start a new diet program and lose 20 lbs. on it.  Another person sees this and tries the program herself, and doesn’t lose a thing.  What’s the problem here?  The answer is something you probably already know on some level – the answer is that each one of us is a unique individual, and we all work differently.

    Seems like common sense, right?  Yet how many times do we find ourselves forcing ourselves to fit into different constructs anyway, just because it works for someone else, all the while knowing this answer?  We do this because we are taught to.  We are taught to fit in, be a part of the norm, conform, etc., and the ironic part is that we’re taught this because it’s supposed to be easier, when, in fact, it makes life much more difficult if these “norms” are not your true nature.  We end up fighting ourselves, going against our natural “grain,” and life feels just plain hard sometimes.

    But what if we made a conscious choice to embrace the unique things about ourselves, and the unique way in which we work?  What if you made a conscious effort to work with yourself instead?  Oh, the possibilities…

    And here are a few ways to get you started:

    –  Pay attention to what works for you and doesn’t work for you.  How do you know?  Things that feel good, come easily to you, and you look forward to work for you.  Things that bring a lot of resistance, anxiety, struggle, and even fear probably don’t work for you.

    –  Avoid the things that don’t work for you and embrace the things that do.  It’s as simple as that, but it takes some focus and listening to yourself.  Try writing things down as you notice them, and referring back to your lists as reminders when making decisions.

    –  Get into the habit of centering yourself.  When you are closely and strongly connected to your Self, everything naturally becomes clearer, and you’ll find yourself making choices based on what you’re naturally drawn to versus what you think you “should” do.  So do whatever works for you, meditate, journal, go for walks, paint, etc.; whatever brings you that calm inner peace and clarity.

    Start there, and it will be amazing at how much easier and more enjoyable your life becomes, not to mention how much more fun it is to be YOU.  And remember to celebrate the things that make you different – if we were all the same, the world wouldn’t be nearly as interesting.

    (Nova Wightman is a CWG Life Coach, as well as the owner and operator of Go Within Life Coaching, www.gowithincoaching.com, specializing in helping individuals blend their spirituality with their humanity in a way that makes life more enjoyable, easy, and fulfilling.  She can be reached at Nova@TheGlobalConversation.com. )

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to: Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com, where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • Your Children Have to Live Their Own Lives

    Dear Editor…My son is falling into a group that uses drugs on a regular basis. This is not just youthful “experimentation,” this is serious drug abuse, as far as I am concerned. I have talked with him about it, but he keeps telling me not to worry, that he can take care of himself, and has no intention of becoming “addicted” to drugs. What can I do here? Are there any “spiritual truths” that might help me in this situation — or help him? I suppose I should tell you, he is 22 years old…but that doesn’t make him feel any less my worry or my concern.

    — Priscilla

    Dear Priscilla,

    The greatest gift a parent can give their children, and the hardest one for the parent to give, is letting them live their own lives. Especially when it is going in a direction that, to us, is clearly not the journey that we would want them to take. At 22, he is certainly on his own journey.

    There are no wrong paths, Priscilla, and I would like to suggest to you that your son is taking this path for two reasons. First, because this is the way he is experiencing what he chose, on a soul level, to experience. Secondly, so that you, and others, could choose your own experience through what he is doing right now.

    I am not saying that, Priscilla, from a flippant space. I have someone very special to me who is a recovering addict. For him, it took many years and many hard roads, including prison. We had a talk about his path recently, and he said that there was nothing I could have done that would have stopped him…until he was ready to stop. What he did say, that was most interesting to me, was that every word of advice that my husband and I gave him was heard! He said that he couldn’t truly hear them until he was sober, but then they became powerful.

    You haven’t indicated that your son is an addict, and I don’t want to suggest that he is, but the advice I would give you is the same. Talk to him. Don’t talk to him from your judgment, talk to him from your love. It is okay to tell him you are worried about him, it is not okay to tell him you think he is bad. Tell him you love him.

    If he knew who he really was, he wouldn’t be doing what he is doing. To help him know this, you might give him a copy of “Conversations With God” Book 1, but just give it to him gently and let him know it is okay if he doesn’t read it until he is ready to. Priscilla, you may also wish to have personal support, and if you feel so drawn, you might consider going to www.ChangingChange.net where you can share your journey and get practical and spiritual suggestions. The site is based on the book, “When Everything Changes, Change Everything”, and it is available, in total, to read on the site. There are, of course, many other resources available to both of you.

