Tag: sex

  • Polio, Sex, and a Priest

    At first glance, seeing the words “polio,” “sex,” and “priest” together in a sentence suggests the beginning of what promises to be a dreadfully distasteful joke.  But I am here to tell you that the most-recent film I had the truest pleasure of viewing, The Sessions, while it is brimming with playful humor and wit, is no joke.

    This daring movie, which takes place in 1988, is based on the true life story of Mark O’Brien (John Hawkes), a man who spends his nights entombed in an iron lung and moves through his days being wheeled around on a gurney by one of his caretakers, all as a result of contracting polio at the tender age of seven years old, a debilitating disease which eventually left him unable to use all but three muscles in his body:  one muscle in his right foot, one muscle in his neck, and one muscle in his jaw.  Thanks to the efforts of a loving and devoted family, who chose to care for Mark at home instead of institutionalizing their beloved polio-stricken son, Mark soared past the grim 18-month life-expectancy statistics at the time and lived to be 49 years old.

    Mark’s spirit far surpassed the limitations of his frail body, earning him a graduate degree from UC Berkeley and a successful career as a celebrated poet and respected journalist, yet his Soul and his Body and his Mind yearned for the one thing that life had not given him:  an intimate sexual experience with a woman.  Even though Mark’s disease had weakened his muscles to the point where he had very little, if any, mobility or muscle coordination, he was still able to experience sensation in his twisted and fragile body, and he longed for the sensual touch of a woman, the passion of a physical connection, and the sensation of an orgasm that wasn’t simply a random, unprovoked, meaningless occurrence.

    Through his research into sexuality and the disabled, Mark was introduced to the idea of hiring a sexual surrogate to assist him with his first sexual experience.  Contemplating and internally struggling with the decision of whether or not to pursue this unusual path, a choice that would run counter to his Catholic upbringing, Mark sought the counsel of Fr. Brendan (William H. Macy), a priest in his church, who suddenly and unexpectedly found himself invited to take a closer look at his own truth, to question his own beliefs, and to consider the possibility of changing his own perspective.  While this emotionally tortured and physically paralyzed man lay vulnerably before him, asking if God would be upset if he had sex outside of marriage, Fr. Brendan offers to him, “In my heart, I feel like he will give you a free pass on this one.  Go for it.”

    Mark goes on to hire Cheryl Cohen Greene (Helen Hunt) as a sex therapist with whom he would share his first experience of sexual intercourse over a span of six sessions.   Their unconventional relationship transitions from a matter-of-fact sexual experience into one of mutual tenderness and self-realization.  This is not a movie about sex.  This is a movie about Love.  This is a movie about the journey of the Soul.  This is a movie about, as Conversations with God teaches us, understanding that your Truth comes from within, and that when you change the source of your Truth, you allow yourself to experience life in an entirely different way…in the way that it was meant to be.

    This film is raw and explicit, humorous and heart-breaking, inspiring and emotionally shocking, gutsy and tender.  If ever there was a movie that demonstrates that our lives are not about us, The Sessions would be it.  If ever there was a movie that reflected the infinite possibilities held within each and every one of us, it would be this one.

    This movie is currently showing in theaters around the world.  Save an evening to see a wonderful film that you will be grateful you brought into your life.

    (Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation.  She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)

    (If there is a book, movie, music CD, etc. that you would like to recommend to our worldwide audience, please submit it to our Managing Editor, Lisa McCormack, for possible publication in this space. Not all submissions can be published, due to the number of submissions and sometimes because of other content considerations, but all are encouraged. Send submissions to Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com. Please label the topic: “Review”)

  • How does God feel about sex before marriage?

    I am scared and confused, and I wish someone would tell me what is the REAL DEAL about how God feels about sexual intimacy between people who love each other but aren’t married yet. I am caught between the Bible and what CWG has to say. From what I have read of CWG, God seems very easy going about sex. The Bible implies (and sometimes firmly states) that sexual purity is a must and that God won’t hear the prayers of someone who is sexually immoral. But, I’m not trying to be immoral. I just want to love and be loved by the person of my choice. Why is that bad? My friendship with God means everything to me. He is my best friend and He has walked with me my whole life. I don’t want to feel like I am betraying him by being disobedient. All I want is to do the right thing. Can you give me your perspective? Thank you, Annie, for listening… Frances

    Dear Frances…Thank you for reaching out. You asked for the “REAL DEAL about how God feels about sexual intimacy between people who love each other but aren’t married yet.”

