The Global Conversation

Blog

  • A soul named Bob

    It was recently brought to my attention that my driver’s license had expired and that I had been driving around town “illegally” for over two weeks.  This troubled me, of course, because I immediately thought for sure Murphy’s Law would pay me a visit and I would, for the first time in years and years, now ironically get stopped by the police for a moving violation or a broken taillight or, worse yet, maybe find myself involved in an automobile accident, my expired license only adding to my misfortune.  Yes, I was frantically writing my own best-selling “what if” story.

    But my mind was also busy imagining a situation that perhaps, at least more immediately, was even worse than that — the dreaded thought of having to make an early Monday morning visit to the Department of Motor Vehicles to renew my lapsed license.  Oh, just the thought of waiting in those long lines, only to be served by overly tired, underpaid, and under-appreciated government employees who spend long dreary days in a gray office with no windows, determined to suck all of us into their miserable lair.  Thought by thought, I was erecting giant walls of resistance around me.

    So I came up with a plan.  I would be the very first one in line!  That way I will avoid those long painful lines and maybe find myself fortunate enough to be served by someone at the DMV who hadn’t yet been worn down and numbed by a full day of monotony.  Yes!  That is what decided to do.  So I smugly arrived at the DMV at 7:45 a.m., knowing they opened at 8:30 a.m., and feeling confident that I would be the first to arrive.

    Except I wasn’t.  I was not the first person in line.  I was the second person in line.

    And this is when I met Bob.

    Bob is an 82-year-old gentleman who, like me, came to the DMV office to renew his driver’s license.  But it did not take long for me to experience the “real” reason Bob was there.

    Bob was there for me.

    This soft-spoken, kind man, with a smile that extended into his eyes, thought that the driver’s license office opened at 8:00, only to discover that he now had 45 minutes to wait outside on the unforgiving hard sidewalk, with nowhere to sit, nowhere to rest his frail legs.   But what he did have is someone to talk to, to share his life with, to laugh with, to be present with, someone who understood the much, much larger reason for his “mistake” in thinking the DMV opened at 8:00 and someone who also now understood the underlying purpose in my premeditated “plan” to beat the crowd.

    I was there for Bob.

    In those precious 45 minutes, I learned from Bob that he said goodbye to his life-long companion just six short months ago.  And he misses her dearly.  I could feel his sadness and deep love for her.  I knew that Bob was experiencing her presence just by having someone to share her memory with, that her essence was alive and very real in our interaction with each other, and I was honored and profoundly touched to be chosen as a surrogate with whom Bob could once again experience her love and grace.

    I learned from Bob that he wobbles when he walks sometimes.  But he says he does not think of or label this as “stumbling” or “wobbling.”  Bob says he is dancing.   And in our short time together, Bob danced a lot.  I wonder if in some of these seemingly unsteady moments his soul is engaging in a breathtaking waltz with his beautiful wife?

    I learned from Bob that even though he is no longer able to travel around the country in his motor home as he once did with his Beloved Other, there is a wonderful channel on his Dish network that shows beautiful scenery from around the world — majestic mountains, tranquil beaches, and colorful fields of flowers.  And if you get up really early in the morning, at 4:00 a.m., as he does, you can watch that program and “feel like you are right there. ” And “if you are a believer,” as Bob offered to me, “they even scroll some scripture across the bottom,” to which he gently and thoughtfully added, “if you want that.”

    I learned from Bob that even though his life partner has continued on in her soul’s journey, he still greets each new dawn with purpose and appreciation.  While he oftentimes yearns for the physical presence of his wife, he understands that he still has soul work to do and a life to live and experience – and he has decided to show up in his own life with humor, kindness, and intention.

    There was a point in my life, not too very long ago, when I would have missed entirely the enormous gift being presented within this relationship and within this experience.  There may have even been a time where I would have avoided this wonderful elderly gentleman altogether by inconspicuously burying my face in my phone or casually dismissing him with a polite smile.   Boy, am I thankful I am not living in that space anymore.

    My encounter with Bob is a reminder that what I think is going on isn’t always what is going on.  My well-laid plan to beat the crowd at the DMV and to make sure that I avoided an uncomfortable personal experience had nothing to do with what I originally imagined.  Bob and I had a soul agreement long before our bodies arrived at that particular location at that particular time and in that particular way.

    How would our lives change if we viewed every person with whom we interacted as an intentional and purposeful gift?  Have our souls chosen the people who are in our lives and those that are held within our next choice?  Or are we just randomly bumping into each other?  It is easy to view our own biological families and chosen partners and our children and friends as gifts.  But what about the passers-by?  What about the person next to you in line at the grocery store?  What about the “overly tired, underpaid, and under-appreciated government employees who spend long dreary days in a gray office with no windows”?

    We sometimes realize after-the-fact that something big, something of importance, something Divine has just taken place.  But when we come to this same realization “in the moment” we are actually experiencing it, we can see the opportunity we are being given to remember a little bit more about who we are and why we are here, and we become powerful creators and flow-throughs of God’s love.

