The Global Conversation

Tag: Conversations with God

  • I need help moving out of a fearful place

    I am going through a bit of change looking for a job and being scared of my full potential. I just finished my degree in homeopathy and what I would like to do the most now is to practice and help people. First, however, I need to help myself. I need funds to start my clinic (insurance, association membership, place to practice, the list goes on). Fear of failure keeps me procrastinating and in a fearful place. I want to move out of it and I need help… Ava

    Dear Ava… Thank you for reaching out. I can see why it would be very daunting to open a brand new clinic. That’s quite a laundry list of things to do to get started, and looks to be quite expensive! Let’s see, though, if we can address these other fears you’re having that are holding you back, because an acronym for FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real. And as one of our great American presidents, FDR, said, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”

    You say you are scared of your “full potential”, but is full potential anything to be afraid of? Our Soul’s basic desire is to express itself fully, in the grandest version of the greatest vision it ever held about itself. In other words, to reach its Highest Potential. If you really knew and understood the truth of Who You Are, Ava, an aspect of God with its same unlimited power to create anything you desire, I think fear would not be an issue for you.

    And about that “fear of failure”: did you know that Conversations With God says there is no such thing as failure? Anything that looks like a failure is simply Life’s way of course-correcting. When something we’ve planned doesn’t go the way our Mind thinks it should, it can only be because our Soul has a higher plan for our growth, and this is nothing to be afraid of, my dear! The Mind’s information is so very limited, but the Soul knows all, and will never steer us wrong. We may experience disappointment over a perceived failure when it first happens, but given the benefit of time and hindsight, we will always see the blessing and growth it brought us.

    Would it be possible for you to offer your homeopathy services in a clinic that has already been established, so you wouldn’t have to start one from scratch? Or could you start working part-time out of your home, or perhaps in an herbal or whole foods shop, or at a massage or chiropractic clinic? In other words, see if you can find a way to start your practice on a smaller basis. Since you just graduated, it will give you an opportunity to dip your toe in the water and make sure you really love this line of work before jumping in with both feet! I would think you’d need a little practice too, before starting a clinic.

    Fear is just a distortion of the One Emotion – Love. What do you love so much you’re afraid of losing it? Please look deeply at your fears and ask yourself this all-important question about each one of them: IS IT TRUE?

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

    An additional resource:  The CWG Helping Outreach offers spiritual assistance from a team of non-professional/volunteer Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less. Nothing on the CCN site should be construed or is intended to take the place of or be in any way similar to professional therapeutic or counseling services.  The site functions with the gracious willing assistance of lay persons without credentials or experience in the helping professions.  What these volunteers possess is an awareness of the theology of Conversations with God.  It is from this context that they offer insight, suggestions, and spiritual support during moments of unbidden, unexpected, or unwelcome change on the journey of life.

  • Who’s judging who…and why?

    I have been having some serious family issues lately, and, I admit, the sound must carry to the neighbors.  I have a religious neighbor (we obviously have very different views and parenting styles) who, out of the blue, came up to tell me, in a condescending way, that they pray for us all the time.  She is so judgmental!  Now, if it someone were to say that to you, how would you respond in a shove it up your you-know-what, kindly kind of way??

    Hillery in Montana

     

    Dear Hillery,

    Very simply, I would thank her for her kind thoughts.  And tell her I can use all the kind thoughts I can get!

    I would also not assume that she is without drama/trauma in her own life, so I might also tell her that I would keep her in my prayers as well.

    You referred to how judgmental she is…let her judge.  You are also judging her.  There is a difference between noticing what is, and being judgmental, BTW.  When there is a negative emotion that attaches itself to our perception of the other person, as opposed to the action, we have moved into judgment.  It is natural to react to this emotion.  It is also likely clear to her that you feel this way, and that you don’t think that her way is okay.  So, the cycle of judgment keeps going on and on.

    But you can stop that cycle, Hillery, simply by noticing what you are doing, noticing that she is doing the best she can, and change your mind about her.  How?  Just take what she really means, (that she knows things are not perfect in your world, and you could likely use a little help), and throw out the doctrine and judgment she brings to it.  That simple shift removes your judgment moving back at her.