    Then let him have his own journey. It may never be one you understand, but, Pricilla, it will never be a “wrong” journey. This life is not the end of the experience as individuations of Divinity. Your task is to have your own journey, that, hopefully, includes finding a way to communicate to your son that his journey is the more difficult one, and that there is a way that works better. My journey included telling my special someone that I would no longer witness his self destruction. I told him that I understood that no one would consciously choose this road, and that I loved him, but staying on the road with him was not helping him, and was harming me, and others that I loved.

    Priscilla, communicate your fears, but don’t let judgment enter the conversation. Suggest, but don’t dictate. Let your son know your love. Then, no matter how long or short the journey through drugs he must take, be there when he comes out the other side. Then tell him you will always be his mother. I know that the seeds of love that I sowed took 15 years, but they grew into a magnificent man!

    Therese

     (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com, where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

    (Therese Wilson is the administrator of the global website at www.ChangingChange.net, which offers spiritual assistance from a team of Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less, and offers insight, suggestions, and companionship during moments of unbidden, unexpected, unwelcome change on the journey of life. She may be contacted at Therese@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

     

  • Can I make myself love someone?

    What happens if you simply do not feel love for a certain person (even if it’s a spouse or mother). The feeling of “love” is just not there. Do you act as if you do or convince yourself that you do love them even though you don’t feel it until you do feel it? You can care for a person and don’t want any harm to them, but just don’t “love” them. Perhaps I have the wrong perception of what love is or can be. I love my two children to death (figure of speech); therefore, I know what feeling love is. What are your thoughts as I’m struggling with this.  Blessings, Lyne 

    Dear Lyne…My mother has always said we love in many different ways. I don’t love my sister the same way that I love my father. I don’t love a former sweetheart the same way I love my husband. I don’t even love my favorite cat Pippin the same way I love our kitten, Beanie! This is because each and every one of us is unique.

    I also think it’s entirely possible to love someone at an intellectual level, but not like them, or at least, not like their actions or their way of being in the world. Remember, we are vibratory beings.  And just as in music, vibrations either resonate and or they’re dissonant. When two vibrations resonate, they flow harmoniously together, but when two vibrations are dissonant, it feels quite uncomfortable. It might help you to understand, though, that just because certain wave forms may not resonate with each other, it doesn’t make either one of them “bad.”  Sometimes our vibes just don’t jibe!

    I’m sorry if this isn’t the answer you want to hear about your spouse, but I learned the hard way (after a long seven-year relationship) that I couldn’t force myself to feel romantic love. I loved the guy “to death,” to use your words, thinking that I would eventually fall in love with him, but it never happened. Our bond was loyal and deep and full of love, just not that kind of love. The chemistry was just not there and I couldn’t will it to happen, no matter how much I wanted to. Perhaps other people are different, but I know I’ll never go down that road again. Thankfully, we parted in the kindest, most loving way possible.  And after enough healing time, we ended up remaining the dear friends we were all along… thank God!

    Now, in the case of your mother, who you are expected to spend some amount of time with throughout your life, it may indeed, behoove you to act as if you love her if you want to spare her feelings, but always “to thine own self be true.” You either feel love for her or you don’t, and it doesn’t make you a bad daughter if you don’t. Give yourself the breathing room you need in the relationship and forgive yourself for your feelings if you haven’t done so already. If you think you can be with her from time to time in a positive way, you might feel good about doing that, especially for her sake, but I would make the phone calls or visits brief enough that you stay happy throughout the encounters. It wouldn’t serve either of you if the visits are so long they begin to deteriorate.

    I hope this helps, Lyne. If you need more personal assistance with this, please feel free to call on one of us CWG Life Coaches. The first session is always free. You can find out more about this opportunity by following this link here:

    Conversations with God Life Coaches

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of The Conversations With God School, is a CWG Life Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com.

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • Easily Influenced By Negativity of Others

    I’m finding it really hard to maintain my inner peace and balance around negative people and circumstances, and it’s particularly hard right now with the whole political divide thing – people are downright mean right now!  My question is, how do I stop being so affected by the negative energy of those around me?

    Sarah, Wisconsin

    Hi Sarah,

    The answer to your question lies in your own alignment and connection with yourself, as well as where you are focusing your attention.  In short, when our attention is placed within, nothing “without” or outside of us can harm us.  This isn’t just spiritual fluff, talk to any person who consciously practices and makes going within a priority, they’ll tell you they are a lot less influenced by the thoughts, words and actions of others.  And when you allow yourself to spend more time paying attention to the negativity around you, reading about it, listening to people who complain a lot or are negative, etc. more than you are focusing on going within yourself, yes, inner peace and balance does indeed become jeopardized.  There are many approaches to this, as you can imagine, but I’m going to offer you the most direct and effective one that I am aware of, and that is to: a) engage in daily practices and surround yourself with people and resources that support and are in alignment with who you really are, and b) be very aware (and honest) about where you’re allowing your attention to be placed.