    At 8:30 on the nose, the doors to the DMV opened and I followed Bob into the building.  We parted ways to go to our respective service windows, immense feelings of gratitude welling up inside me.  When I arrived to meet the person who would be assisting me that morning, the person to whom I had projected unfavorable predictions upon, the individual whose mere existence I was a short while ago resisting, I was warmly greeted with a radiant smile and a cheery, “Good morning!  How may I help you today?” – and I immediately knew another opportunity was presenting itself to me.

    (Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation.  She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com) 

  • Changing our thought processes about events

    I’d like some help clarifying a “revelation” that I recently experienced. Up until a few days ago I would have said I didn’t have much of a possibility to repair ancient wounds in my life, or to repair a friendship that’s dear to me. But something turned me around: the realization that the past cannot be changed and that by dwelling on it one way or the other I was cheating myself of the presents that lay the Here and Now. I also realized I could be patient in the long process of rekindling this friendship, all the while staying confident, peaceful. And this is new to me, because I had a tendency to let my emotions define me. What do you think about this? Thanks in advance for your insight. … Lisa

    Dear Lisa… So what happened to turn you around was that you simply changed your thought processes about what had happened, right? Just goes to show that we create our reality at an inner level. To change our reality about anything, all we need to do is change our thinking about it—to look at what happened from a different perspective.

    Have you read Neale’s book, When Everything Changes, Change Everything? The Line of Causality/Mechanics of the Mind lays out the lightning-fast thought process we have in our Minds regarding any event, and shows how we move from the event itself to our reality about it. Each of these steps leads to the other:

    Event – Data – Truth – Thought – Emotion – Experience – Reality

    I’ll try to explain briefly here:

    1. An Event happens.

    2. We immediately search our brains’ Data for past experience of something similar to that Event, so that we may contextualize it somehow.

    3. We have a prior Truth about that Data, which we often project onto the new Event (justifiably or not).

    4. That Truth causes a Thought to arise about the Event. This may be a true Thought or not.

    5. That Thought causes an Emotion inside us.

    6. The Emotion, as you so aptly said, “defines” us and creates our Experience.

    7. Our Experience becomes our Reality.

    This happens so fast we don’t even know it!

    In your case, I think you realized a few days ago that your prior Thought that there wasn’t much of a possibility to repair the wounds or friendship, isn’t true. So now, your process beyond Step 4 is different. Your new Thought that there is a possibility for a happier ending brings forth a new, better-feeling Emotion, which leads to a new Experience of life for you, resulting in a new Reality. Woohoo! Good for you!

    Does this make sense? It’s, of course, explained in great detail and depth in Neale’s book, including how we may incorporate the System of the Soul here, but the main point is this:

    “Change our Thought, Change our Reality.” Or as the common New Thought expression goes:

    “Change your thinking, change your life!”

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • Dreams of the Mighty

    Within the first few pages of this delightful book, I knew I was in for a real treat!  “Dreams of the Mighty,” by Kim Wood and Teri Roefs, is a colorful and magical journey of self-realization for Les, a man who plods through his day-to-day challenges, feeling discouraged with the way life is playing out for him, feeling as though something was missing, while at the same time sensing that something significant, something life-changing, was about to happen to him.

    And, boy, was it!

    In this wonderful celebration of life, an adventure of twists and turns, brimming with unexpected surprises and unlikely relationships, “Les finally knew beyond all doubt that he was truly free, always had been, forever would be. He rejoiced in the indescribably rich, purposeful engagement that his life had been; a hallowed script, a miraculous role, a blessed cast—every act flawless and complete within the divine plan.”

    Kim and Teri have injected a clever balance of humor and spirituality into this uplifting novel, an extraordinary and refreshing combination that is not commonly found in a lot of today’s new-thought writings, a shining example that, yes, even a quest for one’s true self can be lighthearted and fun.  One of its underlying messages is that if we place ourselves in a space of openness and awareness to everything around us, we can’t help but to feel our connection to all of it and experience the significance of our presence within it.

    Treat yourself, as I did, to this engaging and thoughtful book written by two passionate and creative authors who have used their own inner personal spiritual journey to inspire and touch all those who share their path.

    “Dreams of the Mighty” can be found and purchased online at www.chapters.indigo.ca, or, for substantially less, as an E-book
    from www.smashwords.com.

    (Kim Wood is an author whose creativity, lifelong passion for the written word, keen sense of humor and insatiable curiosity about the ‘whys’ of being have come together here in Dreams of the Mighty, his first novel.  Kim can be reached at krwood@rogers.com.  Teri Roefs is a psychotherapist practicing in and around Ottawa, Canada. She is a certified hypnotherapist, a clinical member of the Gestalt Psychotherapy Institute, an EMDR and Energy Psychology practitioner, and has completed training in a wide range of therapeutic procedures.  Teri can be reached at athene1@rogers.com.) 

