If only I had a crystal ball…
I have never been a fan of flying. As a matter of fact, I downright dislike it. There is probably not a better example in my personal life of a time when fear-driven thoughts crowd out clarity and dominate and distort my reality.
What if they forgot to tighten a bolt?
What if there is a leak in the cabin pressure?
What if we hit a flock of birds? Hey, that’s actually happened before!
I once said to my husband while boarding our flight, “If I could just look into a crystal ball and be assured that we will make it safely to our destination and land without incident, then I could relax and actually enjoy this.”
Of course, those “crystal ball” assurances I am looking for never appear, just as they never appear in any of my day-to-day happenings. What I do recognize, however, is the mere fact that I desire an assurance for a particular outcome only serves that aspect of me that doesn’t understand the much broader interweavings of what is going on here in this process of life. And, oh, how quickly my Mind is willing to buy into the story that events must unfold in a certain way, one that protects or preserves or prevents, which only perpetuates the false thought and, thus, belief that I have something to lose.
How many times in life do we hold back or avoid certain situations because we think we have something to lose? And what exactly is it that we believe we will no longer have if we do a particular thing? Or if we enter into a new relationship? Or if we depart from an old relationship? Or if we change careers? Or write that book? Or if we demonstrate who we really are to everyone…all the time?
What I have come to know for myself is that in those moments when I come from a place of fear, I guarantee my own loss. Not the loss of what I think I might lose; but rather the loss of something much more significant: the loss of my Self. In an effort to avoid a perceived loss, I actually cause loss to occur — the loss of experiencing my Soul’s desire. It is only when I include the perspective of my Soul that my field of vision expands to see that there is nothing to lose except that which I deny myself in the process of thinking that there is.
If I withhold my expression of love in my relationships for fear of rejection, even in the smallest of ways — a look, a gesture, a kiss, a touch, in words — I am losing the opportunity to experience myself as an unconditionally loving being. If I avoid challenging tasks in my career for fear that I might “fail,” I am losing the opportunity to experience the full spectrum and outreach of my capabilities. And if I fear flying in an airplane, afraid of losing my life, I am causing myself to lose the opportunity to know myself as an eternal soul.
And those, to me, are the greatest losses of all.
(Lisa McCormack is the Managing Editor & Administrator of The Global Conversation. She is also a member of the Spiritual Helper team at www.ChangingChange.net, a website offering emotional and spiritual support. To connect with Lisa, please e-mail her at Lisa@TheGlobalConversation.com.)