The Global Conversation

Tag: ego

  • Does what you read pass the “my life” test?

     

    “…The power to create is derived from the inner strength that is produced through unity.

    Stop thinking of yourself as separate, and all the true power that comes from the inner strength of unity is yours-as a worldwide society, and as an individual part of that whole—to wield as you wish.”

    (CWG book 3, p.43)

    When I read books like CWG, I like to to do the “my life” test. Are they just nice words, or do they somehow have meaning in my life. Can I see how the words might have already proven to be true in my life.

    These words have. Let me tell you a little story.

    One day, about 7 years ago, I went to a homeowners meeting in my neighborhood, and I asked  if our neighborhood had considered a program for recycling. The President of the HOA said it was likely a question that should be asked of our local water district, at their Board meetings…and asked me if I would be the “committee” that went to the next meeting, and asked the question, representing our neighborhood. I decided I would, since it was clear that the others in attendance were also in favor of recycling.

    So, I went to the Water Board and asked them if they would consider recycling. They kindly informed me that they had looked into it about 5 years before, but no one was interested. I then simply said, “I’m interested.”  They said they would look again, and told me to come back in a month to the next meeting.

    So I did…and they had forgotten to look into it. So I told them I was still interested. They said they would look into it, and come back next month.

    So I did…and I brought with me facts and figures that I had found on the internet that supported the need for recycling. (At that time the U.S. actually threw away enough aluminum to rebuild the entire U.S. commercial air fleet!) The Board had looked into it this time, and had some preliminary pricing, and possible vendors! The Board then said they would consider it, and asked me to come back next month.

    So I did! This time they discussed it in the open meeting. This time they voted on it…and approved it! We had recycling! Not only did we have recycling in my neighborhood, we had it in the whole water district. Not only did we have it, but they had a fund surplus and the first year was going to be paid for by the surplus.

    I was stunned that one person, sitting patiently, simply letting her Water Board know that she was sincerely interested in recycling, took only 4 months to achieve her goal.

    That was my ego talking, of course, because right after that last meeting one of the Board members took me aside and said that he had been trying to get recycling for years, and thanked me for coming to the meetings, month after month, to show that I was serious, and get the Board to act.

    I realized that I was the person put in the right place at the right time to join with him in achieving his goal that had become mine as well. This, in addition to the President of the HOA who empowered my purpose by giving me the “committee” status, and the other homeowners who united with me in purpose at that same meeting.

    I understood, then, that one person really does have the power to achieve great things in their world…especially if they realize they are never really alone, and actively work with others to achieve those great things!  And I understand now that the words of CWG above pass the “my life” test.

    The question I now ask of you:  What little change might you be able to make in your home, neighborhood, or city, (or office, church and more!) that would come to life, if only someone were willing to give it voice? How can you join in someone else’s goal? How can you demonstrate that one is really ONE?  How can you/have you test(ed) the words you read in your life?

    (Therese Wilson is a published poet, and is the administrator of, and Spiritual Helper at, the global website at www.cwghelpingoutreach.com  She may be contacted at: Therese@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

     

  • What to do when you fail

    Teacher:  I am looking for an exceptional student.

    Prospective Student:  What are the requirements for the position?

    Teacher:  Failures!  The student needs to have come through many failures.

    Prospective Student:  You’ve found the right person!

    People are not necessarily forthcoming when it comes to discussing their failures, but there is so much to be learned if we properly analyze them.  Some of the most important lessons you will ever learn will come from the analysis of the failures you have had and the application of the lessons you have learned from them.

    Everyone will have an opportunity to fail at some point in life.  It is unpleasant, and for good reason.  Failures are the one of the Uni-verse’s main methods of education.  When we fail, it is our time to re-assess our actions, our information and our desires.  We are being asked to learn something.  Every failure gives us an opportunity to learn humility, which is one of the greatest and perhaps most overlooked assets.  In today’s world, who wants to be humble?  It’s like a 4-letter word.  And yet, humility simply means the ability to see clearly what we are and what we are not, where we begin and where we end.  It is a great thing to work on.

    The ego dislikes failing.  The very idea of being humble makes the ego cringe.  Notice your ego when it flares up, thank it for sharing, and re-commit yourself to learning what you need to learn so you do not have to revisit the same failure more than once.

    How can we best learn from our failures?  Let’s look at the “3 Ds” – Desire, Direction and Discipline.  These are what I call “the three necessities.”  These are the required ingredients for success in any venture.