    (Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team atwww.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

    (If there is a book, movie, music CD, etc. that you would like to recommend to our worldwide audience, please submit it to our Managing Editor, Lisa McCormack, for possible publication in this space. Not all submissions can be published, due to the number of submissions and sometimes because of other content considerations, but all are encouraged. Send submissions to Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com. Please label the topic: “Review”)

  • I Hear Voices

    That’s right, I hear voices — four of them actually.  And tonight I recognized them and saw very clearly what was happening, and it started with a prayer.  I prayed while laying in savasana after an inspiring yoga class.  My prayer was a simple one, a typical one even.  I knew I had to get this blog up.  And I am somewhat of an inspirational writer.  What I mean by that is when something in my life inspires me, the thoughts come fast and furious.  When this happens, I need to get to the computer quickly or at the very least a pad and pen.

    This past week, I haven’t had the opportunity to let those things that I felt inspired to write about get written down or entered into the computer.  My busy life was stringing out my current blog past when it was time to change it and I needed some inspiration.  So I prayed.  I asked God in what I recognized was my voice, “God, please bring through me the words that those reading my blog this week are seeking to hear.”  I continued in my head with the invocation, although this one had a different voice, albeit it was still my voice. The inflection was not as strong and committed, and it stuttered a little.

    The prayer continued in this shaky voice, “Please, God, let this blog be of great service.”

    This is where it became interesting.  Another voice almost simultaneously, yet seemingly behind the shaky voice, a higher pitched, tense, and uneasy voice, was saying, “Let this be of great service to me as well.”

    Just as that voice started to say that, another voice came in and chimed, “You can’t ask for this to serve you!”  This voice was clearly different, as were all four of the voices, yet they were, strangely enough, all my voice.  It was very clear to me while this was happening ,that these were all my thoughts with my different data attached to them surrounding what each statement was.

    This noticing of my thoughts, and the voices attached to them, was fairly unique to me.  I have listened to the voices in my head many times and always wondered what was going on there.  I have been intrigued about how many different levels there are in my mind.  And that kicked off another whole set of thoughts and voices.

    The thought process fascinated me, especially with the level of clarity and awareness in which it occurred.  I quickly had the thought, “This is the blog!”  As soon as I made that decision, I had two simultaneous things going on in my head.

    The first was, “Don’t forget this!”  I began to repeat the topic over and over in my head so I would remember: “I hear voices, I hear voices…”  While repeating that mantra, my secondary thoughts were flying about, “How does this tie in to addiction?”  One voice said, “You can’t write about something like that.   What if it harms someone?”  While immediately another voice said, “Oh, my God, people who hear voices need to read this.  They need to know that maybe those voices are there to bring awareness to our thoughts.”  This very same voice said, “You must write this article.”

    And so that conversation took place in my head in a two-minute span while laying on a floor in a 105 degree room, soaking wet after a ninety-minute yoga class where every aspect of my being was pushed to the limits.  This incredible insight happened because I took time for myself.  I made time for me and only me to honor what God has given me, a beautiful mind capable of multi-layered thought, an incredible body that is able to do more than I ever give it credit for, and a soul in which to rely upon and seek wisdom, compassion, discipline, and insight from.

    You see, recovery is about always seeking greater insight into ourselves, the world around us, and to expand our consciousness of what we believe our Creator to be.  If I seek to remain open, and never declare anything to be the ultimate truth, that leaves me with the power to recreate myself and my world at any moment.  When you are in a state of mind that is seeking higher states of Divinity, there is no room for relapse.

    I understand that for some hearing voices is a sign of mental illness, and that should not be taken lightly, nor should it be made fun of.  What I am encouraging people to do here is take a concept and think deeply on it.  What I did only took two minutes and the feeling and inspiration was phenomenal.

    (Kevin McCormack is a Conversations with God Life Coach, a Spiritual helper on www.changingchange.net, and an Addictions recovery advisor.  You can visit his website for more information at www.Kevin-Spiritualmentor.com  To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@theglobalconversation.com)

  • Saying goodbye and beginning again…

    I said goodbye to my dear friend and colleague Patty Hammett last week. She was the Administrator of the Conversations with God Foundation with whom I have had the pleasure of working with for over thirteen years. She and I shared our common passion and common mission with the CwG Foundation of giving people back to themselves, which in CwG terms means helping others to recreate themselves anew in their next grandest version of the greatest vision ever they held about who they are. Last week’s column on being angry at disease was based in my grief around losing her, another dear friend gone to cancer, but it also inspired me to recommit to helping people find holistic solutions to everyday living problems.

    Patty left her physical form, yet I feel as if she is here with me right now. In fact, I will tell you that I feel her inspiration and words flowing through me as we speak. I imagine it is a similar feeling that Neale Donald Walsch must get when he is having his conversations with God. I hear Patty’s voice nudging me, inviting me, guiding me, and all I have to do is let it flow. This is a wonderful feeling and important for me since I have been asked to fill her shoes at the CwG Foundation as the new Administrator and Program Director. I loved working with Patty, and it seems our work will continue; I feel a profound sense of gratitude for this. My sense of sadness is coupled with this overwhelming feeling of her presence right here, right now, which causes me to feel something other than sad. I am not sure there is a word for it, but I am at peace. So this week’s column is written by Patty Hammett, here to inspire JR and YOU to be the next grandest version of the greatest vision ever we held about who we are.