    There is a very good chance that she felt awkward about saying anything to you, and that she had to muster up the courage to speak to you.  Further, is it also possible that your reaction to her words is your embarrassment in knowing that others know you are struggling, and are witnessing the drama?   Is it possible that you don’t think it is okay what is happening in your life?   We do seem to want the outside world to see only the perfect little family picture, don’t we?

    Sweet Hillary, is it also possible that the judgment you are reacting to is your self judgment?  If so, stop.  Change your mind.  Don’t let fear (embarrassment) and judgment hold you in place.  Let the energy of her, in essence, saying, “You are not alone.”, be what flows through you.  Know that Divinity does not expect perfection from you, because She thinks you are already perfect, no matter that it may appear it is not.

    You may even wish to strike up a conversation with your neighbor, from a new perspective.  Who knows, she may have been reaching out to you from her pain, and you may be able to help each other.  This might actually be the perfect time to teach her a new prayer:

    Thank you Creator/God, for letting me know that this problem has already been solved.  Please help me now to see my part in that solution.

    Therese

    (Therese Wilson is a published poet, and is the administrator of the global website at www.cwghelpingoutreach.com  She may be contacted at:                                                              Therese@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com, where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

    An additional resource:  The CWG Helping Outreach offers spiritual assistance from a team of non-professional/volunteer Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less. Nothing on the CCN site should be construed or is intended to take the place of or be in any way similar to professional therapeutic or counseling services.  The site functions with the gracious willing assistance of lay persons without credentials or experience in the helping professions.  What these volunteers possess is an awareness of the theology of Conversations with God.  It is from this context that they offer insight, suggestions, and spiritual support during moments of unbidden, unexpected, or unwelcome change on the journey of life.

  • Three things you need to know

    As I was driving to work the other day, I heard the local radio personality announce, “And stay tuned for the three things you need to know from the radio station that keeps you up to date with what is important in the world.”

    Oh, my goodness, I was going to arrive at my destination well before they told me the three things I need to know.  Should I stay in my car and risk being late for my appointment while I wait for these vital pieces of information?  What will happen to me if I don’t hear these three crucial nuggets of wisdom?  Because if I need to know them, won’t the absence of knowing them surely have dire circumstances for me?

    Could it be that I need to know that the American government is continuing to play intramural hardball with each other at the expense of the very people who voted them into office, the very people who they claim to have their best interests in mind?

    Could it be that I need to know that former Olympian Bruce Jenner and his wife, Kris Jenner, are now officially separated after 22 years of marriage?

    Could it be that I need to know that there are people who reacted sharply with racist comments and harsh accusations in response to Nina Davuluri becoming the most recent Miss America because of her Indian origin?

    Could it be that I need to know that a young pregnant woman in Mexico City gave birth on the front lawn of a medical clinic after being denied care from the medical personnel inside the facility who told her she was not ready to deliver?

    Or maybe I need to know that the foods I am eating are entirely wrong or what movies I must be watching.  Perhaps I need to know which preschools my children should be going to in order to ensure they will be successful adults or how to Feng Shui the furniture in my living room.  Maybe someone will tell me what car I’m supposed to be driving, what brand of jeans someone “my age” should wear, what length my hair is supposed to be.  And surely I need to know which politician is involved in the latest sex scandal.   And, of course, here is the big one that someone must tell me now:  which version of God I am supposed to be embracing?

    Where does the long list of “things I need to know” end?

    And how is it that everyone else knows what I need to know, and I don’t?

    Of course, I’m being slightly facetious here to make a point.  But how many times and in what kinds of ways are we being told we need something in our lives in order to be, do, or have something else?   In order to be happy?  In order to be abundant?  In order to be in a relationship?  And do we ever stop to consider where we are getting that information?