    The first ingredient we must have to succeed is desire.  Desire fuels our day-to-day journey and makes our work enjoyable even through the challenges.  If we lack the desire to do something, if it is not in alignment with our ultimate goals, we will most certainly fail.  Even if we get the thing we are working towards, it will be a vacuous attainment at best.  We will have been pursuing something for the wrong reasons.

    I have an amazing friend who pursued a financial career, and had great “success” with it until he was so miserable inside that he woke up to the reality that what he had pursued was out of alignment with his heart.  Due to his ability to analyze and correct his alignment, my friend was able to take this failure and turn it into many future successes.

    Now, if we have the desire, we will then need direction.  How do we get it done?  What do we need to know?  Who can help us?

    Perhaps you have set out down a path toward a goal that you did not know how to reach. You make mistakes. Occasionally you get lucky.  You get knocked down and you get back up.  With persistence, you may eventually reach your goal, but it is always best to seek direction from people who have been where you are trying to go.  These are teachers, guides, mentors.  They light the way.

    With desire and proper direction, you are well on your way to success.  Yet, without the ability to apply desire and direction in a strategic way, you may find your goals remain just out of reach.  This brings us to the third necessity, another four-letter word in our society known as discipline.

    Ironically, discipline is the precursor to joy.  When you sit down to learn the piano, you start by learning scales.  It can be tedious, boring and frustrating.  You apply discipline, you keep showing up, and you develop skill.  Eventually, you sit down at the piano and your teacher says, “Now, just play.”  You experience a profound joy and liberation in playing piano, but it required discipline first.

    Coming off a failure, we can feel a sense of desperation to jump right back in and make something work.  We must be careful not to rush into the next thing until we have completed a period of assessment, adjustment, and sometimes grief-work if necessary.  In time, we will become naturally ready to receive the teaching that Universe has for us. With patience, we will be able to do the necessary work so that our failures will become catalysts for many future successes.  Put another way, when you lose, don’t lose the lesson!

    I wish this for you.

    Love, Peace and Light.

    Tommy Rosen
    Tommy Rosen

    Tommy Rosen

    (Tommy Rosen is a yoga teacher and addiction recovery expert who has spent the last two decades immersed in recovery, yoga and wellness. Tommy is certified in both Hatha and Kundalini Yoga and Meditation. He is one of the pioneers in the burgeoning field of Yoga and Recovery, which utilizes yoga and meditation to help people overcome addictions and build fulfilling lives. 

    Tommy is the Co-Producer and Host of The Recovery 2.0: Beyond Addiction Online Conference, which features 35 talks with globally recognized experts offering diverse perspectives on addiction and is attended by tens of thousands of people from over 70 countries:  Recovery2Point0.com.  Tommy is also co-founder and producer of Tadasana: The International Festival of Yoga & Music, an annual multi-day festival in Southern California.  

     As a respected expert, Rosen teaches and speaks regularly at yoga conferences and festivals, including Wanderlust, Hanuman, Tadasana and many others. He also teaches annually at Esalen, Omega and Kripalu and runs yoga/recovery workshops and retreats internationally.  Tommy’s blogs and articles have appeared in The Daily Love, LA Yoga, Huffington Post, Elephant Journal, MindBodyGreen.com and Intent.com to name but a few. He is also a featured GAIAM TV yoga teacher.

     Tommy’s first book, “Recovery 2.0:  Beyond Addiction,” will be out from Hay House in the Spring of 2014. The Recovery 2.0 DVD series is launching in the spring of 2013.  Tommy and his wife, noted yoga instructor Kia Miller, live in Venice, California where they teach yoga, and grow organic vegetables in their backyard.)

    (If you would like to contribute an article you have authored to the Guest Column, please submit it to our Managing Editor, Lisa McCormack, for possible publication in this space. Not all submissions can be published, due to the number of submissions and sometimes because of other content considerations, but all are encouraged. Send submissions to Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com. Please label the topic: “Guest Column.”)

  • I am in need of such help right now.

    I am reading WECCE, and I am in need of such help right now. I am full of anxiety, fear, and loneliness for the first time in my life. During the past 2 months, my best friend moved away, my boyfriend, who I loved dearly, broke things off.  Then last week my dog was killed.  I know in my heart and soul that I am supposed to be going through these changes, but I’m having such a hard time letting things go. I built my life for two 1/2 years around my boyfriend.  I have lived alone in several cities with job transfers, etc. And I LOVE where I am living now, and I thought I had met someone with so many interests. I had some of the best times in my life with this person, but he could not give me the spiritual support and move on to build a future with me.  I completely lost and disliked myself.  I KNOW of all this, so why is my heart just clinging to everything?  Why can’t I feel ANY joy in anything I do or see?  I try and try to see the beauty in my home, in nature, in ALL things that brought me such great joy. I just want to let everything go..let go of the pain, let go of the wondering of how I manifested this all. I never imagined I would feel such loneliness – ever.  