    When I was asked by Neale Donald Walsch and Will Richardson, the CwG Foundation board President, to take over the leadership of the foundation, I will tell you that I felt it potentially to be too daunting a task for me. We talked for several hours about it, and still I wasn’t sure if I could do the foundation justice. It is interesting how fear and doubt will show right up when we are offered opportunities that we know in the moment will change our life forever for the better, yet still they show up as if they are there to protect us from all that good about to be bestowed upon us…”can’t have that” says fear! I left with my head swimming, wondering if I had made the right decision, second guessing my choice, feeling uncertain if I could pull it off. Would I make Patty proud?  Oh, God, how am I going to fill those shoes? It seems my prayers were answered the very next morning when I awoke full of excitement and passion; the ideas began to flow out of me. They were pouring out of me faster than I could write them down or express them to others, and that is when I realized Patty’s presence had replaced the fear. It was the moment I knew that she was still here, that I was not alone in this, and that I could do it. She was literally flowing through me.  She was using my hands just as she is doing right now to express these very words to you. She was in spirit, that is, inspiring me.  And then I had no doubt.  I knew I was not alone and that we could do it. Call it what you will, but when you have this kind of an experience, being in spirit, something inside of you shifts. That is the God Experience.

    And God knows I needed a shift. If you read my columns, you know that I have been moving through the loss of a marriage which ended in betrayal, the loss of someone I care for deeply, the loss of hopes, dreams and desires now never to be fulfilled, at least not with her. It is said that God never gives you more than you can handle.  I wish God didn’t have so much confidence in me sometimes! And yet as promised, the gifts of shift continue to reveal themselves as understanding replaces pain. The messages of Conversations with God, along with my training as a grief and recovery counselor, have helped me through the toughest of times for sure, but it has also set the stage for my personal transformation in a direction I would have never thought possible. Without the loss, this current version of me could not exist. Without the change, this current experience could not take shape or form. And as always, good comes out of bad to create great. And now Patty, unburdened by physical form, shows up to remind us all, through me in this moment, that life is always working in our favor. A message I will continue to speak as long as I have breath.

    If you have been inspired by the messages of CwG or any spiritual writings, you know they are here to remind us to remember who we really are, especially during the times when it would be very easy to forget. That is also the job of angels, both here and there, to show up and help us to remember, to guide us through, to be the light unto the darkness. Patty was an angel in physical form who now has shown up for me as an angel to guide me through the next chapter of my life…and for this I am forever grateful.

    As I write this, the sun has just peaked through my window, a new day is born, how appropriate as a rebirth takes place before my very eyes. Having and holding these kinds of experiences make the tough times worth the price of admission. Having people like Patty in your life makes life worth living.

    So I begin again. I take the parts from the old version of me that work and I leave behind the parts of me that no longer work, knowing they served me well for they brought me here. With gratitude I say goodbye and begin again.

    I am ready to take on this new opportunity to be a messenger and helper at the Conversations with God Foundation. One of my very first actions will be to create a partnership program, an opportunity where we can co-create together, the bringing forth the messages of CwG through the living of your purpose, passion, and your reason for being. If you have been touched by the messages of CwG and wish to become a grander version of yourself through the living of your life purpose and doing so in partnership with the CwG Foundation, if this sounds like something you would be interested in learning more about, then please reach out to me. I will be creating programs going forward to give opportunities for others to be of service, but I am also going to be looking for those in spirit, those inspired individuals that would like to create with us, to ensure that the legacy of the CwG messages continues long after we are gone. My realization once again through the loss of my dear friend Patty, and now through her inspiration to me, that the messages of Conversations with God changed my life forever, and it continues to do so. My gift to give back is to ensure that these messages continue to touch the lives of those who are reawakening to who they really are. This I know makes my dear angel friend Patty smile, for it was her passion…and still is.

    If making a difference in the world while ensuring the legacy of CwG sound like something you want to explore with the CwG Foundation, reach out to me:  JR@CWG.ORG

    Thank you, Dear Patty, for all that you have been, are now, and forever will be…an angel without end. May you guide my every action to benefit the world we serve, together forever, in love and in spirit. Your friend – JR

    (J.R. Westen, D.D. is a Holistic Health & Spiritual Counselor who has worked and presented side-by-side with Neale Donald Walsch for over a decade. He is passionate about helping individuals move beyond their emotional and spiritual challenges, transforming breakdowns into breakthroughs. His coaching provides practical wisdom and guidance that can be immediately incorporated to shift one’s experience of life. As is true for most impactful teachers, J.R.’s own struggles and triumphs inspired him to find powerful ways of helping others. Sober since June 1, 1986, J.R.’s passion for helping individuals move through intense life challenges drove him to also specialize in Addiction and Grief Recovery. J.R. currently shares his gift of counseling & coaching with individuals from around the world through the Wellness Center, Simply Vibrant, located on Long Island N.Y.  In addition, he operates “Change House” a place where people come to transform, he also works with Escondido Sobering Services and now serves as the administrator and program director for the Conversations with God Foundation. He can be contacted at JR@theglobalconversation.com, or to book an appointment, write support@simplyvibrant.com.)