    Buried deep beneath our belief that somehow we are incomplete, insufficient, less-than, it seems we have forgotten the nature of who we really are.  We have caused ourselves to miss entirely the opportunity to experience ourselves as the source of our own joy and happiness by looking to and accepting external sources of information for our answers and our truth, even when that information is not in alignment with our own wisdom.  Can you imagine a more perfectly vulnerable position for someone to be in if and when somebody else wants their truth to also be yours?

    For me, it has been my experience that the understanding of what I need to know is most often realized in the space of nothingness, in the stillness of nature, and in the absence of words.  And while the outside world provides us an extraordinary opportunity to apply our consciousness through the process of choosing and creating and recreating, I believe there are not 3 things we need to know, nor are there 100 things or one million things.  There is only one thing we need to know; and that is this:  we already know.

    “Life (as you call it) is an opportunity for you to know experientially what you already know conceptually.
    You need learn nothing to do this. You need merely remember what you already know, and act on it.”

    ~ Conversations With God: An Uncommon Dialogue, Vol. 1

    (Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

  • I’m lost and I feel like I’m nothing special

    I’ve seen too much suffering in the world and tried to commit suicide twice when I was young. Today, I’m lost. I’ve tried every church denomination I could find so I’m finally seeking help from a psychiatrist. I take too many meds just to keep me calm and sane. I am trying to find out how to find the peace that I lost along the way. I was never encouraged to do much with my life from my parents. Mediocre was okay. And teachers thought I was just another run of the mill student. Nothing special. So I’m nothing special. And that’s the way I feel. Just another cog, on meds to keep me working… Dan

    Dear Dan… Yours is a very common spiritual problem. You simply don’t understand some things about Life, the understanding of which would change everything. And the things you don’t understand are fundamental questions about how life works the way it does.

    All suffering comes from thought—the thought that things shouldn’t be happening the way they are. We all think this way until we come to larger understandings of the processes of Life. When we realize that our souls call forth the perfect people, places, and events to give us opportunities for growth and expression, we can more easily accept the cruelties of the physical world.

    Do you know who you are, Dan? You are an angel on this Earth, in physical form. Nothing special? I don’t think so, Dan, not for one second. You are an individuated aspect of God, as are we all, and you are capable of embracing the same “Five Attitudes of God”, which according to CWG are these: God is always Joyful, Loving, Accepting, Blessing and Grateful. Since you are part of God, these qualities are are your natural states of being, as well. It is just a matter of choosing thoughts that embody these attitudes no matter what is happening—choosing to consciously marry your mind with your soul’s highest knowing of Who You Really Are and What’s Really Going On Here.

    The way to do this is to be still and go within, often. Yes, I know the mind wants to jump all over the place when we meditate… at first. Learning to be still so we can commune with God/our Soul/our Higher Knowing takes practice, but in my experience, it is the only way to find lasting inner peace and happiness. When we go within we open ourselves to hearing what God is trying to communicate to us so that we can create our life in the happiest, most fulfilling way.

    Do you know that life is meant to be happy, Dan? It is, and it can be, I assure you. Please read Neale’s wonderful book, Happier Than God, for some clear ways to move toward the joy that you naturally are.

    And last, but not least, please begin to take your mind’s emphasis off yourself, and look to see how you can be a blessing to everyone you come into contact with. The world needs the very special uniqueness that is you, Dan. You will find that as you do what you can to uplift others, you also uplift yourself in the process.

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

    An additional resource:  The CWG Helping Outreach offers spiritual assistance from a team of non-professional/volunteer Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less. Nothing on the CCN site should be construed or is intended to take the place of or be in any way similar to professional therapeutic or counseling services.  The site functions with the gracious willing assistance of lay persons without credentials or experience in the helping professions.  What these volunteers possess is an awareness of the theology of Conversations with God.  It is from this context that they offer insight, suggestions, and spiritual support during moments of unbidden, unexpected, or unwelcome change on the journey of life.

  • Let’s get to the root of the problem, shall we?

    According to UNICEF, only 58% of secondary-aged children world-wide regularly attend school. In highly industrialized areas, like North America and Europe, that percentage rises to 92%. But in areas like Africa, those numbers fall to less than 30%. Two thirds of the world’s illiterate are woman. In some countries, it is even illegal for young girls to receive an education.