    I know my pain will heal and I will feel (and eat) normally again. I will continue to pray and meditate to love myself more. Here it comes…BUT…loving yourself when you are BY yourself is pretty easy (I think), as I have lived alone quite a bit in my life.  The big test comes when you are joined with someone else. I have been emotionally unavailable and feared intimacy ALL my life – hence why I have attracted men that are the same. I want to do everything in my power to change that. How do I know when I’m really ready?  And to really know that my subconscious is going to attract someone that will be good for me?  Do I trust my feeling?  How do I lose the fear? I would appreciate any help….

    C.D.

    Dear C.D.,

    WECCE is about how to embrace Change (another word for God/Evolution), and how to choose how we live in that change.  Part of that process involves looking at our current Truth.  What version of that truth are we living?  Most of us are living in distorted truth.  We can, however, move pretty easily to apparent Truth by simply reframing it with no judgment.  For instance, “My boyfriend broke things off” could merely be “My boyfriend is not with me anymore. ”  “I completely lost and disliked myself” could be “I was not being who I really am in the relationship.”  Even “I can’t feel any joy” could be transformed with “I am experiencing a lack of joy right now,” which would easily allow you to experience the lack of joy with Gratitude, because you know it is only what you are feeling right now, not something that has to go on forever…unless you choose to let it go on forever.

    For every negative thought, there is the opposite positive one.  Look for these opposites, C.D., as you re-train yourself.  It takes practice!  If you are even reaching out, it means that you are beginning to do just that…practice being good to yourself!  Negativity is definitely not good for you or anyone else.

    Take a good look, and you will see your post is all about the past!  This has nothing to do, ultimately, with now…unless you allow it to be.  In reading WECCE, you will have read that this is all past data.  This past data came from many sources, all of which thought that they were protecting you in some way…and all of which were subconscious, and controlled by the ego.  The ego is the part of you that defines you as human, as an individual human, but, nonetheless, is also the part of us that operates out of fear.  This fear is designed to keep us in the familiar and actually stop us from moving into what is truly our better selves.  Fear holds us in place in the now, not in the manner of being present, but from the place of looking back and avoiding looking and moving forward.

    Life, as they say, begins at the edge of your comfort zone…and your comfort zone is fear.  Why do you wish to live your life in fear?  It is serving you in some way?   Since all we do serves us.  Do you get to define yourself as the person who is emotionally unavailable?  or the person who is fearful of intimacy?  In some way, this has served you, but do you wish it to continue to serve you?  Yes, we can choose to love what the past has shown us (in this case you know intimately what fear and unavailable feel like and how you are when you embrace them) and actually choose to be the opposite of that!  This is a world of context, of opposites, and if you know one thing, you are now very well able to know the other…if you choose to remember.

    I would take the “gut” test when you have a thought.  Your tummy will tell you if you are coming from fear or love.  Ask yourself why you even feel you have to have someone in your life right now.  How does the answer feel?  Look in the mirror and look into your eyes and very quietly tell yourself you love you…and keep doing it.

    The first time I read in CWG the part about saying out loud, “I love sex or money or…” and then it asked me to say loudly, “I love me!” I found it amazing that I was unable to say that without hesitation.   Wow!   And I am a pretty self-confident person, so I knew if it was difficult for me, it must be almost impossible for others.  I was okay with all of it, but not the unabashed loving of myself!

    C.D., not only can you tell yourself you love yourself, I would like to tell you something else…you are love!  Just by being here, you have demonstrated that you are love!  By writing this note, you have shown you can overcome fear, which is a supreme act of self love.  How wonderful is that?

    Be gentle with yourself and be proactive…choose!   You are choosing Change right now, actively, because passivity has not served you well.  Way to go!

    Therese

    (Therese Wilson is a published poet, and is the administrator of the global website at www.ChangingChange.net, which offers spiritual assistance from a team of Spiritual Helpers responding to every post from readers within 24 hours or less, and offers insight, suggestions, and companionship during moments of unbidden, unexpected, unwelcome change on the journey of life. She may be contacted at Therese@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

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