  • What to Do When Anger Becomes Your Trigger Response

    What do you do with the stuff that easily triggers anger?  I’m an easy going, peaceful and loving person, but I have my moments where I lose it, like when my kids throw tantrums or are exceptionally whiny, or someone treats me with disrespect.  I get that we are all human and anger is a natural emotion, but in these situations it just feels awful and I always regret it.  How do we show up as who we really are in those moments?  I sometimes feel like a terrible person!

    Martha, San Francisco

     

    Hi Martha,

    Great question, and I think we can all relate to it. I’m glad you used the example of “losing it” with your kids, because those blessed little creatures sure know how to push our buttons and make us feel the furthest thing from spiritually evolved (coming from a mother of a “lively” 3 year old).  I’m going to use this example as I explain why we have some strong emotional responses that don’t feel so great sometimes as well as how to shift them.

    Conversations with God discusses the concept of “giving meaning to things”, saying that nothing in this world has any meaning save the meaning we give it.  So a thing is not “good” or “bad” by itself, it is simply a thing that is occurring and those who are observing this occurrence are the ones who assign the meaning of it being either a bad thing or a good thing.  Now let’s apply this concept to the thing we call “kids throwing tantrums”, something I happen to be very familiar with, and I’ll speak from my point of view since I can’t reach into your mind to access yours.

    The meaning I have assigned in the past to my child throwing a whopper of a tantrum (and total transparency here, please don’t judge!), looks something like this, “She is being so irrational right now for no reason, she is not listening to me which is disrespectful and undermines my parenting.  And this is awful to experience!”  The meaning I assigned that occurrence was making me feel bad, and triggering an emotional response of anger and irritation, which used to cause me either to raise my voice, get frustrated, things that certainly didn’t help the situation.  Presently, I am happy to report that I’ve assigned this occurrence a new meaning, which looks something like this, “Wow, my little baby is having a difficult time right now, she’s clearly overwhelmed by something and doesn’t know how to manage her emotions yet.  Poor thing!”  This new meaning triggers my emotional response of compassion, which now causes me to practice patience, tolerance, and even scoop the little tyrant up and hug her until she calms down.  Voila, my experience of this occurrence is now vastly different and much, much better for all involved, simply because I changed the way I was looking at it.

    So I encourage you, Martha, to take a deep look at those common situations that occur in your life that trigger your anger.  Ask yourself what meaning you are currently giving each of them, and then consciously assign them a new meaning that feels better to you.  And then, of course, practice implementing them.  You’re not a terrible person, you’re an amazing person for noticing something that you’re not in alignment with and wanting to change it.

     

    (Nova Wightman is a CWG Life Coach, as well as the owner and operator of Go Within Life Coaching, www.gowithincoaching.com, specializing in helping individuals blend their spirituality with their humanity in a way that makes life more enjoyable, easy, and fulfilling.  She can be reached at Nova@theglobalconversation.com. )

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to: Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com, where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • Therapy for Therapy: Can we really change our behavior?

    Anxiety. Stress. Fear. These are just a few of the many ways that I have heard my classmates describe their high school experience. Yet these seemed to be the most common descriptions I have heard about this period of life for people between the ages of 14 and 18. As I look at my own high school experience, I too recognize that it has been anything but a carefree journey. Through the combination of social interactions and academic expectations, teens are becoming overloaded. But by how much?

    Apparently, it’s enough to drive us crazy. In a 2000 publication, the American Psychological Association (APA) reported that the average teenager will experience the same level of anxiety as that of a 1950s psychiatric patient. And this was just for the average teenager before the time of Twitter and Facebook. What would this data look like now? And, more importantly, why hasn’t anything been done about this teenage mental pandemic since?

    Though the level of anxiety teenagers feel has skyrocketed, the psychological treatments for this problem has remained virtually the same. Across the board, stress therapy has focused on the concept of coping with our stressors. Even the Center for Disease Control (CDC) has highly recommended stress management techniques that act as distraction to our mind from our stressors. The activities outlined by the CDC include participating on a sport, taking up a hobby, becoming socially involved, and of course, looking for professional help. By attempting to change our behavior, therapy tries to change our thoughts, and is often unsuccessful.  Though these activities do help alleviate stress, they are only temporary in their affect. After the activity has finished and the session is over, the fear, stress, and anxiety will still persist in our thoughts.

    This still means that we are trapped in the same cycle. What if I want to do more than just “deal” with my stress? What if I actually want to change the way I feel?

    By focusing purely on reaction, therapy has forgotten all about the creation side of the spectrum. We CAN choose whether we will simply react to the events of life or let our own decisions construct an entirely new concept on how to live life. By changing our thoughts, it changes our behavior.