    The lack of education has a cascading effect on the level of poverty. Consider these facts:

    – Women in impoverished nations who have a secondary education have an average of 3 children. Those with less education have an average of 7.

    – In developing countries, an additional year of education has the potential to increase yearly earnings by 10%.

    – Women with a primary education level are 13% more likely to understand that condom use can help prevent the spread of HIV.

    The level of poverty has a domino effect on the health and well being of the world’s population.

    – More than 6 million children a year die from completely preventable causes like diarrhea and malaria. Most of these children are in impoverished nations with limited access to health care and clean drinking water.

    – Another 6 million children under the age of five die every year from malnutrition.

    – Almost 39% of the world’s population survives on less than $2 a day. More than 1 billion of those survive on less than $1 a day. To put that in perspective, someone in the US who is paying $589/month for a car loan for their gas-guzzling Hummer is paying every month almost twice what some people earn in an entire year.

    In this day and age, numbers like this are almost unfathomable. Perhaps a better word would be unconscionable. Yet this is the very real situation for more than a third of the world’s population. And the gap between the “haves” and the “have-nots” is getting larger, even in industrialized and prosperous nations like the US. A 2013 report by the ALF-CIO places the average salary of a CEO in a US company at 364 times that of the average worker.  Even in Poland, a CEO makes 28 times what the average worker earns in one year.

    How we got to this point would—and does—fill volumes. Countless theses have been written on the causes of poverty and an untold number of studies have been done on how to eradicate it. Unfortunately, none of those efforts will succeed no matter how many times we try, no matter what variations we enact into policy, no matter how strict we make our laws, no matter how many social organizations we form to combat poverty because none of them address the root cause of the problem: the steadfast belief in the absolute truth of the Five Fallacies about Life.

    1. Humans are separate from each other.

    2. There is not enough of what human beings need to be happy.

    3. To get enough of the stuff there is not enough of, human beings must compete with each other.

    4. Some human beings are better than other human beings.

    5. It is appropriate for human beings to resolve severe differences created by all the other fallacies by killing each other.

    Fortunately, the masters down through the ages have given us a very simple way to overcome our beliefs, since we seem so unwilling to change them. It is most commonly called “The Golden Rule” and it was first found in the Vedic tradition of India almost 5000 years ago. Virtually every faith and religion, every philosophical and spiritual practice that man has created has some version of this truly insightful statement. Simply put, “Treat others the way you want to be treated.”

    The reason that following this simple rule would change life as we know it overnight is due to the fact that, at the very root of the matter, every one of us wants to be treated exactly the same way! Every one of us wants to live our life as we see fit, according to the beliefs that we hold dear, without undue interference from others.

    If every one of us followed the Golden Rule, there would be no need for laws, no need for governments, no need for armies, no need for nations. There would be no poverty, no killing, no abuse, no wars, no rape, no discrimination, no wanton destruction of the environment.

    I would not kill you because I would not want to be killed.

    I would not pollute your water supply because I would not want my water supply polluted.

    I would not let you go hungry because I would not want to go hungry.

    I would not interfere with your choice of who to marry because I would not want someone to interfere with my choice.

    I would make sure you had access to all the knowledge you needed to live your life as you saw fit because I want access to all the knowledge I need to live my life as I see fit.

    “But that will never happen!” I can hear the naysayers cry already. “You’ll never get everyone to follow the Golden Rule!”

    You don’t have to.

    The Golden Rule is a unilateral, unconditional command. It does not say “Treat others the way you want to be treated only if they treat you that way first” or “only if they treat you that way in return” or “only if they’re the same color/religion/orientation/socioeconomic level/etc. as you”. It says simply “Treat other people the way you want to be treated.” Period.  End of discussion.

    You are to follow the Golden Rule in spite of how other people treat you. You are not to sit around and wait for someone else to follow the Golden Rule before you begin to follow it.