    The daily practices part is huge – if you are not giving yourself this gift already, I urge you to do so immediately.  Miraculous things come from this alone.  Meditating, journaling, practicing daily gratitude, yoga, etc. are all wonderful ways to “go within” and connect with who you really are.  But the real magic of this lies not in what you are doing but in the commitment, consistency and discipline of engaging in these practices each and every single day.  I wake up before my husband and daughter each day, and trust me I am not a morning person, just so I can make sure I get my practices in.  I do this because I see how it impacts the flow of the rest of my day, as well as how I show up in it and how I interact with others.  And when I don’t do it, or skip a day or two, I feel it.  In other words, I notice I am more easily influenced by others and find it more difficult to maintain a sense of peace and balance.

    Also, get into the habit of asking yourself if where you are currently placing your attention is serving you.  And if it’s not, consciously choose to shift your focus.  I know there has been a lot of disagreement and negativity on facebook, for example, so much so that people are even “un-friending” those who hold different political viewpoints.  If you’re reading these posts and are noticing that it doesn’t feel good to read them, it’s in fact messing with your bliss, then simply stop reading them.  It really can be that simple.

    Try these two things, Sarah, and I bet you will begin to see a difference immediately.  Good luck and enjoy!

    Nova

    (Nova Wightman is a CWG Life Coach, as well as the owner and operator of Go Within Life Coaching, www.gowithincoaching.com, specializing in helping individuals blend their spirituality with their humanity in a way that makes life more enjoyable, easy, and fulfilling.  She can be reached at Nova@theglobalconversation.com. )

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to: Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com, where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • Do you create your own reality? Yes, and kind of!

    I keep hearing that I am “creating my own reality.” Yet things happen in my life right and left that I do not want, have never wished for, and certainly am not actively choosing to create. Why is this occurring, and how can I get it to stop?

    — Elizabeth S., Davenport, Iowa

    Dear Elizabeth,

    Creating our own reality.  Yup, that’s being thrown around a lot these days, isn’t it?  Neale  Donald Walsh has said that he believes this notion is one of the most dangerous things being put out there by the New Thought community these days, in fact.  Why?  Because no one really explains what this means.

    Do you create your own reality?  Yes, and kind of!  I will begin with “kind of”.  Life, as we live it, and experience it, in form and function, is never completely our creation.  Life is a co-creation.  All who have any connection to an event, great or small, co-created that event to give each the opportunity to experience something for Divinity.  Of course, this is on a soul level.  It is also assuming that you believe that we are all here, in this reality, so that Divinity may experience what Divinity knows.

    It’s like we are all building a sky scraper together.  Each of us is in charge of one piece of the whole, and we are doing our very best to do our part as well as we are trained to do it.  Then there is an earthquake, and the skyscraper falls down.  Perhaps one of the builders was lax in their job and can take some responsibility for the skyscraper being vulnerable, but no one created the earthquake that revealed that/those vulnerabilities, and no one person can take responsibility for everything.

    The events of the building and the collapsing of the skyscraper did, however, create the situation in which you ARE responsible for creating your own reality.  How did you feel about and during each situation?  Did you get up eagerly to go to work and do your job?  Did you drag out of bed and curse each moment on the job?  Were you sad when the building fell?  If your job might have created the weakness, did you take responsibility?  Did you fall into fear and depression?  And on and on.

    Everyone who had anything to do with that skyscraper, from beginning to end, including observers and reporters, and cleanup crews and people who read about the accident 10 years later, has co-created the skyscraper and its events so that each can experience what THEY choose, on a soul level, to experience through that event.

    CWG says that everything is presenting us with the opportunity to decide, declare and do who we really are.

    Elizabeth, I am really sorry that you are experiencing so much in your life that you do not desire.  You ask how you can get it to stop.  I have a suggestion.

    Change your mind about these events.

    Don’t look at them as things that oppose you and your desires.  Consider looking at them as opportunities to be who you really are.  Then do something else that, in our culture today, seems very counterintuitive.  Be grateful for it all.

    I have found that by moving into gratitude, I move away from being stuck in the emotions that hold my feet to the ground, and prevent me from moving forward.  I acknowledge that I had every right to be sad, or mad or whatever, but that now it is time to see these things as signals that something isn’t really working, and thank them for being in my life.