    Okay, here it is: God = Love. God is all there is, everywhere present, in all things seen and unseen. Love is all there is, everywhere present, in all things seen and unseen (even though it’s hard to recognize sometimes, when it’s been distorted by fear).

    Since God is all there is, and Love is all there is, how can any expression of Love between two people possibly be bad? It cannot, dear Frances. Love wants to be expressed, and that’s what we came here to physicality for. YOU get to decide what feels right for you, and no matter what decision you make, please know that God loves you and is perfectly okay with it. God will never abandon you. It is impossible for the reason stated above: You are part of God, because God is all there is.

    Please allow yourself to feel pure joy. Allow yourself to live your own truth. And always, allow yourself to feel love, in whatever way feels joyous and true to you!

    (Annie Sims is the Global Director of CWG Advanced Programs, is a Conversations With God Coach and author/instructor of the CWG Online School. To connect with Annie, please email her at Annie@TheGlobalConversation.com.

    (If you would like a question considered for publication, please submit your request to:  Advice@TheGlobalConversation.com where our team is waiting to hear from you.)

  • My virginity goes to the highest bidder

    Catarina Migliorini is a beautiful 20-year-old Brazilian woman…who also happens to be a virgin. She will be engaging in her first sexual experience in an airplane in-flight between the countries of the United States and Australia with a man from Japan named Natsu. While this may sound like an unusually exotic and romantic experience, this arrangement’s unique set of circumstances have thrust this story onto center stage, where it is receiving worldwide attention and is being met with overwhelming criticism.

    The man known only as “Natsu” beat out several other wealthy men from around the world as the highest bidder in an online auction at VirginsWanted.com where he paid $780,000 to have sex with a virgin.

    Where the story gets even more interesting, and perhaps slightly more morally complicated, is that Catarina has pledged to donate 90% of the money to charities that will build homes in the struggling Brazilian state of Santa Catarina.

    In an effort to circumvent any laws regarding prostitution, the tryst is scheduled to take place in an airplane flying 30,000 feet in the air.  Answering to the outcries of engaging in prostitution, in an article in New York Daily Mail, Catarina responded, “If you only do it once in your life, then you are not a prostitute, just like if you take one amazing photograph it does not automatically make you a photographer. The auction is just business, I’m a romantic girl at heart and believe in love. But this will make a big difference to my area.”

    Do the proposed altruistic intentions of Miss Migliorini outweigh or mitigate the morality questions that this arrangement gives rise to for so many outraged observers?

    Why is it that the bulk of the public disapproval is being aimed at Caratina’s involvement in this peculiar relationship and not equally levied against “Natsu” (who is remaining curiously anonymous)?

    And perhaps most importantly:

    Is there truly anything “wrong” with this mutually agreed-upon rendezvous?

    Within the teachings of Conversations with God, God reminds us that there is no such thing as “wrong” or “right,” that if such a concept were true, upon whose definition of “wrong” or “right” would a thing be judged as so? As demonstrated by the mere fact that prostitution is legal in one out of the 50 states in the United States — and legal in some countries around the world, but not others — even laws that have been designed and created to draw a distinction between “wrong” and “right” do not across-the-board define wrongness or rightness.

    Setting aside for a moment questions surrounding the legality of this arrangement, does the purchase of the presumed sexual innocence of this young lady create any larger questions around what our relationships are intended to provide? Larger questions around what the sexual experience, both physically and spiritually, is intended to serve? Larger questions around whether sex is best reserved for only the most committed and monogamous partners…or whether it is a gift to be enjoyed freely and playfully between consenting, passionate, creative, spirited adults?

    Examining our thoughts and perspectives, and questioning the data that we are relying upon, creates opportunities for us to stretch and flex our “belief” boundaries and helps us to understand more fully what it is we hold true about ourselves, what it is we hold true about relationships, and ultimately what it is we hold true about God.

    With the November 6 presidential election right around the corner, stories like this one serve as a bold reminder to me that many, many people will be casting their votes largely — or perhaps even solely — based upon morality issues and deeply held values. However, if we do not know what it is we believe, why we believe what we believe, or even take the time to think about it, how can we expect to be purposeful and creative participants in this Game of Life?

    (Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation.  She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)