    When you do this, small miracles happen. People start to like the way you are treating them and they begin to take notice and they begin to imitate how you treat others and they begin to treat others the way you treated them. With Love. Unconditional Love.

    When unconditional Love is given out, it multiplies. It is contagious. It spreads. Because it is healing to be Loved unconditionally. Just as when one cell of your body begins to heal, the cells around it begin to heal, so too will the human race heal when Loved unconditionally.

    Are you willing to be the first cell in your world to heal?

    Shelly(Shelly Strauss is a civil rights activist and speaker.  In addition to becoming an ordained minister, she has written 20+ novels and is the “resident visionary” at One Spirit Project.  Shelly is also a spiritual helper on the ChangingChange website, offering support and guidance to people faced with unexpected and unwelcome change .)

  • Perfectly imperfect

    If there was one word in our language that I wish we could eliminate, or at least redefine, it would be the word “perfect.”  Actually, not the word itself, but rather the idea that we are somehow inherently less than or in need of being improved upon,  and that the only way to experience a life of happiness, joy, and freedom is to be, do, or have something different than we are already being, doing, or having.

    The irony is that in our quest for perfection, as we have largely come to understand it, we are blocking our own ability to see ourselves as who and what we truly are, which is – ironically — perfect.  The expectation bar has been set mighty high by many of us.  And buried deep beneath its many complicated layers of judgment and insufficiency lies the opportunity for each and every one of us to experience our natural state of wholeness and completeness.

    For many, life has become a distorted sort of treasure hunt, a mission, a goal-oriented conditional experience:

    If only I had more money, then I would be able to buy the big house on the hill and have designer clothes and even that bright red sports car…because that would bring me happiness.

    If only I had thinner thighs or larger breasts, then I would attract a partner who would desire me and finally have the relationship of my dreams…because that would bring me love.

    If only my house was always clean and organized, then I could finally relax and read those books which are collecting dust on my bookshelf or have the time to take that yoga class…because that would bring me peace.

    If only I had a better job, then I would make more money so I would be able to buy the big house on the hill and have the designer clothes and even that bright red sports car…

    If I had all these things, finally my life would be perfect.

    And the cycle is perpetuated – want, strive, push, want, strive, push, want, strive, push – which still does not produce the outcome we think we are supposed to have, which causes us to push harder and strive more, leaving us utterly exhausted and mentally drained and completely detached from any notion or concept about who we really are.

    Does a state of “perfection” exist?

    What would it actually look like if it did?

    Why do we yearn to be more?  To be better?   And why are we willing to trade in our happiness in exchange for a concept that demonstrates itself over and over and over again to be unrealized?

    Is “perfection” something that we are capable of experiencing beyond perhaps the exact moment we are born into this world?   There are some who would say even a newborn baby is not perfect, that they, too, come into this world flawed, in need of fixing or improving upon, to the degree that they are actually in need of forgiveness.  Is that conceivable or even possible?

    I sense that there is some level of perfection woven into the universal tapestry within which we find ourselves a part of, some purposeful fluidity that encompasses each and every one of us, even though the collective cognitive grasp of what that might be seems to lies just beyond the boundaries of our understanding.  But I also believe that we are provided momentary glimpses into this realm of deeper understanding, demonstrated by numerous occurrences in my own life where an experience of overwhelming sensation of goodness and joy fills me and reminds me that there is a harmonious energy at play here in the seemingly random happenings in my life.

    So today I will celebrate my imperfections, I will laugh at the choices that feel like mistakes, and I will be grateful for all the “wrong” turns I make and awkward or embarrassing things I might say.  I will stop wishing I was that and feel appreciative because I am this.  I will open my heart to extend the same appreciation and kindness to all those who share this life journey with me, knowing that these are the moments that I believe are best described as, well, perfect.

    “If a snowflake is utterly perfect in its design, do you not think the same could be said about something as magnificent as your life?”
    ~ “Conversations with God” 

    (Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

  • Your life is not about you

    If you are already familiar with the “Conversations with God” material, more than likely you have one or two insights or messages contained within the Cosmology that are especially meaningful to you, something that, when you first heard it, resonated with such clarity and fullness that it caused a noticeable and significant shift in your life.

