The Global Conversation

Tag: Conversations with God

  • How to stop flapping in the wind

    Do you ever feel like parenting in the New Spirituality is a little bit like flapping in the wind?  I mean, in Conversations with God, God threw out all the rules and told us how we can truly live!  The new constructs can read more like feel-good, motivational phrases than concepts:

    We are all one!

    God talks to everyone, all the time!

    There’s no such thing as right and wrong!

    There’s nothing you have to!

    It would be understandable if you sometimes felt a little lost and without direction in your parenting.  Within these concepts, if you are ready to receive it, is a wealth of loving guidance on how to parent your children.   Simply start with an open heart and a willingness to connect with God, and the knowledge will follow.  That might even be how you came to this online newspaper, yes?  God, the Universe, Life, The All, whatever name you give to your experience of that thing that defines That Which Is, facilitates everything you need.  May I suggest a starting place, a custom from which you may wish to consider all of your parenting decisions?   Consistency.

    Consistency is a useful habit to adopt in all of your life.  One of the Core Concepts of CwG says, “The Three Basic Principles of Life are Functionality, Adaptability, and Sustainability.”   To simplify, the idea is that you assess your actions to see if they are “working” as a demonstration of who you envision yourself to be (functionality).  If not, you adjust your actions to make them “work” (adaptability).  Then you maintain your new course for as long as it continues to “work” for you (sustainability); always with an eye toward reassessing functionality — and starting the process over again and again.  Even within this concept there is a beautiful consistency:  By acknowledging that we can change our minds about something, and that we are constantly evolving, we have the ability to take action because of it.

    Consistency in your parenting is hard to pin down. It can be as simple as choosing which words you will use or forgo in your household – good, bad, nice, love, hate, etc. — and sticking to it.  It can involve your child’s behaviors.  Do you expect certain behaviors in some situations and other behaviors in other situations without explanation?  Does your child even know what to expect from you? It can involve the types of foods you bring in to your family and how you present them.  Are foods treated differently at times?  Are they sometimes readily available, sometimes special treats, sometimes rewards, and other times off-limits?  How about interactions with others? Do your children see you speak one way to another person and a different way about the same person when he or she isn’t in the room?

    Children get confused by mixed messages, but they are not necessarily confused by change; these are two different things.  A mixed message is when your current actions and words do not agree; while change occurs when your prior and current/future actions are not the same.  You can explain change in a way which would make sense to a child: “XYZ happened, so we changed course.”  But it is harder to explain a mixed message:  “I know I said let’s be nice to people, but I know you saw me be mean to another person.”

    Children can even handle different expectations or requests based on different situations if they are explained ahead of time.  For instance, most children quickly understand the concept of inside versus outside voices and would not use the same voice, routinely, in a restaurant that they do on the playground.  So they begin to understand that there is some internal consistency to a type of situation and that there can be varied consistency across different types of situations.  They can even begin to interpret those situations for themselves through your guidance and example.

    One of your most important roles as a parent, if there is any to be had, is to help your child feel that their world is stable, that they can know what to expect and that their parent(s) are there for them. Consistency can be crucial, then, for children to be able to trust your words and actions so that they will know that you are truly there for them to buffer and help them interpret the world.  Then your children will not feel like they are flapping in the wind.

    (Emily A. Filmore is the Creative Co-Director of www.cwgforparents.com. She is also the author/illustrator of the “With My Child” Series of books about bonding with your child through everyday activities.  Her books are available at www.withmychildseries.com. To contact Emily, please email her at Emily@cwgforparents.com.)

  • I need help moving out of a fearful place

    I am going through a bit of change looking for a job and being scared of my full potential. I just finished my degree in homeopathy and what I would like to do the most now is to practice and help people. First, however, I need to help myself. I need funds to start my clinic (insurance, association membership, place to practice, the list goes on). Fear of failure keeps me procrastinating and in a fearful place. I want to move out of it and I need help… Ava

    Dear Ava… Thank you for reaching out. I can see why it would be very daunting to open a brand new clinic. That’s quite a laundry list of things to do to get started, and looks to be quite expensive! Let’s see, though, if we can address these other fears you’re having that are holding you back, because an acronym for FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real. And as one of our great American presidents, FDR, said, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”

    You say you are scared of your “full potential”, but is full potential anything to be afraid of? Our Soul’s basic desire is to express itself fully, in the grandest version of the greatest vision it ever held about itself. In other words, to reach its Highest Potential. If you really knew and understood the truth of Who You Are, Ava, an aspect of God with its same unlimited power to create anything you desire, I think fear would not be an issue for you.

