That’s right, I hear voices — four of them actually. And tonight I recognized them and saw very clearly what was happening, and it started with a prayer. I prayed while laying in savasana after an inspiring yoga class. My prayer was a simple one, a typical one even. I knew I had to get this blog up. And I am somewhat of an inspirational writer. What I mean by that is when something in my life inspires me, the thoughts come fast and furious. When this happens, I need to get to the computer quickly or at the very least a pad and pen.
This past week, I haven’t had the opportunity to let those things that I felt inspired to write about get written down or entered into the computer. My busy life was stringing out my current blog past when it was time to change it and I needed some inspiration. So I prayed. I asked God in what I recognized was my voice, “God, please bring through me the words that those reading my blog this week are seeking to hear.” I continued in my head with the invocation, although this one had a different voice, albeit it was still my voice. The inflection was not as strong and committed, and it stuttered a little.
The prayer continued in this shaky voice, “Please, God, let this blog be of great service.”
This is where it became interesting. Another voice almost simultaneously, yet seemingly behind the shaky voice, a higher pitched, tense, and uneasy voice, was saying, “Let this be of great service to me as well.”
Just as that voice started to say that, another voice came in and chimed, “You can’t ask for this to serve you!” This voice was clearly different, as were all four of the voices, yet they were, strangely enough, all my voice. It was very clear to me while this was happening ,that these were all my thoughts with my different data attached to them surrounding what each statement was.
This noticing of my thoughts, and the voices attached to them, was fairly unique to me. I have listened to the voices in my head many times and always wondered what was going on there. I have been intrigued about how many different levels there are in my mind. And that kicked off another whole set of thoughts and voices.
The thought process fascinated me, especially with the level of clarity and awareness in which it occurred. I quickly had the thought, “This is the blog!” As soon as I made that decision, I had two simultaneous things going on in my head.
The first was, “Don’t forget this!” I began to repeat the topic over and over in my head so I would remember: “I hear voices, I hear voices…” While repeating that mantra, my secondary thoughts were flying about, “How does this tie in to addiction?” One voice said, “You can’t write about something like that. What if it harms someone?” While immediately another voice said, “Oh, my God, people who hear voices need to read this. They need to know that maybe those voices are there to bring awareness to our thoughts.” This very same voice said, “You must write this article.”
And so that conversation took place in my head in a two-minute span while laying on a floor in a 105 degree room, soaking wet after a ninety-minute yoga class where every aspect of my being was pushed to the limits. This incredible insight happened because I took time for myself. I made time for me and only me to honor what God has given me, a beautiful mind capable of multi-layered thought, an incredible body that is able to do more than I ever give it credit for, and a soul in which to rely upon and seek wisdom, compassion, discipline, and insight from.
You see, recovery is about always seeking greater insight into ourselves, the world around us, and to expand our consciousness of what we believe our Creator to be. If I seek to remain open, and never declare anything to be the ultimate truth, that leaves me with the power to recreate myself and my world at any moment. When you are in a state of mind that is seeking higher states of Divinity, there is no room for relapse.
I understand that for some hearing voices is a sign of mental illness, and that should not be taken lightly, nor should it be made fun of. What I am encouraging people to do here is take a concept and think deeply on it. What I did only took two minutes and the feeling and inspiration was phenomenal.
(Kevin McCormack is a Conversations with God Life Coach, a Spiritual helper on www.changingchange.net, and an Addictions recovery advisor. You can visit his website for more information at www.Kevin-Spiritualmentor.com To connect with Kevin, please email him at Kevin@theglobalconversation.com)
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