Tag: embarrassment

  • The Shaming of America by Advertisers

    Apologies to the rest of the world, but this is aimed more at the advertising industry in the United States and how they use the subconscious mind to brainwash Americans into believing that a.) there’s something “wrong” with them, b.) they should be ashamed of what’s “wrong” with them, c.) if they don’t fix what’s “wrong” with them they will never be happy and d.) that that advertiser has THE perfect fix for what “ails” them.

    Make no mistake: the advertising industry is fully aware of what they are doing. They spend billions of dollars each year coming up with ads that send subtle messages to the subconscious mind. Have you noticed how, in the last 20 years, the pace of many commercials has gone from dialog to a head-spinning flash of images and words and music? The conscious mind is often not able to take in the huge quantity of images and sounds and but the subconscious mind remembers everything. But without guidance from the conscious mind, the subconscious draws its own conclusions from what it sees and hears.

    There are several commercials for a medication that treats plaque psoriasis, a skin disease that creates red, raised often scaly patches of skin. It is a disease of the immune system. It’s not something you can catch from someone else; it’s not something you get because you don’t have good hygiene; it’s in no way an indication of what kind of person you are. And yet if you watch the commercial for the medication, you are led to believe that you should be embarrassed and ashamed because you have plaque psoriasis. I understand people are going to judge others based on appearance, but rather than suggesting that those who need the medication not give into the stigmatization of those who have the disease, it reinforces the stigma by showing people staring at the red patches and then walking away or looking at the person with plaque psoriasis with scorn. It even talks about the “embarrassing” problems of plaque psoriasis.

    Then there’s the commercials for incontinent products. They promise to ship them in plain brown boxes so that no one knows what you’re getting. They too say something about no more embarrassing trips to the store. Incontinence is a medical condition! It has a plethora of causes, ranging from traumatic injury to cancer to old age.

    Women have been told they must shave their legs and their underarms and to that end the business world has developed razors with built-in moisturizers, waxes, sprays and even some hair-removal piece of equipment that fits in the palm of your hand. No more embarrassing hair issues! As if where the hair on your body grows is within your control, so you should be embarrassed if it grows where society says it shouldn’t grow!

    Men are not immune to being shamed by commercials! You’re not a “real man” unless your body looks like the ones on those body building commercials.  Or unless you can achieve an erection at the drop of a hat!

    Both men and women have been told they should be ashamed if they’re experiencing thinning hair, as if it is within their control how much of their hair they lose during their lifetime. Testimonials from satisfied clients talk about how embarrassed they were by their appearance before they had their treatment.

    And these are just some of the things that we humans really don’t have any control over, but according to the advertisers, we should still be ashamed that this is an issue in our life!

    Then, of course, there’s your common, everyday commercials that suggest that your car isn’t  big enough, fast enough or have enough gadgets to hold your head up in the neighborhood. Or you’re not eating the right foods or drinking the best bottled water or wearing the correct shoes or your dishes aren’t spot free and if you just buy their brand, you’ll be on top of the world and everyone will look up to you and respect you and think what an amazing person you are.

    The advertisements don’t always have to be on television either. Magazines that are supposed to be “empowering” women have ads on virtually every other page that tell women they look too old and need some cream or treatment to prevent aging, that they don’t look really pretty unless you wear a certain eye liner or mascara or foundation, and, of course, your hair has to colored so that no one can see any grey because God forbid you be proud of your grey hairs! And you must be skinnier. Always.

    There are some studies who say that most Americans see anywhere from 3,000-10,000 advertising images every single day! Others put the number at about 250. But just think about how many times you see ads on your cell phone, on billboards, on the television, how many ads you hear on the radio, how many you read in magazines.

    Each one of these ads is saying something to your subconscious and the vast majority of the time, the message is not a healthy one. Most of them tell your subconscious that you are not as good as the person who uses the product being advertised. Most of them tell your subconscious you are somehow “less” if you use another product.  Most imply that you are lacking something vital without their product in your home.  Some even flat out state that you should be embarrassed for conditions that are beyond your control.

    Next time you sit down to watch TV or listen to the radio or read a magazine, pay attention to the messages that are being delivered to your subconscious mind. Until you are aware that these messages are being projected, you can’t do anything to counter them! Instead of buying into the shaming tactics of advertisers, be proud of Who You Are!

    CwG tells us that we are all perfect just the way we are! That Goddess loves us unconditionally and accepts us without question! We do not need to change anything about ourselves in order to be acceptable to and loved by the Divine! That we have nothing to be ashamed about because there are no mistakes. Everything is the way it is supposed to be because we co-created it that way!

    Celebrate that which makes you a unique individuation of the Divine! You have a unique role in the Divine plan and no one but you can play that part, so let your light shine and don’t hide it under a blanket of shame because some advertiser wants to sell you a product you don’t really need.

     

     

  • Who’s judging who…and why?

    I have been having some serious family issues lately, and, I admit, the sound must carry to the neighbors.  I have a religious neighbor (we obviously have very different views and parenting styles) who, out of the blue, came up to tell me, in a condescending way, that they pray for us all the time.  She is so judgmental!  Now, if it someone were to say that to you, how would you respond in a shove it up your you-know-what, kindly kind of way??

    Hillery in Montana

     

    Dear Hillery,

    Very simply, I would thank her for her kind thoughts.  And tell her I can use all the kind thoughts I can get!

    I would also not assume that she is without drama/trauma in her own life, so I might also tell her that I would keep her in my prayers as well.

    You referred to how judgmental she is…let her judge.  You are also judging her.  There is a difference between noticing what is, and being judgmental, BTW.  When there is a negative emotion that attaches itself to our perception of the other person, as opposed to the action, we have moved into judgment.  It is natural to react to this emotion.  It is also likely clear to her that you feel this way, and that you don’t think that her way is okay.  So, the cycle of judgment keeps going on and on.

    But you can stop that cycle, Hillery, simply by noticing what you are doing, noticing that she is doing the best she can, and change your mind about her.  How?  Just take what she really means, (that she knows things are not perfect in your world, and you could likely use a little help), and throw out the doctrine and judgment she brings to it.  That simple shift removes your judgment moving back at her.

    There is a very good chance that she felt awkward about saying anything to you, and that she had to muster up the courage to speak to you.  Further, is it also possible that your reaction to her words is your embarrassment in knowing that others know you are struggling, and are witnessing the drama?   Is it possible that you don’t think it is okay what is happening in your life?   We do seem to want the outside world to see only the perfect little family picture, don’t we?

    Sweet Hillary, is it also possible that the judgment you are reacting to is your self judgment?  If so, stop.  Change your mind.  Don’t let fear (embarrassment) and judgment hold you in place.  Let the energy of her, in essence, saying, “You are not alone.”, be what flows through you.  Know that Divinity does not expect perfection from you, because She thinks you are already perfect, no matter that it may appear it is not.

    You may even wish to strike up a conversation with your neighbor, from a new perspective.  Who knows, she may have been reaching out to you from her pain, and you may be able to help each other.  This might actually be the perfect time to teach her a new prayer:

    Thank you Creator/God, for letting me know that this problem has already been solved.  Please help me now to see my part in that solution.

    Therese

    (Therese Wilson is a published poet, and is the administrator of the global website at www.cwghelpingoutreach.com  She may be contacted at:                                                              Therese@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

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