    In this mindset (or rather, open mindedness), we employ the Core Message of the Be-Do-Have Paradigm. With Have-Do-Be state, we rely on outside factors to shape our journey for us, while in the Be-Do-Have Paradigm, we are the source of our own change. Though our beliefs in our Old Cultural Story still think it is rational that we must have things to do stuff to be stress-free, we know that this simply is not the way. To change our thoughts, we must BE the creative cycle of Be-Do-Have, rather than the reactionary Have-Do-Be. By just being what you truly wish to be, you can do things that reinforce that state of being. And by doing these behaviors, you will have the lifestyle that you want to live.

    If this sounds simple, it should. The entire concept of the Be-Do-Have Paradigm is that it is naturally applicable – it doesn’t require toiling hours or rigorous schedules. By being calm, by being flexible, by being controlled, we can take a look at our stress inducing environments with entirely new eyes. Suddenly, when you are being composed instead of acting composed, life’s unpredictability doesn’t seem that stressful anymore. So go ahead and try the Be-Do-Have Paradigm, and be your own triumph. At the very least, I know you will BE happier!

    (Lauren is a Feature Editor of The Global Conversation. She lives in Wood Dale, IL, and can be reached at Lauren@TheGlobalConversation.com)

  • Imagine a world beyond peace

    “We can never obtain peace in the outer world until we make peace with ourselves” ~ Dalai Lama

    What comes after peace?

    Have you ever stopped to think about this?

    We spend so much of our time and energy working to attain both inner and global peace, but have we ever stopped to think about what this really means?

    What is on the other side of Peace?

    Twice in my life, I have broken a board with my bare hand. There is one simple rule to this technique. You must not focus on breaking the board but rather on breaking through the board. This means placing your attention not on breaking the board but on seeing your hand on the other side of the broken board.

    Perhaps we need to apply this technique to our quest for peace.

    Several years ago, when my son was eight years old, we were discussing the possibility of creating a video game that did not include war and violence.

    As the discussion moved into the possibility of world peace, my son in his infinite wisdom said,

    “People are not ready for that. Without conflict there would be no plot.  And without a plot, no one would know what to do.”

    I was speechless.

    My eight year old son had just summed up in one simple sentence why the world has continued this cycle of war and conflict since the beginning of time.  I could not get this thought out of my head for weeks.

    I realized that our children are being taught to live in the cycle of conflict. Not only through propaganda, video games and media. They are learning the importance of conflict in English class!

    The foundation of every paper they write is that a plot must consist of an introduction, conflict, and resolution. In fact, every story that we read is based on this core principal. It is our collective story!

    How do we write a new story?

    I dedicated the last four years of my life to mastering a new story; not for the world, but for myself. In fully dropping a storyline that clings to conflict, I free myself to imagine a world beyond peace.  As I dropped my attachment to conflict, I discovered that not only were my actions tied to the cycle of conflict and resolution, my desire for intimacy was woven into this same cycle.

    Stop for a second and think about relationship. Most intimate moments come from joining together around conflict. We have a problem; reach out to a friend for comfort. The friend either commiserates by sharing her/his own similar problems or helps us find a resolution. We are comforted by these moments of intimate bonding.

    So how do we create intimacy beyond conflict?

    A few weeks ago, I had the honor of being present at the Common Grounds of Peace Forum, with His Holiness the Dalai Lama and several world peace advocates.

    I smiled when the moderator, Ann Curry, read this question,

    “We focus so much attention on attaining world peace. What comes after peace?”

    After four years of contemplating this very question, I anxiously awaited the response from these notable peace leaders.

    One by one, each person attempted to answer. Yet, each answer simply reiterating the need for peace. Not one of these renowned peace advocates actually answered the question. Even more significant is that not one of them even seemed to realize that they were not answering the question.

    Then His Holiness, The Dalai Lama, with his brilliant smile and light-hearted nature spoke. He shared that when you have peace at your core, you will be happy and you will have more friends.

    “And,” he said, “everyone likes more friends.”

    Simple and true.

    Yes, after peace comes joy. We must start by finding this joy within ourselves.

    As we release our attachment to storylines of conflict, we will discover a whole new way of connecting to others. We will discover a new way of seeing this world.

    Begin by imagining a new and vibrant world.  See a world that is more vibrant and colorful than you have ever before imagined. This world has unlimited possibilities and its only plot is to explore and create beauty. In this world, everything moves naturally into its most perfect form.

    Meditating on this “Vibrant New Earth” immediately brings life into harmony. More than that, meditating on this Vibrant New Earth is the greatest gift we can offer our world in its quest for peace.

    We are co-creators of this Universe. We must be able to see a world of joy in order to move through peace and create the world we desire.

    John Lennon understood this in the 70’s when he planted the seed of intent with his song Imagine.

    We have all heard the song. We have felt the vibration of peace it carries:  But have we actually taken the time to Imagine?

    Take a moment to contemplate these lyrics. Really let the images of a joy filled world penetrate you. Let yourself feel the world you imagine.