    And about that “fear of failure”: did you know that Conversations With God says there is no such thing as failure? Anything that looks like a failure is simply Life’s way of course-correcting. When something we’ve planned doesn’t go the way our Mind thinks it should, it can only be because our Soul has a higher plan for our growth, and this is nothing to be afraid of, my dear! The Mind’s information is so very limited, but the Soul knows all, and will never steer us wrong. We may experience disappointment over a perceived failure when it first happens, but given the benefit of time and hindsight, we will always see the blessing and growth it brought us.

    Would it be possible for you to offer your homeopathy services in a clinic that has already been established, so you wouldn’t have to start one from scratch? Or could you start working part-time out of your home, or perhaps in an herbal or whole foods shop, or at a massage or chiropractic clinic? In other words, see if you can find a way to start your practice on a smaller basis. Since you just graduated, it will give you an opportunity to dip your toe in the water and make sure you really love this line of work before jumping in with both feet! I would think you’d need a little practice too, before starting a clinic.

    Fear is just a distortion of the One Emotion – Love. What do you love so much you’re afraid of losing it? Please look deeply at your fears and ask yourself this all-important question about each one of them: IS IT TRUE?

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • I lost the resolve to follow my truth

    I attended a spiritual retreat earlier this year. Afterward, I had all this strength and clarity and felt so strong! I made a decision to leave my husband, which is something I’ve wanted to do for a long time because the marriage was a mistake from the beginning. When I got home I told him, and it felt really good to start living my truth and moving my life in the right direction. But then I lost my resolve and let him talk me out of it, because trying to figure out all the details of a divorce seems overwhelming. I feel terrible because I really don’t want to be with him anymore. How can I get back on track and stay there?… Carly

    Dear Carly,

    It is said that the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. When making a big change in your life, don’t try to figure it all out at once. Just take it one step at a time, thanking God for guiding you every step of the way. Your feelings are your guidance and they come directly from God, via your Soul. God puts them there to guide you toward the most joyous life you can live, but the longer you continue to disregard the feelings that don’t feel good to you, the longer you postpone your joy.

    You already followed the first two steps of Truth-telling: “Tell your truth about yourself to yourself” and “tell your truth about yourself to another”. Yet, you say you’ve wavered in your resolve to act on it. Is it still your truth that you want to leave your husband? Knowing that this is a major decision in your life, please, once again, do some deep Soul searching about it. Then if it is still your truth, you may need to repeat that to your husband, as lovingly and compassionately as you can. You might soften the blow by telling him that relationships don’t ever end—they only change form. Endings can be very hard, so sometimes it’s easier if we think of them as changes, not endings. “We’re changing the way we interact together…”

    The way to stay on track is to stay in touch with your Soul, which knows all. You can’t figure this all out at the level of Mind, because the Mind’s information is so limited. However that works for you—prayer, meditation, yoga, walking in nature, chanting… whatever—make it a top priority every day. Better yet, make every waking moment a conversation with God. Learn to trust the wisdom of the Voice within you, knowing it is Divine Intelligence at work in your life. The more you follow that “still, small voice”, the happier you’ll be. And worry not about your husband, because he also has access to all the wisdom in the world. God is always with him too.

    Last but not least, you might find this mantra helpful as you encounter challenges along the way:

    “Thank you, God, for helping me remember that this problem has already been solved for me.”

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • My Advice on This Christmas Day

    My advice on this Christmas Day is this:

    Be kind to yourself. Let this kindness be the basis from which you experience this day.

    I say this because Christmas is such a difficult day for so many…but it doesn’t have to forever be the day that childhood and youthful buttons get pushed. Create a new “button”. Create the button of understanding. Even if an action or deed from the past, done by you or by another, was anything but welcome or kind, work on thinking about it from a different space.

    That space would be understanding.  From the space of understanding it may be easier to see the hurt child hiding behind the hurtful behavior.  From that space we might be able to understand that “they know not what they do.”  And from that space you may also be able to begin to understand yourself…and  show yourself kindness.

    Who knows what miracles can happen if we move, as a global community, into the space of understanding…perhaps, just perhaps, we would be able to move into what the birth of the child, Jesus, is supposed to symbolize…Peace on Earth, goodwill towards men (and women).

    Therese

  • How can I get over my stage fright?

    Dear Readers…This week’s column is a little different than usual in that I’m sharing my own Advice question I asked in a conversation with God in 2009. The answer I received completely cured me of these fears and I sincerely hope it helps you as well:

    “Will you please help me get to a place of total calm and perfect relaxation and confidence with my singing and speaking, no matter where it is and what the situation is? Thank you in advance for this answer and for helping me to be a conduit for your message with the beautiful talent you have given me.”