    For me, one of the most profound concepts to flow out of the “Conversations with God” messages is the following:

    Your life is not about you.  Rather, your life is about those whose lives you touch.

    I remember the exact moment these words came into my life.  I recall the precise instant when everything I thought to be true until that point was turned upside down.  I was attending a “When Everything Changes, Change Everything” retreat in 2007, sitting in a dimly lit room along with 75 other people from around the world, when I first heard these exact words:  Your life is not about you.

    Well, if my life was not about me, then what IS it about?

    If my life was, rather, about those whose lives I touch, then what does that mean for me?  There has got to be something in it for me in the whole and sometimes messy scheme of things, right?  After all, aren’t I the one doing the heavy lifting in my life here?  Again, still having a hard time completely accepting the “not about me” aspect in all of this.

    But while my mind was twisting itself into pretzels, trying to make sense of this completely new ideology that was just introduced to me, the next words flowed into my life:

    You see, there is only one of us in the room.  So what you do for another, you do for yourself.  What you do for yourself, you do for another.   And that is because we are all One.

    And there it was, placed gently before me, the message which redefined the purpose of my life, the spiritual wisdom which altered the way I interact and enter into relationships with others.   I had always proclaimed to embrace the concept of “we are all one,” at least on an intellectual or cognitive level.  But my skewed vantage point thus far hadn’t allowed me to know this experientially nearly as often or completely as I would have liked.

    Life feels harder and more external to us when we are simply each out to get our own, when we place expectations upon what we think we deserve.  On the other hand, haven’t we all experienced the perfection of a truly selfless gesture towards another?   The pure joy and quiet bliss of being of service to someone in need, without expectation of anything in return? Aren’t these instances of “not about me-ness” the ones that propel us into our own greatness, demonstrating to us all that there is no faster way to have something in your life than just simply going out and choosing to be it?

    Oh, boy, do I still have days where I think life is all about me.  I have plenty of them.  I have moments when I question everything I believe to be true.  There are times when I cross paths with people who I am convinced are not only separate from me but I am quite certain they are working in direct contradiction to me, motivated by an entirely different energy source than the one I am fueled by, even though at the highest level of awareness I know that is simply not true.

    But these are the gifts that life is consistently presenting to me, the golden nuggets of opportunity that surround me, even though I may not be able to readily see them and might even find myself resisting them.  These are the moments when I get to decide who I really am.  These are the times when I get to ask and answer some important questions: Why am I here, right here, right now, at this exact moment in time?  Who is it I am here with and for?  Who might life be calling upon me to be?

    These are the instances when I remember…my life is not about me.

    (Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

  • Can I make myself love someone?

    What happens if you simply do not feel love for a certain person (even if it’s a spouse or mother). The feeling of “love” is just not there. Do you act as if you do or convince yourself that you do love them even though you don’t feel it until you do feel it? You can care for a person and don’t want any harm to them, but just don’t “love” them. Perhaps I have the wrong perception of what love is or can be. I love my two children to death (figure of speech); therefore, I know what feeling love is. What are your thoughts as I’m struggling with this.  Blessings, Lyne 

    Dear Lyne…My mother has always said we love in many different ways. I don’t love my sister the same way that I love my father. I don’t love a former sweetheart the same way I love my husband. I don’t even love my favorite cat Pippin the same way I love our kitten, Beanie! This is because each and every one of us is unique.

    I also think it’s entirely possible to love someone at an intellectual level, but not like them, or at least, not like their actions or their way of being in the world. Remember, we are vibratory beings and just as in music, vibrations either resonate and or they’re dissonant. When two vibrations resonate, they flow harmoniously together, but when two vibrations are dissonant, it feels quite uncomfortable. It might help you to understand, though, that just because certain wave forms may not resonate with each other, it doesn’t make either one of them “bad”. Sometimes our vibes just don’t jibe!