    “Imagine there’s no heaven
    It’s easy if you try
    No hell below us
    Above us only sky
    Imagine all the people living for today

    Imagine there’s no countries
    It isn’t hard to do
    Nothing to kill or die for
    And no religion too
    Imagine all the people living life in peace

    You, you may say
    I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one
    I hope someday you’ll join us
    And the world will be as one”

    John Lennon

    Imagination is the gateway to creation.  Let’s join together and imagine a world beyond peace.  Let’s co-create in this moment a world filled with playful and creative joy.

    (Sheila Applegate, MSW, is a clinical therapist, motivational presenter, author and teacher.  Sheila’s passion is to provide a forum for people to process emotion and integrate spiritual understanding into their daily lives. For over 20 years, Sheila has combined her broad formal training with her continual personal awakening to bring forth the message of Oneness through Divine Love. Sheila’s first book “Enchanted One: The Portal to Love,” released in December 2012, is a work of love that weaves together messages from the Divine Feminine and highlights her personal experiences in embracing the full spectrum of human emotion as a gateway to living in Oneness.  www.sheilaapplegate.com)

    (If you would like to contribute an article you have authored to the Guest Column, please submit it to our Managing Editor, Lisa McCormack, for possible publication in this space. Not all submissions can be published, due to the number of submissions and sometimes because of other content considerations, but all are encouraged. Send submissions to Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com. Please label the topic: “Guest Column.”)

  • HUMANITY’S MESSAGE: DON’T DO AS
    WE MODEL, DO AS WE SAY

    People all over the planet are now reexamining themselves. As the New Year has begun they are looking at themselves as individuals and deciding what changes they wish to make, and they are looking at their entire culture, the groups to which they belong, and the whole global society—and in this process they are re-thinking what it means to be human.

    Do humans really need to control, and use up, the largest portion of the world’s resources, while exerting the largest level of control over the world’s nations and their people, in order to create “the land of the free and the home of the brave”? Is this what it means to be free and brave?

    Do humans really need to kill each other by the thousands in violent revolutions in Syria and Libya and elsewhere on the globe throughout human history in order to create their lives the way they want to live them in nations ruled by strong-willed despots?

    Do humans really need to degrade, abuse, attack and rape the females among them, at the rate of one every 22 minutes as reported in India, in order to misguidedly assert some horribly mistaken notion of male superiority?

    And do we need to lie, cheat, steal, and murder on an individual basis in order to simply get what we want in life?

    Do we know no better way to behave? What would it take for us to rid our species of these deplorable deportments? It’s all very well and good to say that, well, it’s only the minority among us who do these things, yet how do we explain that in the second half of the first quarter of the twenty-first century (not the third century, thank you, or the twelfth century) we are still behaving in such a primitive fashion?

    Could it be—might it just be—that what we are showing ourselves and teaching our children about what it means to be human is totally opposite to what we say we want our species to be? That it is, in fact, morally corrupt and socially depraved?

    It is all these things, of course, and that’s the problem. But the even bigger problem is that we can’t admit that this is the problem.

    Hey, we’re doing nothing wrong here!, we tell ourselves. Sure we graphically depict violence and killing in our entertainments and games; sure we objectify women in everything from our advertisements to our religions in our culture; sure we emphasize that Might is Right and To The Victor Go The Spoils from board games to board rooms—but this has nothing to do with why rape and killing and ruthless, go-for-the-jugular competition is rampant on this planet! One thing has nothing to do with the other, and get that straight! The things we model have nothing to do with the things we do, and we’re sick and tired of hearing you wimpy liberals telling us that it’s all our Culture’s fault! We’re going to continue to sell cars with pictures of half-naked women, and to sell movies with pictures of people getting their heads blown off, and we want you to shut up about it!! There’s money to be made here!

    This article is Part III of an ongoing series:
    LAYING THE GROUNDWORK FOR TOMORROW

    Now in the last installment of this series we began what I have called the Carol Bass Dialogues. This is a string of commentaries based on an entry made on January 3rd by a lovely woman of that name. I picked Carol’s entry out of the dozens that were placed here because I found it wonderfully reflective of where so many people find themselves today.

    Carol wrote about the challenges of moving into 2013, and of life in this post-modern world. She spoke about the fear she feels regarding the future, and about her lack of confidence as she looks ahead to Tomorrow.

    “At my age to feel so much fear and uncertainty is not a good place to be,” she said. I’m not sure I agree about the Uncertainty part, Carol. I think that it is when human beings are certain about things that they become dangerous. Give me someone who is unsure rather than someone who is Dead Sure every time.

    We do well to keep questioning ourselves, we do well to not have all the answers, because that keeps us searching for them. Or as Conversations with God says: “The question! The question! The answer to the question is in the question itself.”

    The reason that humanity is in such a precarious place right now is precisely because we’re certain we’re doing everything right. Many people are, at least. The people in power are. They are sure that their economic system is the right way to do it. They are sure that their politics are right. They are sure that the increasing violence of society has nothing to with violence in movies, on television, and in video games. Kids understand, these are just games. People understand, it’s just a movie.

    Riiight.

    So you know what, Carol? I think it’s a good thing that more and more people now are uncertain about our future, and unsure of the way to build it. Uncertainty is the farthest edge of Creation. And if ever there was a time for our species to recreate itself anew, this is it. We can’t keep going on like this.