    Be still and know. There are no mistakes. You cannot make a mistake. How many times do I have to tell you? How many performances does it take to know? I haven’t failed you yet and I never will. I gave you these gifts for a higher reason. Yes, you love singing, but as long as you are singing for you, you will have these fears. Therefore, don’t do it for yourself. Let this be your gift. No matter how long it takes before a performance, go within, be still and know. When you get to a place of total calm in meditation, allow it, be with it, give it plenty of time, then walk onstage and allow me to come through you. I will not leave you. I cannot leave you. You are my child in whom I am well pleased.

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • Guiltless gift giving

    How do you feel about the gift-buying season? Do you feel a conflict between a wish to shower your child with presents and your desire to be spiritual? Does that necessarily mean eschewing an abundant holiday? Can you find a balance between the two?  Many of us enjoy shopping for our children; and while we are inundated with ads and sales enticing us to spend without limit, we may start to question how buying presents, heaped upon presents, fits in with The New Spirituality.

     As someone who relishes giving gifts, this is a question I have thought about at length. So while I don’t have the answer for you,God just might. Conversations with God makes clear that money, creature comforts, and, yes, even material objects are meant to be enjoyed, not feared or avoided. In the Old Cultural Story, we were convinced that “virtuous” living meant going without. There was great honor bestowed for doing what you loved and expecting little pay in return; why else would the helping professions require higher levels of education yet pay lower wages than, say, the sports or entertainment industry?  It is only because we have tolerated it being that way.

    Conversations with God disagrees.  No “virtue” is gained by denying yourself valuable pay for doing important work about which you feel passionate. Similarly, you don’t have to deny your children abundance in order to curry favor with God; so the conflict in the opening questions is an illusion. The goal, then, becomes keeping those gifts and possessions in perspective – not allowing them to consume or define you (or your children)–and finding your value, inside of you, based on Who You Really Are, rather than by your material possessions.

    A simple way to keep holiday gifts in perspective, within yourself, is to be conscious of the reasons you have for the amount of shopping you do. For instance, if you are living a life of love, it may not be most beneficial to give gifts intended to show others your wealth; instead it might be more beneficial to look at gifts as an opportunity to show the recipient love, while realizing that this is not the only possible way to show that love. Similarly, giving someone gifts because you are trying to get their love and affection might not be as beneficial to your growth as giving gifts because you wish to show your love to them.  If you look at gift-giving as an opportunity to compete, or to do more than others, rather than doing more for others than you have before, you might not be achieving the highest version of the grandest vision you hold about yourself.  If you spend outside of your means, or what is comfortable, you may be causing yourself more stress. Whereas carefully picking meaningful gifts, which you can afford, might allow you to give with pure love rather than having fear, which accompanies spending “too much,” attached to the gift.  Being aware of your gift-giving intentions will allow you to demonstrate pure love to your child.

    You can also directly help your child keep the holidays in perspective.  One way is to remind him that he is a complete, worthwhile being; and that, in concert with the CwG concept There is Enough, he is Enough just by his existence.  Guide your child to an understanding and feeling of gratitude by encouraging her to write thoughtful thank you notes for gifts she receives. Encourage her to share with others by assisting her in making small gifts for other family members.  All of these can help the child understand that the material things are just that…things which we have, not things which we are…and that being Who We Really Are is actually the best gift we can give the world.

    So really, as with all of The New Spirituality, there are no wrong actions, nothing you can do which offends God or makes you a “bad” person. There is only you and your opportunity to embrace gift-giving as one way (not the only way, and not even the most important way) to share your abundance, to express Who You Really Are, Who You Are in relationship to another, and your love for another,  as well as a chance to acknowledge your gratitude for the gifts (both physical and not) you have received.  In this way, you can feel free to spend as much or as little as you choose, be liberated from the trappings of “keeping up with (or doing more than) the Joneses,” and make educated decisions to spend what is comfortable for your family (whether that means zero or 100 presents) without guilt or fear of judgment, competition, or punishment…all the while keeping in mind that your presence may be just the present your child desires!

    (Emily A. Filmore is the Creative Co-Director of www.cwgforparents.com. She is also the author/illustrator of the “With My Child” Series of books about bonding with your child through everyday activities.  Her books are available at www.withmychildseries.com. To contact Emily, please email her at Emily@cwgforparents.com.)

  • How to reconcile Oneness with eating plants and animals?

