If I say “I love you,” will you say it back?

Isn’t it heartwarming and wonderful to watch very young children, two-, three-, four-year-olds, who express and demonstrate their love so spontaneously and unreservedly?  It’s not unusual to hear the collective sound of a harmonious “awww” from observers on a playground witnessing two new young friends sharing in an impromptu hug or unforeseen kiss on the cheek. These children live in pure awareness.  Their love is unfiltered, not yet programmed, authentic, allowing them to exemplify the level and kind of love we all yearn for but have somehow forgotten how to experience.

But why have we forgotten?

At some point in our childhood, we are exposed to and told to believe in a different kind of love.  This different kind of love works swiftly to reprogram what we come here already knowing:  that we already ARE love.  This different kind of love then works tirelessly to convince us that if we “do this” or “be that” or “do things in a particular way,” we will finally earn and be rewarded the love of another.  Haven’t we all, at some point or another in our lives, yearned to hear the words “I love you”?

But what do we really mean when we utter these three words to another with an underlying hope that we will, in turn, hear “I love you” back?   To say nothing of the paralyzing fear that the possibility exists that we may not be the recipient of another’s confirmation of love.  Would it be possible to be in a relationship where the knowing of one’s love was so palpable that the desire and need to hear this verbal affirmation would no longer present itself?

Somewhere along the way, in an attempt to capture the essence of love in a way that makes sense, we boxed it into our language, as we do many of life’s esoteric ideas and concepts, and formulated our own version of love.  We have minimized, twisted, stretched, warped, contorted, and manipulated this small but powerful phrase — “I love you” — to the point that its meaning is almost spiritually unrecognizable.  We hinge or hasten our expression of love upon some need-driven expectation of what we may or may not receive in return.

Imagine a world where we did not condition our love, or the expression of it, upon an assurance and acknowledgment that we will be loved back, a world where everyone demonstrates their love freely, openly, and unconditionally, where love was not bartered over or bargained for.  I have, on more than one occasion, found myself asking the question:  Are we even capable of experiencing unconditional love for a period of time beyond an occasional moment or two?

And the answer I receive is that if we fully awakened to who we really are – all of us – we would never place another condition upon our love.  We would not need to prove love’s reciprocity because we would already know and feel its omnipresence.  Fear and doubt would never cause us to hesitate in expressing our deepest gratitude and affection to anyone, as we would no longer buy into a perceived need to self-protect; but rather we would each place into the world our highest intentions and actions, giving freely from the source of our own abundance, understanding that the entire purpose of our being here in the first place has very little, if anything, to do with ourselves…and everything to do with all those with whom we share our path.

I once saw an interview with Tony Robbins, the well-known motivational speaker, where he was asked if he gets nervous before he walks out on a stage in front of thousands of people.  His answer was (paraphrasing):  “If I thought that going out on that stage had anything to do with me, I would be nervous, tongue-tied, struggling to find my words.  But going out there has nothing to do with me.  It is about those people in the audience.  I am here for them.”

That, to me, is unconditional love, giving your gifts absent the necessity to receive anything particular in return, a choice and demonstration of your Highest Self which arises out of a deeper understanding of why you are here.   Unconditional love asks, “Who am I in the room to heal?  And how will I let them know I am here?”

Perhaps as our world continues to shed its Old Cultural Story, the one which carries with it a “different kind of love,” we will collectively begin to once again behold the world as our playground, just as we did when we were children, spontaneously and unreservedly declaring and expressing, returning to Love and a remembrance of Who We Really Are.

(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation.  She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com)