    Carol Bass also said…
    “It seems that so many have turned their back on what is right and what is wrong. The ten commandments according to the bible have become just another thing to cast off as just someone’s religious beliefs but not necessarily truth.”

    Well, Carol, as you may know, Conversations with God says there is no such thing as “right” and “wrong.” It also says there’s no such thing as the Ten Commandments. Wow. What do you think of that? What if that were true? How can that be true? What implication does that have for society?

    Is Carol right? Is it this kind of tossing away of our fundamental beliefs that is adding to the problem—if not causing it?

    That’s next. We’ll look at that next.

    Pass these articles around. Send the link to your friends. Talk about them on Facebook. Bring them up at the office. Let’s have The Conversation of the Century. We would do well to be talking about these things.

    (A Note from the Global Conversation Project Team: If you join the Civil Rights Movement for the Soul and start a Conversation of the Century group in your home, Neale will personally join in the group’s explorations by live link on a regular basis. More on this as the series of articles here continues.)

  • Food fight!!!
    Are you ready to get your hands dirty?

    Joining the progressive movement of environmental stewards who are zealously embracing and actively stepping more fully into the concept of sustainable living, Jennifer and Jason Helvenston, Orlando, Florida, set an impressive goal of producing 75% of the food they consume on the property they own and live on.  And what a bountiful and lush edible oasis they have cultivated with their own two hands, a 25×25 foot vegetable garden in their front yard, brimming with succulent tomatoes, mouthwatering leafy greens, and a wide variety of other colorful and nutrient-dense produce.  Their garden has grown to be so plentiful and robust that they generously share it with neighbors and friends, educating passers-by with gardening techniques and sharing the gift of their wisdom and experience freely.

    Sounds wonderful, right?

    Not to everyone, unfortunately.

    This health-boosting, life-sustaining, crafted-with-love patch of vegetation, affectionately named the “Patriot Garden” by the Helvenstons, is on the chopping block by the City of Orlando officials for not being in compliance with the City’s code.  Fines of up to $500 a day will begin to accrue if the young couple does not uproot their garden and replace it with code-appropriate traditional grass.

    But these forward-thinking, earth-friendly homeowners are not going down without a fight.  “The greatest freedom you can give someone is the freedom to know they will not go hungry,” said Jason Helvenston. “Our Patriot Garden pays for all of its costs in healthy food and lifestyle while having the lowest possible carbon footprint. It supplies valuable food while being attractive. I really do not understand why there is even a discussion. They will take our house before they take our Patriot Garden.”

    It is alarming to me that in a day and age where the natural resources on our planet are being pilfered, the food we consume is laden with chemicals and preservatives, and, perhaps most unimaginable of all, there are hundreds, if not thousands, of people in our world who die every day because they do not have a morsel of food to put in their mouth, that we would consider placing more importance on maintaining outdated zoning codes or landscape uniformity/conformity than we do to the welfare of our planet and the well-being of all our brothers and sisters.

    We, as a society, are ignoring and destroying one of our most important relationships of all:  Our relationship with Mother Earth.

    At what point in time did it become more important to have a perfectly manicured lawn than to contribute to the vitality and sustainability of life as we know it?  What levels of indifference and negligence and abuse will we allow ourselves to sink to before the results of which will ultimately cause us to agree at least on some basic level that we have got some real work to do and some significant changes to make, both individually and collectively, locally and globally, if we want to continue to rely on our planet to support and sustain us in the way we have come to expect it to?

    With the legal muscle of the Institute for Justice Florida Chapter backing them, Jason and Jennifer Helvenston are launching “Plant a Seed, Change the Law,” a protest of Orlando’s law, which they say violates their constitutional right to peacefully use their property to grow their own food.

    And they just may be putting a dent in some of the City’s antiquated laws as some Orlando planners have proposed changes to the code.  Upon entering office several years ago, the city mayor himself, Buddy Dyer, launched Green Works Orlando with the goal of becoming one of most environmentally friendly cities in the country and established four community vegetable gardens around the city.  But City officials admit the code has fallen behind the rebirth of urban gardening.

    To see a photo of the Helvenston’s front-yard garden and to follow their Patriot Garden blog, click here.  If you would like to support the Helvenstons and their ability to continue to grow their own food, you can sign their petition to the City of Orlando here on the Change.org website.

    After all, this movement is not solely about supporting Jennifer and Jason’s rights to grow and consume their own produce; this is much, much bigger.  We are at a critical juncture at this time on our earth where we all are faced with a choice, an opportunity to decide what is truly important, what truly matters.  And as a natural outgrowth of that choice, if we desire to ensure that our world will continue to be an abundant and peaceful place for us and our children and their children and their children and their children to live and grow and thrive upon, we will do as the Helvenstons did – boldly declare that decision, stand up to the stagnant and rigid beliefs held within the pages of the Old Cultural Story,  and “get our hands dirty” by beginning to co-create the kind of world that we all desire and the kind of world which God intended for us to have.

    (Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation.  She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team atwww.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com)