    I believe I am one with all life. I do try to preserve life. I do not kill anything I can help killing. I have even taken flies outside (Once there were a bunch trapped inside a window, and easy to catch).  But I have often been perplexed by the fact that I still eat meat. Is eating plant life any different?… Janey

    Dear Janey… To me, that’s the predicament we have with the way we are separated from our food sources in modern-day society. It’s so much easier to eat an animal that has already been slaughtered, prepared, and packaged for our convenience. If I were totally true to myself, I would never eat any meat at all. I haven’t consumed any land animals in over 20 years, but still do eat some seafood. But I can tell you, if I had to catch it myself, I wouldn’t do it. When I see a fisherman catch a fish and put it in his bucket, it’s all I can do to not go over and toss it back into the water!

    As for eating whole plants that we call “vegetables,” that’s not ideal for the spiritually aware person either, as they are also living, breathing individuations of God/Life. I personally feel a little guilty when pulling weeds out of the yard and find myself wanting to give them a “heads up” and apologize!

    If you haven’t read Conversations With God Book 3, you may want to see what it has to say about how Highly Evolved Beings deal with this question.

    CWG says, “Every act is an act of self-definition.” If we want to stop eating plants and animals, we can instead choose to eat only their by-products (seeds, fruits, nuts, grains, eggs and cheese) and probably do our bodies, minds and spirits a world of good!

    If you’re interested in experimenting with a vegetarian diet, I can most highly recommend Vegetarian Cooking For Everyone by Deborah Madison. It’s the cooking “Bible” in our house, and if I could only own one cookbook, this would be it. It takes you by the hand and teaches you everything you ever wanted to know about veggies but were afraid to ask. Bon appetit!

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com.

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • Home for the Holidays…ho, ho, ho??

    Dear Therese,

    I am about to visit my family for the holidays, and I am very nervous about this trip.  We have a difficult history, that’s mostly okay now, but we haven’t seen each other for a long time.  How do I get through this with no drama?  

    KC in NC

    Dear KC,

    This is a difficult and stressful time of year for a lot of people, so don’t think that your situation is unique!

    The first thing I would offer you is resist projecting past data onto the present.  When you do this, you set yourself up to be the one who repeats past behavior, and triggers others to repeat past drama.  The way that works best for me is to remember we are all doing best we can.  The only thing you have control of is you, so be your best, and don’t worry about them.

    Another suggestion would be to declare who you wish to be before you leave on the trip, and each day as you awaken while you are there.  If, for instance, you declare yourself to be peaceful, your doing would come from that space…you would ask yourself, consciously or not, “What would peace do here?”  This works for any state of being.  I often choose understanding.

    If you do these things, the possibility of drama diminishes.  And if it does occur, you are not the cause of the drama.  You can sit calmly in the middle of the chaos, and let others have the path they choose to take, knowing it no longer has to be yours.

    Therese

    (Therese Wilson is a published poet, and is the administrator of the global website at www.ChangingChange.net, which offers spiritual assistance from a team of Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less, and offers insight, suggestions, and companionship during moments of unbidden, unexpected, unwelcome change on the journey of life. She may be contacted at Therese@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com, where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

     

  • Missing the feeling of Unity I once had

    I have had the experience of knowing that I am one with everyone. It was a time in my life that I will never forget and would love to feel that again. I do not know if it feels better to have had this experience for a couple of years or to not have had it at all.  I feel like I am striving to “get there” again, but I understand that what you resists persists. I have to accept where I am at now and let it all flow as it will. I feel like I should be reading, having quiet time (meditation), and focusing on more positive thinking more often. I try to do this as often as I can, but sometimes it feels difficult to do this consistently because of the demands of my 3 little children. I am struggling to feel this sense of “we are all one” on a daily basis… Kim

    Dear Kim… You are incredibly blessed to have had a direct experience of Unity with everyone for two years! You have the consciousness of that now, which will make it easier to manifest again. This is true of anything you’ve had in your life. Once you’ve experienced something, you have the consciousness of it and can more easily create it again. This is why we see millionaires who lose it all only to make it all again!

    I can imagine that three wee ones are very time-consuming, but if you can carve out even fifteen minutes a day to get in touch deeply with your soul, it will help make the rest of your day feel more peaceful. “Stopping meditation” also works for busy moms on the go. Every so often, just stop what you’re doing for ten or fifteen seconds, close your eyes, and touch base with your soul. This is very refreshing! Before you know it, you’ll start to feel that connectedness again.

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com.

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • I am in need of such help right now.