    I can now look at my life and see that things I thought were perfectly awful at the time, were placed in my life so that some time in the future I could use the experience to help myself or others from a higher knowing.  Mostly the worse I perceived the incident to be, the more I found I was able to use my knowing from that incident to help others that much more powerfully.

    You can not, and do not create your world all by yourself, Elizabeth, but you do create your own experience of the event…and you are capable of changing how you do that.  The book, “When Everything Changes, Change Everything”, by Neale Donald Walsch, explains how to do this and gives some very powerful tools to use as well.  If you haven’t read the book, and can’t afford to buy it, it is available to read on the site for free!  And there are volunteer Spiritual Helpers there to be with you as you integrate the process.

    I hope this has helped,

    Therese

     

     

  • How Can I Walk My Talk More?

    I am a really nice, peace-loving, spiritual person at heart, yet sometimes I catch myself reacting in a less than evolved fashion in different life situations.  For example, I get so angry when I encounter bad drivers or people who clearly have no regard for others, and my tendency is to get angry and sometimes even rude, steaming about it for sometimes days afterwards. At the same time I see myself reacting in such ways, I know that it is not who I really am.  How can I walk my talk more, and keep my cool in situations that evoke such instant anger?

    Martha, Los Angeles

     

    Dear Martha,

    First of all, good for you for being aware of a behavior of yours that is not in alignment with who you really are – a lot of people don’t ever even get to that point!  I have got a lovely exercise for you to try, one that I found in the CWG Book 1 Guidebook years ago and that I use with pretty much all of my clients at some point.  Rest assured that this challenge is not unique to you, we all at some point in our lives show up as “less than evolved”, or react harshly to certain situations life throws our way, some of us more than others.   The trick is to not react, but to instead act on it; in other words, decide ahead of time what your new reaction will be.  And there’s a fun and easy way to do this:

    ~ Take out a piece of paper and draw 3 vertical columns.  Title the first column, “Situations That Commonly Occur”, the second column, “My Usual Reaction to It”, and the third column, “My New Reaction”.

    ~ List as many situations you can think of where you find yourself reacting in a way that you don’t like, identifying your usual reaction to it, and then choosing your new reaction, or how you’d like to show up when that situation arises.

    ~ Finally, put it into practice!  The next time you find yourself in one of the situations you’ve identified, choose your new reaction!

    So much of what we experience in life simply calls for awareness and a small turning of our attention, and making conscious choices.  You’ve already got the awareness and attention part down here, now you can enjoy making a conscious new choice based on who you really are, and in my humble opinion, there is no greater joy.

    Now, while I’ve found this exercise to be extremely useful in my clients’ lives as well as my own, it does not account for every situation.  For example, if you’ve got some deep-rooted emotions connected to some of your “usual reactions”, it may serve you to speak with a professional about it, process what you need to process, and finish your unfinished business.  But for many of our daily experiences, habits and patterns, this exercise works like a charm, and begins assisting you in creating more and more experiences that you can be happy with and proud of.  Enjoy!

     

    (Nova Wightman is a CWG Life Coach, as well as the owner and operator of Go Within Life Coaching, www.gowithincoaching.com, specializing in helping individuals blend their spirituality with their humanity in a way that makes life more enjoyable, easy, and fulfilling.  She can be reached at Nova@theglobalconversation.com. )

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to: Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com, where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • Your words really do have energy

    “I am so lonely, and I want so much for someone to love me.  I’ve been trying so hard to be centered and forgiving and understanding of others.  I need someone to understand me for a change.  My friends say that I am too negative and that my words have energy. What do they mean?”  C.L.

    Dear C.L.

    When you are in the situation where it seems like everything you desire from life is being kept from you, it is difficult to see just how words reflect where we are sending our energy.  From a distance, however, one can see where your energy resides. In “want” and “need” and “try.” What we often can not see, when we want and we need, is that we get exactly what we ask for…want and need. There is a quote attributed to Dr. Michael Beckwith, “Trying is failing with self-protected honor.” Always, in reality, honoring the possibility of failing, and not honoring what you are actually doing and desiring.

    C.L., one of the least understood things about the Universe, is that its greatest desire is to give you exactly what you ask for. It has no judgment as to how good or bad it is for your life. It only knows what you are giving your energy to. Are you giving your energy to want and need? Voila! The Universe joyfully gives you want and need!

    (Now, I am not saying that every time we use those words we are going to be asking for want and need. Let me be clear that I know we use all words casually, and they have no impact on what we are energetically asking for.)

    The power of words is by no means simply a personal thing. Since this is the end of a particularly vocal political season here in the United States, let me share my personal observations of the energy of words on a larger group of society.