    I’m sorry if this isn’t the answer you want to hear about your spouse, but I learned the hard way (after a long seven-year relationship) that I couldn’t force myself to feel romantic love. I loved the guy “to death”, to use your words, thinking that I would eventually fall in love with him, but it never happened. Our bond was loyal and deep and full of love, just not that kind of love. The chemistry was just not there and I couldn’t will it to happen, no matter how much I wanted to. Perhaps other people are different, but I know I’ll never go down that road again. Thankfully, we parted in the kindest, most loving way possible, and after enough healing time, we ended up remaining the dear friends we were all along… thank God!

    Now, in the case of your mother, who you are expected to spend some amount of time with throughout your life, it may indeed, behoove you to act as if you love her if you want to spare her feelings, but always “to thine own self be true.” You either feel love for her or you don’t, and it doesn’t make you a bad daughter if you don’t. Give yourself the breathing room you need in the relationship and forgive yourself for your feelings if you haven’t done so already. If you think you can be with her from time to time in a positive way, you might feel good about doing that, especially for her sake, but I would make the phone calls or visits brief enough that you stay happy throughout the encounters. It wouldn’t serve either of you if the visits are so long they begin to deteriorate.

    I hope this helps, Lyne. If you need more personal assistance with this, please feel free to call on one of us CWG Life Coaches. The first session is always free. You can find out more about this opportunity here:

    http://nealedonaldwalsch.com/index.php?p=Doc&c=lifecoaching

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

     

    An additional resource:  The CWG Helping Outreach offers spiritual assistance from a team of non-professional/volunteer Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less. Nothing on the CCN site should be construed or is intended to take the place of or be in any way similar to professional therapeutic or counseling services.  The site functions with the gracious willing assistance of lay persons without credentials or experience in the helping professions.  What these volunteers possess is an awareness of the theology of Conversations with God.  It is from this context that they offer insight, suggestions, and spiritual support during moments of unbidden, unexpected, or unwelcome change on the journey of life.

  • We are all one vs. violence

    My animal survival instinct and my human ego tell me that my life (and the safety of my family) is more important than yours – but my soul tells me that it is not.

    There, I’ve said it. Is that raw enough? Doesn’t that really sum up the reason that we consider going to war? That we kill each other in the streets? That we continue to fight over food, economic policies…over anything?

    If you have read my previous articles, you know I usually approach parenting as it pertains to my young daughter. Well, during the recent crisis in Syria, I have had many discussions with my spiritual, peace-loving, twenty-year-old nephew. One struck me as odd and we played it out until the wee hours of the morning. He, like me and so many spiritual people, has been praying intently for a peaceful, non-violent resolution to the Syrian situation. He has visceral reactions at the thought of us intervening in another country with even targeted attacks; and he is adamant in his agreement that violence would beget more violence.

    On this night, we discussed our shared feelings that no “collateral damage” is acceptable, as well as our wish that there was a way to break the cycle of war to end tyranny. We talked about how past acts, like what is going on in Syria, that have gone unchecked by the international community have come back to haunt the world when they became mass genocide later. But we both, again, stated wishes that we lived in a world where there were other viable answers than more violence. We acknowledged that there are no easy answers and stated that we didn’t envy any of the leaders and their decisions at this time; especially given the thought about retaliation if our government did decide to act with strikes.

    And that’s when he surprised me.

    As the conversation turned toward the long-term effects of waging violence against others and what happens when we continue to anger the rest of the world with our interventions and potentially have aggression toward our own soil, his demeanor and attitude changed. He is all about peace until he feels his own safety and security threatened. He almost became hawkish as he talked about protecting our soil at all costs. I gently began asking him questions, trying (mindfully) not to make his opinions wrong, about where he draws a line of difference.  He stated that this is “our land” and “our people” and so we must protect them.

    I asked him what border makes it “ours.”  Is it our lawn? Our street? Our state? Our country? Our continent or hemisphere? I even posited that, within my understanding of “We Are All One” from Conversations with God, to me, “our” includes every human on earth as an equal and undivided part of me. With this in mind, we either love and protect, to the extent possible, every person on earth equally or we give up that façade and we try a different approach.