    I am reading WECCE, and I am in need of such help right now. I am full of anxiety, fear, and loneliness for the first time in my life. During the past 2 months, my best friend moved away, my boyfriend, who I loved dearly, broke things off.  Then last week my dog was killed.  I know in my heart and soul that I am supposed to be going through these changes, but I’m having such a hard time letting things go. I built my life for two 1/2 years around my boyfriend.  I have lived alone in several cities with job transfers, etc. And I LOVE where I am living now, and I thought I had met someone with so many interests. I had some of the best times in my life with this person, but he could not give me the spiritual support and move on to build a future with me.  I completely lost and disliked myself.  I KNOW of all this, so why is my heart just clinging to everything?  Why can’t I feel ANY joy in anything I do or see?  I try and try to see the beauty in my home, in nature, in ALL things that brought me such great joy. I just want to let everything go..let go of the pain, let go of the wondering of how I manifested this all. I never imagined I would feel such loneliness – ever.  

    I know my pain will heal and I will feel (and eat) normally again. I will continue to pray and meditate to love myself more. Here it comes…BUT…loving yourself when you are BY yourself is pretty easy (I think), as I have lived alone quite a bit in my life.  The big test comes when you are joined with someone else. I have been emotionally unavailable and feared intimacy ALL my life – hence why I have attracted men that are the same. I want to do everything in my power to change that. How do I know when I’m really ready?  And to really know that my subconscious is going to attract someone that will be good for me?  Do I trust my feeling?  How do I lose the fear? I would appreciate any help….

    C.D.

    Dear C.D.,

    WECCE is about how to embrace Change (another word for God/Evolution), and how to choose how we live in that change.  Part of that process involves looking at our current Truth.  What version of that truth are we living?  Most of us are living in distorted truth.  We can, however, move pretty easily to apparent Truth by simply reframing it with no judgment.  For instance, “My boyfriend broke things off” could merely be “My boyfriend is not with me anymore. ”  “I completely lost and disliked myself” could be “I was not being who I really am in the relationship.”  Even “I can’t feel any joy” could be transformed with “I am experiencing a lack of joy right now,” which would easily allow you to experience the lack of joy with Gratitude, because you know it is only what you are feeling right now, not something that has to go on forever…unless you choose to let it go on forever.

    For every negative thought, there is the opposite positive one.  Look for these opposites, C.D., as you re-train yourself.  It takes practice!  If you are even reaching out, it means that you are beginning to do just that…practice being good to yourself!  Negativity is definitely not good for you or anyone else.

    Take a good look, and you will see your post is all about the past!  This has nothing to do, ultimately, with now…unless you allow it to be.  In reading WECCE, you will have read that this is all past data.  This past data came from many sources, all of which thought that they were protecting you in some way…and all of which were subconscious, and controlled by the ego.  The ego is the part of you that defines you as human, as an individual human, but, nonetheless, is also the part of us that operates out of fear.  This fear is designed to keep us in the familiar and actually stop us from moving into what is truly our better selves.  Fear holds us in place in the now, not in the manner of being present, but from the place of looking back and avoiding looking and moving forward.

    Life, as they say, begins at the edge of your comfort zone…and your comfort zone is fear.  Why do you wish to live your life in fear?  It is serving you in some way?   Since all we do serves us.  Do you get to define yourself as the person who is emotionally unavailable?  or the person who is fearful of intimacy?  In some way, this has served you, but do you wish it to continue to serve you?  Yes, we can choose to love what the past has shown us (in this case you know intimately what fear and unavailable feel like and how you are when you embrace them) and actually choose to be the opposite of that!  This is a world of context, of opposites, and if you know one thing, you are now very well able to know the other…if you choose to remember.

    I would take the “gut” test when you have a thought.  Your tummy will tell you if you are coming from fear or love.  Ask yourself why you even feel you have to have someone in your life right now.  How does the answer feel?  Look in the mirror and look into your eyes and very quietly tell yourself you love you…and keep doing it.

    The first time I read in CWG the part about saying out loud, “I love sex or money or…” and then it asked me to say loudly, “I love me!” I found it amazing that I was unable to say that without hesitation.   Wow!   And I am a pretty self-confident person, so I knew if it was difficult for me, it must be almost impossible for others.  I was okay with all of it, but not the unabashed loving of myself!

    C.D., not only can you tell yourself you love yourself, I would like to tell you something else…you are love!  Just by being here, you have demonstrated that you are love!  By writing this note, you have shown you can overcome fear, which is a supreme act of self love.  How wonderful is that?

    Be gentle with yourself and be proactive…choose!   You are choosing Change right now, actively, because passivity has not served you well.  Way to go!

    Therese

    (Therese Wilson is a published poet, and is the administrator of the global website at www.ChangingChange.net, which offers spiritual assistance from a team of Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less, and offers insight, suggestions, and companionship during moments of unbidden, unexpected, unwelcome change on the journey of life. She may be contacted at Therese@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com, where our team is waiting to hear from you.)