    During the last election, I was asked if I really believed the words I was hearing. Words like hope, change, “Yes, we can!”  Yes, I did.

    This election I have been asked if those words don’t now ring hollow.

    My answer is that those words still have power. It doesn’t even matter if the person saying them believes them, it matters if the person hearing them believes them. The words “hope and change,” the words “change starts with you and works up,” the words of Ghandi, “Be the change you wish to see,” affected me, and others, greatly. Those words caused me to do things in my own life, and in my own community to make my world a better place, and caused others to do the same thing. Those words caused me to move away from fear and hatred, and the feeling of being divided from my fellow American, and into a powerful, unifying energy, symbolized by those words.

    So, in this election cycle, I look at the power of the words being used. I listen to my body when I hear the words of people who would represent me and my country. Do I feel hopeful and motivated, or do I feel fearful and immobilized? Do I feel I want to reach out to my fellow human being, or do I want to protect myself and my things? Do I look at others as part of Divinity, or do I look at them as opponents and enemies?

    C.L.,  we are all letting the energy of our thoughts and words enter into our every day lives, so you are definitely not alone in not understanding the power of those words. What energy are you sending out most powerfully?  I would suggest you change to words like, wish, hope and prefer…prefer to have a certain thing or outcome, but do not expect anything in any certain way.  This keeps you open to whatever way the Universe wishes to give to you.

    What we also often fail see is that the energy of our words doesn’t stop with us.  From us that energy expands to our family, community, country and our world.

    Most of us are using this power process unconsciously.

    My advice would be to know that we can all change this, and that the change does begin with us.  We can change how we use our words and the thought we have associated with those words.

    In “When Everything Changes, Change Everything” it says:

    “An event is one thing; your reality of it is another. Events are created by conditions and occurrences outside you. Reality is created by conditions and occurrences inside you—in your mind. It is here that events are turned into data, which are turned into truths, which are turned into thoughts, which are turned into emotions, which are turned into experiences, which form your reality.”

    Words, you see, are the expression of our thoughts. If we can make a change, right there in the process, imagine how different our reality might be…personally and globally.

    Therese

     (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com, where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

    (Therese Wilson is the administrator of the global website at www.ChangingChange.net, which offers spiritual assistance from a team of Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less, and offers insight, suggestions, and companionship during moments of unbidden, unexpected, unwelcome change on the journey of life. She may be contacted at Therese@TheGlobalConversation.com.)


  • My boyfriend can’t forgive me and doesn’t trust me anymore

    My boyfriend can’t forgive me because for the first year we dated I never invited him to my apartment. I was embarrassed because his apartment is so much nicer than mine, so I was always making excuses not to have him over. He thinks it was because I was unfaithful and living with another guy but nothing could be further from the truth. I’ve tried to explain it to him but he’s still holding it against me. I love him so much and miss the good times we had together. How can I regain his trust?… Mandy

    Dear Mandy,

    You’ve learned the hard way, I’m afraid, that relationships can’t prosper fully when one is intentionally withholding information from another. That said, if you’ve sincerely apologized and explained your reasons and he still won’t forgive you, it’s probably time you have a heart to heart talk and try to find out what’s really going on with him. Set an intention for clarity and honest, open, peaceful communication. Here are a few talking points that might help get you started:

    The way I see it, and please correct me if I’m wrong, if you haven’t yet forgiven me, it must be for one of these three reasons:

    1. Because I haven’t explained why I did what I did, well enough for you to understand. I’ll gladly try one more time if you want me to.

    2. If I have explained it fully and you understand what I’m saying, but you choose not to believe me, there is nothing I can do about that.

    3. If I have explained it fully and you understand what I’m saying and you do believe me, but you choose to hold and carry a grudge, there is nothing I can do about that, either. 

    Are any of these scenarios true for you or are you using what I did as an excuse because you don’t have the courage to tell me that your feelings about me have changed? Or maybe you never really felt the same way about me that I feel about you?

    CWG says there is nothing to forgive; there is only to understand. God fully understands the reasons behind everything we’ve ever done—what our fears were, what our thought processes were about that fear, and why it drove us to make that “mistake” (of course, there really are no mistakes in the Universe). That is why we need not ask forgiveness from God. Even before we ask it is already given.

    Also, Mandy, we must always understand and forgive ourselves if we expect to receive understanding and forgiveness from others. This is how the Universe works at a metaphysical level—it reflects back our own thoughts about it. So perhaps the larger question is, Have you forgiven yourself?!

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of The Conversations With God School, is a CWG Life Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com.

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)