    See, like most of you, I don’t know the answers to these burning questions. I don’t know how to end violence in the world. I hope and believe that the spiritual and prayerful push of the last week and a half had an effect on John Kerry’s off-hand remark, the Russian encouragement, and the Syrian apparent acquiescence to a possible chemical disarmament (try to say that 10 times fast).

    But I cannot walk around feeling that American lives are superior and deserve to be protected above other lives. I cannot, as much as I love my daughter, my nephew, and my husband, carry a gun to protect them at the cost of killing another person. I just cannot value one life over another. I haven’t fully decided where self-defense fits in with spirituality (although I have been confronted with situations in which I knew I would not kill to protect myself), but we have to start somewhere to shift the paradigm away from violence. Someone has to be willing to “put the weapons down” and talk…

    …And intelligence and diplomacy have to stop looking like weakness.

    In the end, I may not have changed my nephew’s mind about protecting “us” at all costs. But I am hoping that on some level I have helped him to begin exploring a new level of the concept, understanding, and application of “We Are All One.”

    What conversations have you had with your young ones about the conflict between violence and love?

    (Emily A. Filmore is the Creative Co-Director of www.cwgforparents.com. She is also the author/illustrator of the “With My Child” Series of books about bonding with your child through everyday activities.  Her books are available at www.withmychildseries.com. To contact Emily, please email her at Emily@cwgforparents.com.)

  • Remembering 9/11

    I find myself engulfed in footage of the day that shook our country to its core; 9/11/01.  Every year at this time, I watch the videos, listen to the phone calls, and remember where I was on that grim day.  For many of us, we can close our eyes and bring ourselves right back to that horrific morning.

    Usually, feelings of sadness and empathy would rise to the surface and display themselves in tears rolling down my cheeks.  The images always seemed dark, full of death and despair, and mainly… evil.  This year, as I watch that day play out again on my television, I see and feel something totally different.  What is it?

    Truth is… I watch and I see God (Why hadn’t I seen Him in there before?)  I watch and I feel love.

    Here’s the thing,  we were all affected on ‘that’ day, but how we reacted was simply amazing.  Society came together  in the name of love.  We became a city, a country, filled with strangers rushing to help strangers.  A massive web of support.  The word ‘Family’ took on a whole new meaning.  As we hugged our own spouses/children/parents as tight as possible, we also opened our arms to our neighbors.  Kisses, tears, appreciation and gratitude poured out of our hearts, sometimes uncontrollably.

    We ran to find ways to help our neighbors.  We jumped in line to donate blood.  We adorned our homes, our cars, our offices with ribbons.  Everywhere you looked, you saw the American Flag waving high and strong.

    Our lives stopped.

    We became quiet.

    Strangers became friends.

    Cities became communities.

    God appeared in our actions.

    9/11, although tragic, ignited a fire of love in each and every one of our souls.  A love, unfortunately, too soon forgotten.  So, as I sit remembering, I choose not to cry but rather bow my head in prayer.  I ask you to join me.

    I pray that one day our country, our world, will come together in the name of love.  I pray that we will once again be able to look at strangers as the precious lives they are.  I pray that, without hesitation, we will rush to aid our neighbors in their time of need and that they will rush to us in ours.

    I pray it won’t take another crisis to make it happen.

    I pray for love.

    And most importantly…

    I pray for you.

    Jaimie Schultz(Jaimie Schultz , a/k/a Pajamas, is a fun-loving, passionate, adventure seeker who loves life and loves helping others see how much they should love theirs. She is passionate about all things mystical and out of her control. You can visit her website at www.pajamasnotebook.com)

    (If you would like to contribute an article you have authored to the Guest Column, please submit it to our Managing Editor, Lisa McCormack, for possible publication in this space. Not all submissions can be published, due to the number of submissions and sometimes because of other content considerations, but all are encouraged. Send submissions to Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com. Please label the topic: “Guest Column.”)